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                         APRIL 1996 * ISSUE 11
============================================================================


                         - The Specialists - 

                DJ Johnson.................Screamin' psychopathic editor
                Jim Andrews................Mad HTML scientist & fugitive
                coLeSLaw...................Takes acid and paints pictures
                Louise Johnson.............A hunter loaded for poets

                         - The Cosmik Writers -

                Jim Andrews..................Music & Software Reviews         
                Cai Campbell.................Music & Record Reviews
                coLeSLAw.....................Record Reviews
                Shaun Dale...................Politics & Record Reviews
                Phil Dirt....................Columnist & Surfmeister Deluxe
                Drew Feinberg................Columnist (MIA)
                David Fenigsohn..............Music & Film
                Alex Gedeon..................Record Reviews
                Keith Gillard................Music & Record Reviews
                Steven Leith.................Politics & Columnist
                Steve Marshall...............Music & Record Reviews
                The Platterpuss..............Record Reviews
                Gloria.......................A Stripper
                
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

             T  A  B  L  E    O  F    C  O  N  T  E  N  T  S


  EDITOR'S NOTES: The disturbing story of how we were scooped on our own
     interview and how small publications with no legal team are pretty
     much fair game for the larger companies like, oh...I dunno...AOL!

  GIVING THANKS - WARREN CUCCURULLO PAYS TRIBUTE TO FRANK ZAPPA: The guitar
     ace discusses his mentor, his years with Missing Persons and his gig
     for the past ten years -- Duran Duran.  And most importantly, he talks
     about his current release, "Thanks To Frank."

  I WAS ABDUCTED BY ALIENS AND FORCED TO INTERVIEW MAN OR ASTRO-MAN?!: Face
     it.  They're here and they're looking for YOU!  Don't believe that they
     walk among us?  Check out this transcript of our editor's personal diary!

  LABELLED - GREEN PEPPER RECORDS: Barely 21 years of age, Brent Oliver has
     become a musical force in his hometown of Edmonton in Alberta, Canada,
     both as a musician and as owner of Green Pepper Records.

  RECORD REVIEWS: Just when you thought we'd settle down we go and add yet
     a few more genres to our menu - Ska, Reggae, Electronic Pop and Jazz
     make their debut's, along with the usual assortment of Punk, Instro,
     Pop and what have you.

  POLITICAL PLAYBOOK - BE SURE TO WEAR A HELMET: Part two in Shaun Dale's
     series on Presidential politics.  In this installment he examines Bob
     Dole's qualifications while trying not to laugh.

  BETWEEN ZERO & ONE - SURVEY SAYS: Steven Leith points out the dangers of
     trusting opinion polls.  We believe that 73% of our readers will agree
     with his views.

  PHIL'S GARAGE: Fans of surf music the world over know the name Phil Dirt.
     As of this issue, Phil joins the Cosmik gang.  The legendary producer
     and disc jockey's inaugural column looks back over his life in the 'verb.

  SHARP POINTED STICK AWARD: Deej socks it to an advertising company, two
     North Carolina politicians and a pair of crooks.  Which probably sounds
     redundant...

  THE DEBRIS FIELD: Always looking to add new things to the mix of "stuff,"
     we're tossing in a concert review or two!

  HOW TO FIND US WHEN WE'RE NOT IN JAIL: E-mail addresses for the folks who
     write this here thing.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


EDITOR'S NOTES: GUESS WHO PICKED A PECK OF COSMIK POCKETS
By DJ Johnson

Hello, Cosmik ones.  Welcome to issue #11.  Since we last "went to press,"
several things have occured that have caused me to go insane.  First of all
I'd like to say that being insane isn't such a terrible thing.  People
expect less of you and the medications are superior to what you find on the
street.  The art supplies are first rate, as well.

What could drive a perfectly normal editor's (humor me, dammit, I'm not
well!) choo-choo to go chuggin' round the bend like this?  Being scooped
on an interview that I worked my ass off to do, that's what.  This month
you will find an interview with Warren Cuccurullo.  He played guitar with
Zappa and with Missing Persons, and he's spent the last ten years with Duran
Duran.  This month he's released "Thanks To Frank," an album of instrumentals
dedicated to his mentor, the amazing Mr. Z.  I interviewed Warren early in
the month and I was very pleased with the way it came out.

Last week I received word that our interview had run in several places in the
space of a few days.  The source seemed to be America Online.  You know, the
outfit that's helping the ecology by providing trillions of floppy disks that
can be ground up and turned into driveways and playgrounds.  Sure enough,
the entire interview was there for download in their "Center Stage" section.
At the end of the interview, much to my horror, was an AOL copyright notice.
Hang on, though.  This gets worse.

Warren's manager and his record label people all jumped on the situation. We
soon found out that the label (Imago) had sent our interview to AOL to edit
into one or two short teasers advertising Warren's upcoming online chat.
It seems that somebody at AOL decided they owned the interview at that point.
The credits were stripped and the new copyright notice was affixed. Strangely
enough, they didn't change the "Cosmik:" before each question.  

By the time we found out about this, the interview had been online for a few
days and had been downloaded and distributed to at least two e-mail lists.
The day after we discovered this, we were informed that it had been posted to
yet another list.  It was spreading like a virus before we'd ever had a chance
to run it in Cosmik Debris.  It was about this time that I started playing
with my toes for comfort.  I also got angry.  I called the 800 number for
AOL.  Y'know what?  They don't have a button you can push to be routed to
their legal department.  To make a very long story short, I was put on hold
three times, and each time I ended up with a dial tone.  Two other times I
was given phone numbers where they said I'd find legal and administrative
types anxiously waiting to be of service.  One of those numbers was
disconnected and one was an 800 number that couldn't be called from out of
state.  Tomorrow somebody's coming out to repair our phone.  The wall is
beyond help.

Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse, somebody sent me a transcript
of the online chat Warren did at AOL.  The "host" traditionally will start
things off with a nice introduction and then turn it over to the subscribers
who are waiting to ask questions.  Well, that's how it went.  The problem is
that the host's introduction was OUR introduction, word for word.  At this
point I began spitting at light fixtures and talking to imaginary friends.

Unfortunately, none of my new imaginary friends are lawyers.  The lawyer
types that I was able to talk to have told me we have no legal recourse.
I'm not sure why that is.  All I know for certain is -- trust no one.
Meanwhile, I hope you don't mind being among the last people on planet
Earth to read our interview with Warren Cuccurullo.  I have to go.  We're
playing "free association twister" in the day room and I don't want to be
late.

OH!!!  Wait!  There was some GOOD stuff, too.  We have a few people to
welcome to Cosmik Debris.  Keith Gillard is a musician and writer who
happens to own Liquid Records.  He is signs on with a pair of excellent
record reviews this month, and in the future he will be writing about
the underground electronic pop scene and even doing some interviews for
us.

Phil Dirt is a well known character in the instro-surf scene, having been
a disc jockey and record producer since the 60s.  We're knocked out to have
his new column, Phil's Garage, in our pages.  Welcome aboard, guys.

That's it.  Enjoy!

Deej


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


 GIVING THANKS - WARREN CUCCURULLO PAYS TRIBUTE TO FRANK ZAPPA
 Interview by DJ Johnson

 Warren Cuccurullo plays the hell out of his guitar.  That's a fact.  He
 could play flawless pop at the highest levels of the game.  He could
 play jazz in the smokiest clubs.  He could challenge the Satriani's and
 Vai's of the world for the instro-metal axe slinger crown any time he
 felt like it.  He could mesmerize you with sublime ambient music.  He
 can rock.

 Unlike most of the players who make similar claims, Cuccurullo backs his
 up with historic fact: he's already done it.  As a member of Frank Zappa's
 band in the "Joe's Garage" era, he played a variety of styles so wide most
 guitarists would simply fall in and vanish.  From rock to avant-garde to
 R&B, genre-hopping was a way of life in Zappa's band.  Heading off on his
 own, Cuccurullo co-founded Missing Persons in 1980.  In 1986 he began an
 association with Duran Duran that continues to this day.  On March 26th,
 Cuccurullo released a solo album entitled "Thanks To Frank," a collection
 of instrumentals recorded with Vinny Coliauta (drums) and Pino Palladino
 (bass), with help from Nicky Beggs (bass), Talvin Singh (tabla) and Warren's
 brother Jerry Cuccurullo (drums).  Early in March, he was kind enough to
 talk to us about the album, his times with Frank Zappa and Missing Persons,
 life in Duran Duran and several other topics.

                        *     *     *     *     *

Cosmik: You know, we always ask about early influences, but in your case
   I'm even more curious than usual.  You've played in so many genres already
   that I figure it's got to be quite a list.  Who influenced you?

WC: Early on it was The Beatles, Elvis, Motown and The Stones. This stuff
   made me want to play guitar. Actually, drums are what I started on when
   I was 9. I got a guitar when I was 10. I liked Led Zeppelin and Hendrix,
   Cream, Deep Purple, Johnny Winter and ZZ Top in the '69 to '72 period...
   Pink Floyd, also. After really discovering Frank Zappa in '73 I went off
   into avant-garde jazz stuff - contemporary classical. In the 80's I loved
   Eno and Bowie and Gabriel and Talking Heads.  Mid 80's was Prince and in
   1988 I discovered Milton Nascimento and Tori Amos in '92.

Cosmik: What were you doing prior to joining Zappa's band?

WC: Driving a truck in Manhattan for my father's business, playing in bands,
   jamming a lot and experimenting with odd time signatures.

Cosmik: How did you come to Zappa's attention and ultimately end up in his
   band?

WC: Davey Moire introduced me to Frank in '76.  We then became friends and
   myself and Al Malkin and some of the other N.Y. crew would hang out with
   FZ when he was in town. He knew we'd always be at the shows around the
   east coast and Smothers would set me up with passes. Terry (Bozzio) and I
   became friends at that time also and me with Thomas Nordegg as well...my
   whole future being plotted out then and there. Occasionally I'd play tapes
   of my solos for FZ and he loved my playing. I think I got the gig because
   of my enthusiasm for his music and his guitar style.

Cosmik: There are so many stories floating around out there. Set the record
   straight.  What was it really like being a member Zappa's band? Was he
   really a slave-driver?

WC: I could never feel slave driven by him. The more the better, I think.
   The band I was in loved challenges. I was the newest member. My energy
   definitely helped us a lot through the "Joe's" sessions.

Cosmik: I'm sure you had a million great moments with Frank's band. What's
   your favorite?

WC: Ms. X. A Toilet You Can Trust, The Canarsie Daiquiri...There's so many.
   Jamming with Frank in my basement in Canarsie has to be the ultimate,
   though.

Cosmik: What were the most important things you learned playing with him?

WC: Discipline and perseverance, organization, and how to get the most out
   of players.

Cosmik: You left in 1980 and formed Missing Persons with Dale and Terry
   Bozzio and Patrick O'Hearn, all former Zappa players.  First of all, was
   there a clear leader in Missing Persons, or was it a total democracy?

Cosmik: Terry, myself and Dale initially set it all up. We wrote all the
   songs and demo'd them, hired sidemen to play live shows, pressed our own
   record when everyone passed on us, and eventually landed a record deal
   with Capitol. Terry had the most experience in the music scene so he felt
   he had the most at stake if it didn't succeed. I think this eventually
   caused some problems within the group. We needed to have the naivete back,
   like when we first got together. The ego wars between Terry and Dale had
   nothing to do with music.

Cosmik: What was the effect of leaving a tightly controlled situation and
   entering into something that loose?

WC: Democracy doesn't mean loose. There has to be focus and control to be
   successful in anything. What better place to absorb the discipline than
   with Frank? We worked hard, we tried to be democratic and eventually it
   paid off.

Cosmik: Was Missing Persons a good experience for you?

WC: It was fantastic. We made it happen, we had some rough times at the end,
   but we learned a lot and grew because of it. I'm putting together a new
   record of unreleased songs and some live stuff from 1981. I hope it's out
   by '97.

Cosmik: Tell us about "Thanks To Frank."  When did you start planning the
   project?

WC: I wrote it as a show, not for a record. When I heard the tape of the show
   I thought "This is an album." That was in July of '94. I wrote the stuff
   in two weeks in June.

Cosmik: How did you choose the players for the album?

WC: Vinnie (Colaiuta) was the obvious choice 'cause we had played together in
   Frank's band. I love his playing. He's unbelievable. He suggested Pino
   because Nick Beggs wasn't available on the second day and that worked out
   great. Shankar recommended Talvin for the tablas and he's amazing too.

Cosmik: Why didn't you use your own studio when you're obviously so
   comfortable working there?

WC: The album needed to be recorded live in the studio. My studio is
   computer-based with no room for a drum set.

Cosmik: Five of eleven tracks were done in one take, and all the others were
   done in two or three.  That's pretty impressive.  How long did you
   rehearse before you went in?

WC: We didn't rehearse. I taught everyone the stuff in the studio. That took
   about 30 to 45 minutes per song at a time, of course. Then we'd run it and
   I'd go over the weak spots and then BANG! - Roll tape.

Cosmik: No overdubs at all, and most or all of it is done as a 3-piece.
   Had you ever worked like that before?

WC: Only in my basement jams 23 years ago, and I'm a much better composer
   now.

Cosmik: How long did the entire album take to record?

WC: Two 16 hour days.

Cosmik: What effects did you use?

WC: The Lexicon Jam Man and the Digitech Whammy Pedal were used heavily and
   some songs were composed around what they do. I love the Eventide SDE3000
   and the Zoom 9050. Also the Sony GP-5 has got some nice effects.

Cosmik: A lot of people shun effects these days, and a lot of people who use
   them seem to misuse them.  You're obviously not one of those.  What's your
   philosophy on using effects?

WC: They are instruments. Don't be a jerk, learn how to play them. They make
   music.

Cosmik: One of the tracks, "Hey Zawinul," is completely different from the
   rest of the album.  What was your inspiration or influence on that one?

WC: This was a piece I wrote so I could play "sitar-like" acoustic guitar.
   So the end solo is very Ravi Shankar influenced, but the melody is very
   Joe Zawinul. so I thought I'd acknowledge Joe in the title - I love his
   stuff.

Cosmik: I'm curious about a few of the song titles.  "Orgasmatron."  Would
   you be a Woody Allen fan, perchance?

WC: I love everything he's done except "Shadows and Fog." But that's probably
   Alan Dershowitz's fault.

Cosmik: "Low Speed Chase."  A little OJ subculture there?

WC: I was so shocked at the level of ignorance in that courtroom. I followed
   every session. I had some other titles but they would be much too
   controversial.

Cosmik: What's your personal favorite track on "Thanks To Frank?"

WC: I love them all, but the last one of the two days was "Tardinha,"
   recorded at 3 A.M.  The interplay between me and Vinnie and Pino is beyond
   beyond.

Cosmik: Is it difficult for you to listen to your own work?  Do you get
   too close to it to be objective?

WC: No. One of my greatest talents is the ability to be objective.

Cosmik: Judging by your style and your work I'd say you're a perfectionist.
   Is that something you always were, or did you learn that from working
   with Frank?

WC: Seeing Frank work definitely changed me forever. You can't be lazy in the
   music business. You have to bring your ideas into reality. That takes
   time. Patience and vision are the keys. Prince showed similar work ethics
   to Frank's. He was another example of how much output you could have if
   you're obsessed and committed to something.

Cosmik: You've sure covered a lot of ground over the years.  From Zappa to
   Missing Persons was a stylistic leap, and nobody would have expected you
   to turn up with Duran Duran.  Have you always been interested in that many
   genres, or did that develop one at a time?

WC: I grew up with AM radio, then FM radio, then Frank, Coltrane, Miles,
   Hendrix and now Brasil. It's all music. Classical - whatever, we're all
   just channelling these notes through us, and then it's just a question of
   taste as to what to do with them. That's why there is so much shit on the
   radio. Some people have horrible taste.

Cosmik: Are there any genres that you just plain can't stand?

WC: Polka, Muzak...anything that's overtly derivative always pisses me off.

Cosmik: What was it about Duran Duran's music that attracted you?

WC: The Bowie influence. Also the way I imagined what I would do in that
   situation, guitar-wise, and what the potential was compositionally.

Cosmik: You toured with them before you became an actual member.  I take
   it things clicked right away.

WC: Definitely. They are great guys and within two years we were writing all
   the songs together.

Cosmik: People who followed you from Zappa to Missing persons might have
   been a little shocked to find you turning up with Duran Duran considering
   the fact that many people considered them to be somewhat lightweight. Did
   you hear a lot of negative comments at first?

WC: No. I think even Frank knew what was to come with me writing in the band.
   The band has grown up a lot in the last ten years.

Cosmik: In the early 90s when everyone said Duran Duran was history, you
   came up with The Wedding Album, which went triple-platinum and surprised
   everybody.  How about you?  Were you all surprised at that level of
   success?

WC: We knew we had something special, but it seems we have to prove ourselves
   every time out. We expect success because we work really hard and there's
   a lot of passion in what we do.

Cosmik: I read somewhere that you were reworking Duran Duran's entire
   catalog.  What does that mean, exactly?

WC: Not exactly. I like to give the old songs a new feel, new energy...It's
   a lot of fun and I'm really good at it.

Cosmik: What are your future plans with Duran Duran?

WC: The new album called Medazzaland will be out in fall '96. It's our best
   work without a doubt. This one will change people's perceptions about us
   forever. Also, Nick (Rhodes) and I started a new band called TV Mania and
   we've been completing our first project, which is a "Joe's Garage" type
   opus called "Bored With Prozac and the Internet." You'll love it. It's a
   way of life.

Cosmik: Do you still use your home studio when you work with them?

WC: This studio is the Duran studio. We do mostly keyboard overdubs and
   vocals here. I like to cut tracks live with a drummer lately, so for that
   I hire a big studio. All the TV Mania stuff was done here though, and
   songs like "Come Undone" as well.

Cosmik: Do you have an engineer on staff, or do you do your own tweaking
   when someone else is recording?

WC: We use someone named Mark Tinley for programming and engineering all TV
   Mania and Duran projects.

Cosmik: How about immediate plans.  Are you going to tour to support
   "Thanks To Frank?"

WC: Hopefully, but financially, it's not very feasible.

Cosmik: What do you have planned after that?  I heard a rumor about another
   big genre-leap in your near future...

WC: The TV Mania project is the most ambitious thing I've ever done. Nick
   feels the same way. If all goes well, we'll have it on Broadway within
   the next three years. The records will come out individually. There's
   three of them. "Bored with Prozac and the Internet - Parts 1, 2 and 3."
   Part one will be out in August. I also have an ambient guitar series
   coming out in October. It's called "Machine Language." The second one of
   these is a collaboration with Shankar.

Cosmik: Will you tour to support that set?

WC: Hopefully.

Cosmik: What do you see yourself doing in ten years time?

WC: More of the same - probably a lot more film composing, probably be on
   our third play by then with TV Mania, solo guitar tours, Duran stadium
   tours - whatever.

Cosmik: You've already honored Frank Zappa with great instrumentals.  In
   your own words, though, what's the most important thing that people should
   know about Frank?

WC: He was the smartest, hardest working and funniest motherfucker ever -
   Period.

                              - * -
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
               
 I WAS ABDUCTED BY ALIENS AND FORCED TO INTERVIEW MAN OR ASTRO-MAN?!
 (Interview by DJ "Earth Geek" Johnson)

 DIARY ENTRY - FEB 20th 1996: I wait in darkness on a lonely rural road.
 A single headlight comes toward me from a direction in which I'm fairly
 certain the road doesn't go.  "Earth Geek Johnson, climb aboard."  I am
 whisked away and un-blindfolded in what looks like any ordinary boiler room,
 except for the forty-two small black and white televisions, the few hundred
 feet of strange plastic tubing and the bzzzzzzzzt-machine thingy, just like
 in all the Frankenstein flicks. I am seated at a small round cafeteria
 table and left alone to wait.  A flash of light momentarily blinds me, and
 when I regain my vision, Coco, The Electronic Monkey Wizard, sits across
 from me.  Thus begins my interview with the bassist of Man Or Astro-Man?,
 Earth's only touring space-alien band since Ziggy & the Spiders broke up.
 
                        *    *    *    *    *
 
 Cosmik:  How long has MOAM? been in existence, now?

 Coco:  Hmmm well, let's see...in earth years, I guess we have actually been
    touring and such for about 3.7623 years, pardon the lack of accuracy...
    but it is an estimate.  We existed as practical theory for a tad longer,
    but what good is theory anyway?

 Cosmik:  How did you get together?

 Coco:  Well, I tell ya...it was kinda a mess from what I hear...but ya know
    I wasn't there...I mean, the deal from my stand point was - POOF! - I was
    on...now don't forget, Star Crunch and Birdstuff had been running some     fly-by-night organization somewhere in G6-32 or thereabouts, but they
    needed someone, or something to take care of the dirty work...like this
    interview...HAHA...so, you see they were gettin' sorta soft...and they
    needed the old knucklebone...so they put their heads together, along with
    some old Atari parts...minus one joystick...and whammo...Coco!

 Cosmik:  Has the style of music been the same since day one?

 Coco:  Well, as you know...music is only a bi-product of the real deal...
    don't ask, but over time our research has shifted, and hence the
    bi-products of that research has shifted...sorta an evolution I guess...
    but not planned, just evolved.  We have been increasing the power levels,
    and we're not sure where it's headed...but we like when shit explodes...
    so off we go...and if a new direction seems to happen, so be it.

 Cosmik:  What were the different earth-music influences that you all
    brought to the band?

 Coco:  Well, from what I can tell, Birdstuff tends to be from that..."do
    it, do it, do it" school of thought...sorta a drivetrain...influenced
    by sheer motivation.  Good thing though.  Star Crunch...well, TV baby,
    TV...what more can I say...although even a progression from him has
    evolved...there was one point where the marriage of Wal-Mart and
    McDonalds was eternal heaven to him...but he has evolved...Buddy Holly
    and Link Wray both gave small DNA samples to Crunch's research early in
    their lives, and, well...you can see the results.

 Cosmik:  Of course, back then you had Dr. Deleto in the band.  When Captain
    Zeno replaced him, was there a lot of difference in style and influence?

 (NOTE: A quiet humming grows louder and Coco vanishes.  Just as quickly,
  Man Or Astro-Man's drummer, Birdstuff, appears where Coco had been just
  moments before.  I take a huge swig of the whiskey that MOAM confidante
  and slave Bookman (esq.) suggested I bring to the interview.  Make note
  to thank Bookman for this wonderful suggestion.  My nerves calm down and
  Birdstuff picks up where Coco left off.)

 Birdstuff:  They were both fine earth specimens.  Dr. Deleto was our first
    "permanent" bass playing unit, and I think on a certain level some of our
    best live shows were while he was with us.  Basically, Dr. Deleto always
    wanted to kick our asses while Captain Zeno always allowed his ass to be
    kicked, but at least Zeno Boy had the gonzoones to quit during the middle
    of a performance.

 Cosmik:  I think the average fan would call your music "surf-punk" or
    "space-punk.:  How would YOU describe it?

 Birdstuff:  We definitely appreciate it when someone picks up on the kinetic
    aspect of the live show and our self-procreated aesthetic and in that
    sense I think we are fairly punk, but as a scene, sound, or movement, we
    like to stay individualized.  The great thing about Alabama was that
    there was no scene. I suppose you could file us under hyper-cerebral
    dork core.

 Cosmik:  You do an incredible amount of PR yourselves, and you obviously do
    a good job of it.  Is that something that came naturally to you, or did
    you study marketing?

 Birdstuff:  No one ever studied marketing, nor would traditional marketing
    have any effect for what we do, because our interests are not tied in
    with monetary concerns.  We always enjoyed the idea of this wacked out
    endeavor and somewhere in-between making stickers and goofy products to
    sell, we got confident playing our instruments.

 Cosmik:  Well, now that Man or Astro-Man? is what it is, and your schedule
    is so jammed with touring and recording, do you ever want to hand over
    the promoting job and take a deep breath and, I dunno, maybe a day off?

 Birdstuff:  We've tried to take breaks, but usually we get bored shitless
    after a week.  This is what we do - we're nerds for hire.  We've had lots
    of management companies contact us, but doing peripheral tasks is nearly
    as fun as the performances.  If we ever let go of that we'll be a bunch
    of sell-out dorks, doing it for the wrong reasons.

 Cosmik:  You guys have to be the busiest band in the indie scene, because
    every few days I hear you're playing another city, sometimes another
    country, and it never seems to stop.  Now that you're temporarily off
    the road, you're right back in the studio again.  How do you deal with
    a pace like that?

 Birdstuff:  It has become somewhat easier since Coco and Star Crunch
    finished their alias duties as university students.  We never thought
    we would play outside of Alabama, so we didn't like wasting the
    opportunities we are allowed.  Ever since the ship busted a galactic
    nut, we've been stranded so we might as well make use of our time on
    earth.

 Cosmik:  Your recording schedule alone must be wild.  MOAM? is possibly the
    most prolific band of all time, or soon will be anyway.  I heard a friend
    of yours saying the reason for so many records is that you guys are too
    generous and you promise records to a lot of different labels.  Is that
    true?

 Birdstuff:  It's really hard to say no.  I'm still floored that anyone would
    be interested enough to want to release the three of us making noise in
    some guy's shack in the middle of Wetumpka, Alabama.

 Cosmik:  Are you still making those promises or have you had to slow down
    a bit?

 Birdstuff:  For a while, anyone that would send us $200 to record and get
    us 5 copies of the record each was welcome to a 7", but it has gotten to
    where we get asked to do about 2 or 3 projects a week.  For now we've
    trimmed down slightly.  However, we soon plan to franchise the band into
    8 working units.

 Cosmik:  I'm sure you must have generated plenty of major label interest,
    since you're always such a hot ticket wherever you play.  Does that
    interest you, or are you more interested in the freedom you have in the
    indie scene?

 Birdstuff:  Being of our distinct cosmic origin, there's even the
    possibility of getting screwed with an independent 7".  It's probably
    best that we don't get overexposed for our own safety.  We did the
    School House Rock compilation for Atlantic and the Space Ghost
    compilation for Geffen, but we have no interest in being earth bound
    due to corporate ties.

 Cosmik:  You do most or all of the producing, right, or at least
    co-producing?

 Birdstuff:  That is generally the case, although it's nice to sometimes
    have an arbitrary party intervene like Steve, so it doesn't completely
    conform into my conception of the band's sound.

 Cosmik: Well, you seem to have the knack.  Did you do that kind of work
    before MOAM?

 Birdstuff:  We've got a great resource at Zero Return, our studio of choice.
    We get to use excellent tube mics through a well-tuned analog 16-track.
    Also, Star Crunch always gets an excellent amp sound, and the studio kit
    sounds phenomenal.  If I have a "knack" it's because of being luckily
    surrounded by a prime recording environment.

 Cosmik:  Do the other guys pretty much turn it over to you in the studio,
    or is there a lot of group-producing happening?

 Birdstuff:  We all have our fields of endeavor within the unit.  We're
    confident or apathetic enough in each other's "expertise" to let them
    reign.  So, as I don't get very much interference in the way of mixing
    and project orientation, Star Crunch is unhindered in most all of the
    song material and Coco gets by doing the ridiculous live tactics that
    makes him the Monkey Boy.  We occasionally serve as each other's editors,
    but that is more rare than common.

 Cosmik:  You just finished working with Steve Albini again, I hear.  He did
    a great job of engineering on "Inside the Head of Mr. Atom."  Do you have
    a pretty easy working relationship with him?

 Birdstuff:  On a personal level, Steve really just fits into our mode of
    goofiness, like getting everybody to record without their shirts on, so
    with juvenile levity we're completely on target with Steve.  In a
    professional sense, Steve leaves us eating edited tape on the control
    room floor.

 Cosmik:  There are a lot of misconceptions floating around about his role
    in the studio.  Seems like a lot of people think that he's your producer.
    Wanna set 'em straight on that?

 Birdstuff:  Steve has an amazing way of un-producing our sound.  I think
    some of the work I've done has sounded more "effect-y" or "gimmicky"
    whereas Steve always makes us sound just as we do live, but only more
    controlled.  He mainly fine tunes.  He often gets involved in sample
    placement and all of the silly space noises.  Honestly, Steve probably
    does play more of a "classic" producer role for us than the majority of
    his recordings, but that is still negligible in standard terms.

 Cosmik:  Speaking of "Mr. Atom" there's a great effect on "Inside the Atom"
    where the guitar cuts out, then cuts back in with just the tail of the
    reverb.  I'd never heard anything quite like that before.  Was that done
    in mixdown, or is that Star Crunch stomping a switch during the
    recording?

 Birdstuff:  All of the effects are done manually and live.  Mr. Crunch has
    never had any post production on the guitar.  On that particular section,
    he is shutting the reverb tank on and off in time with the music simply
    by using an a/b foot switch.

 Cosmik:  I'm curious to know what your favorite MOAM? records are.  So many
    to choose from, I know...

 Birdstuff:  I really like the "Mission Into Chaos" E.P. and the live album.
    Star Crunch is really only distinctly satisfied with the "Project
    Infinity" L.P.  Coco usually says "What's the blue one...?"

 Cosmik:  Do you have to let some time go by before you can appreciate your
    own records?  I mean, it is too close to you when you've just cut the
    record, or can you get into it right away?

 Birdstuff:  I listen to the recordings to a ridiculous level.  We now live
    in North Georgia and have a 3 1/2 hour transport function time getting
    back home from Alabama.  I usually review tapes all the way back to the
    Alpha H.Q.  On the other hand, Star Crunch has never even listened to the
    live album, and a few of the singles.

 Cosmik:  Do you find it somewhat amusing that some people bitch about how
    many records MOAM? put out, or does that bother you?

 Birdstuff:  We put out records for our own enjoyment, not for exposure and
    timing, so of course it gets self-indulgent - it's fucking fun!  If you
    don't like seeing them in the rack, just flip past and go on to the Man
    of War section!

 Cosmik:  How does the song-writing process work within the band?

 Birdstuff:  The first record we all wrote together, but since then more of
    the sonic handi-work has become solely Star Crunch's craft, mostly
    because he has hidden secrets that Coco and I may never fully grasp.

 Cosmik:  How about covers?  Who chooses them and why?

 Birdstuff:  Generally this is based on pattern, fabric, and of course
    during winter, warmth becomes a consideration.

 Cosmik:  Uh, er...yes, alright then.  I've been dying to ask you this one.
    Who's the one who comes up with the great sound clips from the old
    movies?

 Birdstuff:  Generally, I find most of the dialogue because more of my money
    is filtered into the Grade Z video void.   Coco is merely a channel in
    which our sound bites flow.  Star Crunch occasionally researches the
    Astronaut dialogue because he is oh so amused with your primitive space
    program.

 Cosmik:  Is there ever a hassle getting permission to use the clip?

 Birdstuff:  Once these guys from Bally pinball company came out to a show
    and were threatening to sue us over some samples from one of their
    pinball games that we used for a song that was an L.P. bonus track, but
    it turned out that they were actually fans and approved of our thievery.

 Cosmik:  One of the coolest things about your concerts is the uncertainty,
    like "will the samples fire," or "will the TV screens stay on," and what
    makes it cool is the way you handle the goofs on stage.  Are there ever
    times when technical screw ups start to get on your nerves?

 Birdstuff:  This is usually the determining factor of a great or mediocre
    show - the amount of tension that can be digested due to technical
    difficulties.

 Cosmik:  It never seems to matter, anyway, because your shows are so
    amazing.  Every single person I've ever spoken with who've seen you
    guys play live rave about the show and the power of the music.  All
    four of you are in constant high-speed motion.  How do you get up for
    that night after night?

 Birdstuff:  Our ultimate goal has been an all out complete energy expanded
    free for all where if someone passes out, whoever's left just keeps
    playing.  I really still can't fucking believe people want to see us
    play, it makes me want to smash my head through the kick drum every
    night.  We get really excited before every show and it works great
    because it is definitely a show-off factor.  We're not really a single
    unit - we're all basically trying to out-do one another.

 (NOTE: At this point, a faint glow next to the bzzzzzzt-machine-thing grows
  steadily brighter until it becomes Coco, The Electronic Monkey Wizard,
  back from...where ever the hell it was he went.)
  
 Cosmik: Ah, good!  Here's a question for the benefit of our subscribing
    musicians.  You have a very cool bass, a Dan Electro Longhorn.  How did
    you end up with such a rare instrument as your main axe?

 Coco: Hmmmm..ahah..well actually..I had to time travel back to when the
    Danelectro Co, was going under..I managed to score the last bits and
    pieces of various warehouse stock..and build these frankenstein versions
    of longhorns..the bodies are original, the necks and headstocks are
    original, the bridge, electronics, binding, and laminate are new,
    though...but they came together well, viola!

 Cosmik:  What kind of amp are you putting it through?

 Coco:  Well, recording through a Fender Bassman 135 with a 2x15" Fender
    cab..but on the road..ug..admit it..those damn tubes just dont hold up
    to being knock over night after night, so I am using a shittly solid
    state head and a Mesa/Boogie cab..besides, they almost always run the
    bass direct anyway, so why risk ruining that old Fender?  And that little
    solid state head fits in yer pocket too!

 Cosmik:  You get some great thudding bottom end in your sound.  Do you EQ
    down a lot or use flatwound strings?

 Coco:  Just those repro-lipsticks I guess...I dont spend much time with
    it..It seems to work fine without much EQ.

 Cosmik:  Well, our musician-subscribers thank you.  Now, what's next?  Is
    the amazing Astro-Man tour machine hitting the road again soon?

 Coco:  Hitting the road...oh, ya mean...um...yes of course...but you should
    probably just check our www site for current show listings!

 (NOTE: The WWW site is at http://www.astroman.com.  At this point, there
  is an audible humming followed by a loud snap and Coco evaporates once
  again.  The interviewer is getting used to this by now.)

 Cosmik:  Got any advice for rookie bands out there who are just about to
    hit the touring trail?  You ARE the voice of experience, after all...

 Birdstuff:  To give any advice would be to lay a formula on what some
    ridiculous concept of success is.  Everything we do is based on what we
    collectively want to accomplish and predominantly this is by setting our
    own standards.  So unless you want to smell like us, forget it.  Plus
    you guys are primitive earth geeks, why should we give you any help?
                                              
                         *    *    *    *    *
                                                           
 DIARY ENTRY - FEB 26th 1996: I awaken in my own living room with a pounding
 headache and no memory of the past six days.  Upon opening my diary I
 discover the truth -- that I was a participant in the only combination
 rock and roll interview/alien abduction on record.  Thank God I take good
 notes.  Perhaps hypnotic regression will fill in the rest of the blanks.
 Perhaps not.  Make note to try to peddle this interview to "Sightings."
 Or "The X-Files."  Maybe a movie of the week...You never know.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

 LABELLED:  GREEN PEPPER RECORDS
 Brent Oliver (Interviewed by DJ Johnson)


 Brent Oliver hasn't wasted much time.  At the ripe old age of 21 he has
 played in several successful bands, recorded with several others and built
 an excellent independent record label in his hometown of Edmonton in Alberta,
 Canada.  Green Pepper Records releases music from some very diverse artists.
 Their recent release, "The Alberta Covers Compilation," features several
 bands doing punkish covers of songs like "Help," "Big Bottom" and "50 Ways
 To Leave Your Lover." The performances are excellent and unusual, but that's
 exactly what one learns to expect from a Green Pepper release.  Oliver's
 army is on the move.

                          *    *    *    * 
 
 Cosmik: So you're the head honcho at Green Pepper?
 
 Oliver: Yep, I run the whole stinkin' operation. My official title is
    "king-pin" and I sign bands, record bands or set up recordings with
    them, help finance the duplication of the release...cassette, CD, 7",
    etc..distribute it locally and send copies to Cargo records in Montreal
    for  national distribution. I also organize a lot of the gigs for my
    bands and do press releases and general cataloging of files for bios
    and stuff. No one else will help...
 
 Cosmik: From the liner notes on some of your releases, I'd say you stay
    more than a little busy as a player, too.  You can obviously rock on
    several instruments.  How long have you been playing?
 
 Oliver: Well, I started the piano at age 4. After about 10 years of that I
    took up the trombone in junior high. When I was 15 I joined my first
    band as a singer. MILK...there's another band called that right now...I
    should sue. Then when are bass player quit, I took up the bass. In high
    school I played percussion in the Harry Ainlay composite High school
    symphonic band and then moved to String Bass (the big one). In my past
    bands I've mostly played bass (the killing floor, egg - just split up),
    but I've played keyboards and acoustic guitar for Pal Joey and last
    summer I played drums in Aural Sects and I'm about to fill in on the
    skins for the Cowboy Dick reunion. The original drummer Dave Rees plays
    in a little band called SNFU, ever heard of them?
 
 Cosmik: Oh, I believe so!  So where are you from?
 
 Oliver: I'm born and raised here in Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, in a little
    house in the suburbs. 
 
 Cosmik: You're very young considering how much you've done already...
 
 Oliver: On February 25th I turn the ripe old age of 21 years. I think my
    life is over... 
 
 Cosmik: When did you start the Green Pepper Records?
 
 Oliver: I, actually, didn't start the label. It has started by myself and
    my high school buddy, Mikhail Rudnicki. We both were big Beatles fans
    and liked the concept of Apple records. His favorite food was the Green
    Pepper and it kind of went from there. Mike has since moved to Halifax
    and takes a less active role in Green Pepper, he just sits back and
    watches.
 
 Cosmik: Who were your early releases by?
 
 Oliver: Well, let's see. The first release was a tape called "Green Pepper 
    records compilation #1: Eat me!" which was a compilation of Edmonton
    bands...on the surface. Actually, it was just myself and Mike writing
    and playing all the songs and recording it on a 4-track over a couple of 
    months. Very "god-ween-satan" kind of stuff. That was just kind of a one
    off thing and then I figured it should be made into a real company. Our 
    second release was a tape for Sour Jane, a band I was in at the time. The 
    third was by a local audio artist and friend, Mike Ewanus, called 
    "interference" that was really popular amongst the radio-art community in 
    town and in Canada. The 4th release was my first time at the production 
    helm in the studio, recording a 7 inch for local band blanky. The 5th
    release was for local all-agers Soundounce, with members of pawn,
    printing up a 14 song cassette. The 6th release was our ever popular
    "Edmonton Produce" compilation featuring 17 bands from in town and
    released on the popular CD format. Since then we've put out a tapes for
    Pal Joey, Furnace Maintenance, egg and amber 416, plus Cds for pawn, Pal
    Joey and the covers compilation.
 
 Cosmik: What is the current roster like?
 
 Oliver: Our line up is amber 416, Pal Joey, pawn, egg, Furnace Maintenance,
    King Letus, Welcome, nectar and future projects with The Imagineers and
    the Many, from Vancouver.
 
 Cosmik: Which bands have had the most success?
 
 Oliver: As far as sales go, Pal Joey probably takes the cake. Their first
    run of 500 Cds is almost sold out after being out a month, and that's
    just in town. amber 416 sells really well, as does pawn, especially to
    the all-ages crowd. King letus is almost ready to release their first
    CD and they put on great shows to lots of people.
 
 Cosmik: You have a lot of different sounds going on.  The difference 
    between Pal Joey and pawn is like night and day.  Alternative and
    what...would you call pawn "Metal?"

 Oliver: Nah. Metal, to me, has a metal attitude. These are just skate-punks
    that write songs with a few more changes and a few more guitars. I think
    they sound like a cross between Mudhoney, Sepultura, Curtis Mayfield and
    Sebadoh, but maybe it's just me. As for Pal Joey, they're more of a
    country-pop hybrid, Uncle Tupelo-ey i think.
 
 Cosmik: What other genres are you interested in?

 Oliver: Well, to tell you the truth, I've had this argument with a lotof
    people who say "are you into World music or are you into pop?" I'm into
    to music. That means I can like certain things in one style of music
    and other things in others. For example, my old band egg sort-a-sounded
    like a Japanese noise band, but on the other hand, I do a show on the
    local college station here called "Cheatin', Hurtin, and Twangin" which
    is entirely country music. I love Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan as well as Steve
    Earle or the Boredoms. If you don't submit yourself to a certain genre,
    music just ends up being a loteasier to listen to.

 Cosmik: So if you caught a reggae band and you liked the vibe, you would
    have no qualms about signing them?

 Oliver: None whatsoever. Actually, there are a lotof things about reggae
    I like. Reggae has a huge influence on music anywhere, I mean ska
    wouldn't be ska without reggae and punk, eh? Fuck, if I could sign a
    reggae band that was good...I'd be a well rounded label and individual.
     
 Cosmik: Some people think "Canadian" is a genre.  There IS a sound...
    Can you define a Canadian sound? 

 Oliver: Sort of. I guess singing about your girlfriend or your truck could
    be Canadian. Plus, there seems to be a certain beat that Canadian bands
    fall into, but I'm not sure if there is one Canadian sound...at least on
    the indy level. Bands like Kittens, from Winnepeg, are on the same label
    as Hayden (Sonic Unyon) and they're polar opposites musically. I think
    the more indie music that's accessible, the less of any sound, ANY
    country is going to find. Bands will just be bands.
 
 Cosmik: How about an Alberta or Edmonton sound?
 
 Oliver: Not really. Someone told me a couple years ago that everyone in
    Edmonton sounded like the Replacements or SNFU, but the walls are
    breaking down alot. There are the pop bands: Pal Joey, Molly's Reach,
    Bumpercrop...the hardcore bands: pawn, Perceptual Distortion, NRDK...
    the punk bands: choke, nympho, lymphlynch...but I don't think there's
    one sound. Another thing is bands like the Imagineers, who don't sound
    like anybody and they've been around for years. I think Edmonton is
    one of the most diverse places for music on the planet.

 Cosmik: I suspect that a lot of people who haven't been to Edmonton, or
    even to Canada for that matter, might picture it as a small town...
    the simple life and all that.  But it's not small geographically.
    This is a strange question, I guess, but what does Edmonton feel like
    to the people who live there?
 
 Oliver: I guess it's the "small town attitude, big city feeling" thing.
    Everybody in bands around here know everybody else in other bands
    around here, and everybody is pretty cool. There are lots of really
    good friends I've made from this scene and the bands from Edmonton are
    a pretty close knit group. kinda like the Bradys or the Partridges...

 Cosmik: Do you want to sign bands outside of your region?
 
 Oliver: Sometimes. Like this band from Vancouver called the Many who are
    tied in with Bangon Records are hopefully going to do a 7" for us and
    were going to try and do a split green pepper/melodiya records (Calgary)
    10" of Edmonton vs. Calgary bands.

 Cosmik: What is your ultimate vision for Green Pepper?
 
 Oliver: World Domination of course.

 Cosmik: Well you've certainly got the energy for it!

 Oliver: But in the meantime, a pretty good distribution deal would be 
    great where that I could quit my job and make the label my prime focus.
     
 Cosmik: What would you tell a young kid who wanted to start a label?
    What advice would you give?

 Oliver: Just do it. It's easy. Record a band, put out a disc or a tape
    and you're on your way. Everybody thinks it's tough but all you need
    is a little bit of money and you're set.

 Cosmik: Tell us what the next compilation will be?  The Covers comp was
    a killer!
 
 Oliver: Well, we've just finished the follow up to our first CD
    compilation, "Edmonton Produce." It's called Edmonton ReProduce
    (Edmonton Produce 2) and should be out around May. This one has 20
    bands from Edmonton including amber 416, pawn, pal joey, molly's reach,
    cone of silence and a bunch of others.

 Cosmik: Were all the bands on the covers comp actually Green Pepper bands,
    or will they soon be?

 Oliver: Nope. Field Day are on Lethal records out of California, King Letus
    are on my label as are Furnace Maintenance, Pal Joey and egg (R.I.P.).
    The Piemyn, Cone of Silence, choke and Fire Engine Red are indy, Capt.
    Nemo are on their own Raging Postman records and Molly's reach are now
    signed to Passion/Bmg in Canada. Choke and Field Day might end up doing
    something for Green Pepper in the future, but who knows.
  
 Cosmik: What's the most important thing you've learned about the music
    business so far?

 Oliver: That it's not as bad as everyone says it is. If you hang on to
    your ethics and common sense, you won't get screwed over. People in
    the indy community seem to be pretty nice...or they could all be lying
    to me.
 
 Cosmik: Do you want to continue balancing the business and playing ends?
    From what I can tell on the CDs, you're an excellent player.
 
 Oliver: Aw shucks...thanks. I love playing, I love recording, I love
    writing songs, I love running a record label. I'll try balancing it
    until I die.


 ==========================================================================

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    [[     [[   [       [[   [[    [     [       [[   [   [[   [[      
    [[[[[[[[    [[[[[[   [[ [[     [     [[[[[[   [[  [  [[     [[[[[
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    [[    [[    [[[[[[     [     [[[[[   [[[[[[     [[ [[       [[[[[[

 ==========================================================================

   * Hello, and welcome to our largest batch of record reviews ever.
     As you have probably noticed, we're expanding our coverage to
     include as many genres as possible.  This month we welcome
     Keith Gillard to the zine.  Keith is a musician, writer and
     owner of Liquid Records in Vancouver, BC, Canada.  He will
     be covering several genres, but his main stomping ground will
     be the "underground electronic pop" genre.  We are also happy
     as hell to welcome Cai Campbell back to Cosmik Debris.  Cai
     was with us for the first four issues but had to let it go
     for a while to pursue other projects.  We missed him.  Last
     but not least we are now reviewing Ska and Reggae.  This makes
     my day, as I have always been a fan of both forms.  That's
     about it.  Next month you'll find some Jazz reviews!  If you're
     interested in writing reviews for us, particularly if your
     area of knowledge covers genres we haven't got covered yet,
     please send me some mail at moonbaby@serv.net.  Help us make
     Cosmik Debris the ultimate zine for people who love lots of
     styles of music.  Thanks!

      DJ Johnson


                *           *           *           *


      
THE APEMEN - Survival Of The Onbeschofste (Nitro/Demolition Derby)
By The Platterpuss

I saw these guys at Garage Shock back in '94 and, while I had no idea of
what to expect, I walked away from their set a huge fan. For the first
half of their mainly surf styled set they wore these silly ape masks and
they were just so much fun. Surf bands sometimes have a tendency to start
getting a bit draggy after 5 or 6 songs but these guys have managed to
crank out a whole disc's worth of revved-up tunes without letting the
energy level slip even just a little bit. As a nice change of pace they
throw in a Spanish vocal version of The Trashmen's "King Of The Surf"
entitled "El Rey Del Surf" that never fails to get a smile out of me.
Although, towards the end of this 16-songer, some of the songs start to
get a bit samey sounding, I still have no problem recommending this for
your next keg party. (c/o Kris Vermuth, Tervuursesteenweg 1h, 1820 Perk,
BELGIUM) 



THE BEATLES - Anthology 2 (Capitol)
Reviewed by Cai Campbell

At some point in the Beatles career, there was a very tangible shift in their
music.  This almost certainly coincided with their retreat from the stage and
into the studio.  Their music was becoming increasingly complex, yet the
subtleness of this new direction could not penetrate the waves of white noise
still being generated by a legion of fans not yet willing to acknowledge
maturity beyond "Beatlemania."

With the release of the two CD set, The Beatles Anthology 2, this transition
and maturity is captured again, over 30 years after the fact.  This
collection, when compared to Anthology 1, paints a stark contrast.  Anthology
1 showed the Beatles in the early stages of their career, polishing their
performing talents on energy-packed cover versions of their favorite songs
and developing original material which appealed to the pop yearnings of their
young audience.  Anthology 2, with 45 cuts, includes only two covers.  The
majority of the remaining Beatles numbers ask that the audience think beyond
"I Want To Hold Your Hand" and entertain the deeper philosophical implications
of the world.

The opening cut is actually a John Lennon demo recorded in 1977 called "Real
Love."  As with the other '77 Lennon Demo, "Free As A Bird," from Anthology
1, the remaining Beatles add guitar, drums, and vocals to produce the only
other "new" Beatles song in over 25 years.  This slightly morbid endeavor has
many Beatles fans divided, but the song, taken at face value, is a sweet,
innocent number which actually improves upon multiple listenings.  The old
harmonies which first endeared us to the Beatles all those years ago are
there, and no matter how you feel about the concept of digging up John for a
recording session, it is simply great to hear the lads together again.

With the prerequisite "new song" out of the way, the set proceeds to make the
transition from the loveable mop-tops to the studio pioneers, song-writing
giants, and culture-altering hipsters which the Beatles so quickly became.
This set is packed full of studio outtakes, alternate cuts, jams, banter, and
is sprinkled liberally with choice leftover live cuts.  No other Beatles
album, bootleg or otherwise, manages to capture the creative process that was
the Beatles so well as Anthology 2.  Included is a complete, early take of
"Norwegian Wood" which has George Harrison still trying to perfect his
contribution on sitar.  A rare and previously unheard instrumental is
included titled "12-Bar Original."  This great number was slated for the
"Rubber Soul" LP and foreshadows a heavier mood in Beatles music which would
not resurface for at least a few more years.  Probably the best snapshot of
the creative process is evident in the three included takes of "Strawberry
Fields."  It begins with the original John Lennon demo, then moves to take 1
which includes a curious and very psychedelic melotron passage.  Finally, we
are treated to a montage of various other takes, which succeeds in capturing
the feeling of the final studio release, but with many overtones and ideas
present from other directions which were pursued with the song.

This is just a small sampling of the rich collection of material available on
this set, which illustrates the depth and breadth of the Beatles as artists
and Anthology 2 as a package.  I have only touched on the surface of the
wonderfully brilliant job done with putting this collection together.  The
recording quality is exceptionally top-notch, with only a few exceptions
regarding the live material.  This is the Beatles at their creative best.
Forget the bootlegs, this is the real dope.



BIG ASS TRUCK - Kent (Upstart)
By DJ Johnson

When Big Ass Truck released their debut CD last year I was blown away by
how versatile they were.  They were just as hot playing country rock as
they were playing jazz or any of the other half dozen styles on that CD.
On their latest release, "Kent," the band seems to be exploring the funky
regions of their music almost exclusively.  This is both good and bad.
One of the most endearing things about the first CD was the sense of humor
and mischief that seemed to be hiding and snickering behind every riff.
There IS humor here in songs like "Heavy Petting Zoo" and "Dog Chases Iguana
Up A Tree And Barks At It All Night (Parts 1 & 2)," but the mood and
atmosphere, overall, is quite dark.  Even the funny stuff is dark.  As I
said, this is good and bad.  If you enjoyed the funky streetwise aspects of
the debut, this one will make your day.

"Theem From" (nope, it's not a typo) kicks off with a wah'd out guitar ala
"Shaft," but the similarity ends there.  The funky well these guys drink
from is definitely in Memphis, Tennessee.  Booker T. & the MG's influence
is well absorbed into their own sound.  It's interesting to hear the
decendant of that style of funk played with a DJ scratching away in the
background.  That, in fact, is one of the coolest things about Big Ass Truck.
Bands like this don't usually include a full time DJ.  It pays off with a
uniquely cool sound.

Another style they're very good at is psych.  Happily, (for me anyway...the
mind trips were my favorite thing about the debut) they didn't abandon that
style completely.  "Five O'Clock Shadow" is an urban acid-trip that is like
far-left TripHop.  The mystery track is a 15 minute freefall through heavily
reverberated rim shots, throbbing bass and random noises of all sorts.
Eventually, you're dropped into a hard rocking finale that is a big-ass
stomper.

The musicianship of these six guys is something to behold, and they seem to
have found an interesting path to follow.  I, personally, hope the next CD
explores some of the other paths they started down on the debut.  Not because
I don't like what they did on "Kent," but because I want to see what else
they're capable of now.  I'm guessing the answer is "anything they wanna do."
This band has more hooks than a meat locker.  They could choose to play
bubblegum and they'd still have a big ass sound. 



THE BRAIN SURGEONS - Trepanation (Cellsum)
By DJ Johnson

Way back in the pre-punk 70s there was an amazing band called Blue Oyster
Cult.  Though they are largely remembered as a heavy metal act, they were
a whole lot more than that.  They had a magic sound that nobody else could
even approximate.  They had the ability to be heavy and light at the same
time.  BOC recorded two of the most beautiful songs of the 70s ("I Love The
Night" and "Don't Fear The Reaper") and both of them were macabre if you
were paying attention.  Heavy and light.

The Brain Surgeons have brought "the sound" into the 90s with their second
album, "Trepanation."  Former Blue Oyster Cult drummer (and co-founder)
Albert Bouchard and his wife, rock critic Deborah Frost, co-produced this
collection of dark stories and soundscapes.  Frost's vocals cover a three
and a half octave range and an even more impressive range of emotions, from
serene to furious, cold and murderous in the blink of an eye.

The two covers are both outstanding.  Robert Johnson's "Stones In My
Passway" doesn't get covered as often as it should, but The Brain Surgeons
give it the attention and power it deserves.  Frost's hottest vocal is
found on their cover of "Ramblin' Rose," which she screams, snarls, stutters
and growls in a manner that exudes raw sexuality.  The rest of the band
smokes on this track, too.  There are a few spots here where her vocals
don't work, such as on "Medusa," where her power seems to be too much for
the track and she comes off as overwrought.  Happily, those moments are
rare.  Frost is one of the more interesting vocalists to come along lately.
Bouchard plays a ton of instruments on "Trepanation," and he's damned good
at all of them, but it's his drumming that keeps everything crisp.  He's
still the master.  And with songs like "My Civilization," with it's multi-
layered vocals ala "Dominance and Submission" and even the deceptively light
"Everything Is Blue," The Brain Surgeons are creating classic rock that
actually sounds like classic rock.



ERIC CLAPTON -- Crossroads 2 (Polydor Chronicles)
Reviewed by Steve Marshall

One of the first box sets released by a major artist was 1988's superb Eric
Clapton collection, Crossroads. Now, some eight years later, Clapton has
just released a new box set, cleverly entitled, Crossroads 2 -- Live in the
Seventies. Recorded between 1974 and 1978, the new box features some of
Clapton's best performances. Except for five tracks on the first disc
(originally released in a different mix on the album EC Was Here), all the
material on Crossroads 2 is previously unreleased.

Following in the tradition of the more recent box sets, this one comes in a
narrow box, as opposed to the older album-sized boxes. The 44-page booklet
includes some great photos of Eric on stage, as well as liner notes written
by John McDermott, and full musician credits on all the cuts. Since the
material on here only spans five years, some of the songs on the first two
discs appear more than once (albeit from different performances). Sound
quality on the CDs, mixed by Jay Mark, and the team of Jon Astley and Andy
MacPherson (who were involved in the reissue of the Rainbow Concert & the
reissues from The Who) is phenomenal.

Overall, Crossroads 2 is blues intensive (which is great), with a few hits
thrown in here and there for the uninitiated. Disc one is, without a doubt,
the best of the four CDs. There isn't a bad cut on it. It starts with the
acoustic "Walkin' Down the Road", and then goes into the first of three
performances of "Have You Ever Loved a Woman". One of the things that's
really cool here is that you get to hear Clapton and his band really
improvise on stage. Eric calls out the key he wants to play in, and the
band follows right along. There are three different renditions of "Rambling
On My Mind" on disc one, and an interesting, slower version of "Little Wing".

Disc two only contains six songs, but they're great ones. The disc kicks
things off with "Layla", minus the piano/slide guitar portion at the end.
Besides the version on the new Rainbow Concert CD (which isn't really a
"true" Eric Clapton album), this is the first time that a live electric
version of the song has been released commercially. The enduring concert
favorites, "I Shot the Sheriff" and "Badge" are included on the second disc,
with both songs clocking in at over ten minutes each. The highlight on disc
two however (and possibly the entire collection), is the blistering
24-minute version of "Eyesight to the Blind/Why Does Love Got to Be So
Sad?", featuring Carlos Santana & his percussionists. Previously only
available on bootlegs, this track is sure to be the highlight of the box
for a lot of Clapton fans.

Unfortunately, after that, things are a bit disappointing. By the time you
get to the third disc, you're left to listen to Clapton's tired versions of
"Knockin' On Heaven's Door" and the classic rock staple, "Cocaine". Even
worse though, is having to sit through to Marcy Levy's wailing vocals. Aside
from a rousing rendition of "The Core", Levy is at her annoying worst. The
disc still has its merits though, with the excellent cover of "Stormy
Monday", and the medley of "Goin' Down Slow/Rambling on My Mind" (again).

Things begin to pick up again on disc four. It's still not as good as the
first two discs, but it's a lot better than the third one. Half the disc is
great; the other half is just mediocre. The first question that comes to
mind when you look at the track list for disc four is - why does Clapton
keep insisting on putting "Wonderful Tonight" on everything? Do we really
need to hear another version of this song? I know I don't. Luckily, there
are enough great tracks to compensate for the bad. There's an amazing version
of Otis Rush's "Double Trouble" and an excellent "Early in the Morning"
(resurrected by EC on his recent From the Cradle tour). Clapton's cover of
the Stevie Wonder tune "Loving You is Sweeter Than Ever" is quite good as
well.

Despite the shortcomings on the third and fourth discs, Crossroads 2 is
essential for any Clapton fan's collection.



CONCRETE BLONDE -- Recollection (IRS)
By Steve Marshall

When Concrete Blonde broke up two years ago, the music world lost a great
band. Apparently the band had a couple records left on its contract, and
luckily, the band's fans are the ones reaping the benefits. In 1994, IRS
released a collection of B-sides and non-LP tracks called Still in Hollywood.
Now they've released Recollection, the "best" of Concrete Blonde.

Made up of 18 of their hits & album tracks, the CD makes an excellent
starting point for someone just discovering the band. Rather than just
repackaging old material, they included an unreleased live version of the
Janis Joplin classic "Mercedes Benz" for the fans who already have everything
on the CD. Unfortunately, the song is a throwaway. They could have left the
song off, and it would still be a great CD. Better yet, instead of "Mercedes
Benz," they could have given us live versions of the other songs on the CD.
Especially since there was never a live Concrete Blonde album  released
commercially.

If you're a new fan of the band, Recollection is a great place to start your
collection. If you're already a fan, this is a great CD to put on when you
want to listen to the band, but don't want to hear any one particular CD.
Either way, you can't go wrong with this one.




COWBOY JUNKIES -- Lay It Down (Geffen)
by Steve Marshall

I have to admit - long before I heard anything from the new Cowboy Junkies CD,
Lay It Down, I had pretty much dismissed them as just another cure for
insomnia. There were a couple good songs scattered here and there throughout
their repertoire, but nothing too exciting. Their cover of  Lou Reed's "Sweet
Jane" was interesting, but it paled in comparison to the original. Then I saw
them perform an electrifying version of their current single, "A Common
Disaster" on the Letterman show. From that point forward, my opinion of the
band changed. No longer will I include the band in the sleep-inducing "folk"
genre. Providing the radio stations give it the airplay it deserves, Lay It
Down is sure to win over new fans, and please those who have followed the band
for years as well.

Lay It Down has a dark, mysterious feel to it. Due in part to the sultry,
silky vocals of Margo Timmins, as well as the crystalline production work
of John Keane (REM, Indigo Girls), the band has taken on a whole new sound.
There's plenty of underlying electric guitar and feedback throughout to
make things interesting. The ultra cool bass line in "A Common Disaster"
catches your attention immediately. One of the better tracks, "Come Calling"
is included here in two forms - 'his song' (the original version) and 'her
song' (the stripped down, slower version). Another track that really stands
out on the new CD is "Just Want to See", with its Neil Young-like guitar
work (must be something in that Canadian water).

Lay It Down has given me a new respect for a band that I'd previously
considered to be just another boring folk-rock band. Even if you're not a fan
of Cowboy Junkies, check out this CD. 




THE DEAD BOYS (Frankenstein) - Eve Of The Dead Boys (Hell Yeah)
By DJ Johnson

Frankenstein was the band that became The Dead Boys, and this is their 1975
basement demo tape that they were forced to make in order to get a gig
at a Halloween party in a Cleveland club.  The sound is crappy, as you would
expect -- it's hard to hear what Stiv Bators is moaning into the mike.  But
so freakin' what, right?  You already know the words.  "Sonic Reducer" is
here, as is "High Tension Wire" and "Down In Flames."  That's all, folks.
Just three songs that clock in at just over ten minutes.  So let's tally it
up thus far... Lousy sound, short as Walter Carlos' wang...Why the hell is
this thing cool?  Because The Dead Boys had an energy level you could feel
in your bones and a rebel-without-a-conscience attitude. Both of those
things leap out of this murk and slug you in the ear.  After Grammy month
we all need to remember what the hell Rock and Roll is all about. Energy.
This is ten minutes in the 'lectric chair. 




THE DOGMATICS - 1981-86 (Shredder/Vagrant)
By The Platterpuss

The Dogmatics were one of my favorite punk bands in the mid-80s, until the
tragic death of bass player Paul O'Halloran in Oct. of '86.  At their best,
they played an irreverent brand of sing-alongable punk rock that never lost
track of the fun element that has always been a major part of the best Rock
& Roll throughout the ages. In their time they released one single and 2
albums, all of which are included here along with a few previously unreleased
tracks. While not everything they recorded was brilliant, songs like
"Drinking By The Pool", "My Little Sister's Got A Motorbilke", "Shithouse"
and the ultra-classic "Gimme The Shakes" will always rank among some of the
best punk rock songs ever recorded. So, if you were a fan of the band way
back when or if you just want to discover some timeless Rock & Roll, you
definitely need this disc. (75 Plum Tree Lane #3,  San Rafael CA 94901)




REEVES GABRELS - The Sacred Squall of Now (Upstart)
By Jim Andrews

Reeves Gabrels' music teacher once told him he couldn't play the guitar.
I bet Reeves Gabrels' music teacher is still a music teacher.  And I bet 
he can't play the guitar like Reeves Gabrels can.
 
I must admit that I put this CD in the player without the greatest of 
expectations.  The only previous exposure I'd had to Mr. Gabrels was from
Tin Machine, a band whose biggest fan, shall we say, I am not.  Boy was I
pleasantly surprised.
 
If you're looking for a "guitar record", then you definitely won't be 
disappointed.  This guy has more chops than a chainsaw massacre--so what.
It's how he  uses  the chops that makes this recording stand out from
the rest.  No Joe Satriani "Guitar Players do it Faster" bullshit here.
This guy is a song writer through and through--from the sublime "Say that
Now," where Reeves' vocals take on a decidedly Neil Young quality, to the
completely off-the-beaten-path instrumental track "Hushu," to the
"dripping-out-of-the-headphones" cover of "Bad Moon Rising," there is not
a dull moment to be found here.  The recording quality is superb throughout,
both in terms of sonic quality, and in the sheer depth and layering of the
instrumentation.  And it couldn't have been easy.  According to the liner
notes: "no keyboards, synthesizers, or vibrators were used in the making of
this record."  Now, I don't know about the vibrators, but I do know that to
achieve this much depth through organic means requires a lot of time and
care.  It shows.
 
While this is billed as a solo record (and indeed, Mr. Gabrels is responsible
for about seventy-five percent of the sounds that come out of this, as he 
not only takes most of the instrumental and vocal credits, but that of Producer
and Co-Engineer as well) there are some notable guest slots filled in here by
the likes of David Bowie, Hunt Sales, Charlie Sexton -- hell, even  Gary
Oldman gets a turn at the mike.
 
Well, the more I sit here and yak on about this record, the longer it's gonna
be until you get off your butt and go buy it.  Which I highly recommend that
you do as soon as possible.
 
(No synthesizers were used in the writing of this review.  I did, however,
use one vibrator.)



GROVER - My Wild Life  (Zero Hour)
By The Platterpuss

I was fortunate enough to see this fine North Carolina trio a few weeks ago
at Maxwells, opening up for the Insomniacs and The Gripweeds and, while there
were not a whole lot of people in the club when they went on promptly at 10,
they quickly won over anyone who was there. Most, if not all of their songs
are written by singer/guitarist Angie Carlson and she has a style and voice
that's kinda similar to Chrissie Hynde. Most of the songs such as "Hole In My
Eye", "Sweet Thing", "Superhero" and the title track are upbeat rockers with
lots of hooks that will keep you humming long after the disc is over but I
also like some of the ballads like "Bend" and "Anesthesia" where the
combination of catchy melodies and Angie's engaging vocals really draws the
listener in. It would be a real shame if this truly fine band is allowed to
wither away and die in total obscurity so, if you're looking for some quality
pop music with a way above average female lead singer, this is one disc well
worth seeking out. (1600 Broadway,  Station 701,  New York, NY 10019)



THE HAUNTED -  S/T  (Voxx)
The Platterpuss

The Haunted were Montreal's top local group in the mid-60s and, like many of
their contemporaries across North America (and all around the world for that
matter) of the time, they took their inspiration from bands like The Stones,
Kinks and Pretty Things. This 22-song disc collects almost everything that
they ever recorded, including all their singles and their 1967 album.
Although, by 1968 they got caught up in the whole acid-blues thing that I
have no desire to listen to, in their prime, they were as good as it got.
"1-2-5" is an absolute stone classic in that angry, snarly snotty style that
we all know and love so much. "Horror Show" is a Yardbirds-y styled extended
freakout that, while it does sound kinda dated, still has a charm all its own
(and NO drum solo!!). "Eight O'Clock This Morning" is in a poppier vein and
could have been a hit, had it actually been released as a single. The rest of
their repertoire mostly consisted of the cooler standard covers of the day
such as "Out Of Time", "A Message To Pretty", "I Can Only Give You
Everything" (next to the definitive original version by Them, this is the
best rendition I've ever heard) and "I'm A Man". All in all, this is
definitely one rockin' little slab o' plastic and I have no trouble
recommending it to one and all, not only as a piece of history, but as
music that stands up on its own right.



JOHN HIATT -- Walk On (Capitol)
By Steve Marshall

For almost 20 years now, John Hiatt has been considered by many to be one
of America's finest songwriters. His songs have been covered by a diverse
group of performers, including Three Dog Night, Bonnie Raitt, Iggy Pop,
Bob Dylan, The Neville Brothers, and Rosanne Cash. On his 12th album, "Walk
On", Hiatt is back with a few great songs, and a few not so great ones. He's
joined in the studio by Benmont Tench (Tom Petty and The Heartbreakers) on
two songs, two ex-members of The Jayhawks on "You Must Go", and longtime fan,
Raitt, on "I Can't Wait".

Hiatt's albums, for the most part, are hit-and-miss affairs. You get a few
good (at times, great) songs, and a lot of mediocre ones. The CD gets off
to a good start with the single, "Cry Love". Unfortunately, things fall off
quickly after that. The title song isn't too bad, though it bears a
resemblance to Bob Seger. "Good As She Could Be" sounds like Bon Jovi, only
with better lyrics. Though the majority of the CD is a bit lacking, rewards
come to those who wait. The best songs on "Walk On" are toward the end of
the disc.

"Wrote it Down and Burned It", with its brooding groove, is one of the CD's
highlights. The coolest thing on Hiatt's new CD though, is the nine-minute
unlisted bonus track, "Mile High". It's a bluesy, doo-wop song, with a tinge
of "Twin Peaks-style" guitar work thrown in. Even if you're not a John Hiatt
fan, be sure to check these two tunes out. You'll be glad you did. Overall,
"Walk On" isn't as good as his previous studio effort, "Perfectly Good
Guitar", but the songs that are good on here rank among his best.




THE HUSH - Human (Shanachie)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

This is a very unusual CD that is hard to peg.  The Hush might be considered
"alternative," (for all that term is worth) but it might be seen as a dozen
other things, as well.  I'm not sure what to call it.  I'm painfully aware
that musicians hate the notion of labels, but when you're trying to tell
someone about a CD without letting them hear it, labels become necessary.
This time, however, I give up.  I can't do it.

The Hush plays very strange music conducive to fast-paced dreaming.  That's
not to say the music is fast-paced.  It's exotic and easy, with just a hint
of jazz and blues thrown in for flavor.  The music is very cerebral, cramming
a whole lot of thoughts and images into a short block of time.  That's what
makes the dreams cruise along at such a clip.  Sarah-Chanderia's voice is
powerful and dramatic, not to mention versatile.  She can be tough as nails
and withering in the same line.  It took me a few listens to decide, but I
really love her voice.  When keyboardist Lauren Stauber harmonizes, it's a
magic combination.  Derek Bronston's subtle guitar and bass work is just
right for Greg Gonzalez's jazz-flavored drumming.  They have what you would
call "cool chemistry."

With all of these styles at their disposal it's little wonder that they can
pull off covers of Dizzy Gillespie's "A Night In Tunisia" and The Clash's
"Should I Stay Or Should I Go" on the same album.  The latter is certainly
one of the most unusual covers I've ever heard.  It's done as a slow and
anguished blues with some of the most interesting vocal interplay on the
entire CD.  Hard core Clash fans will throw tomatoes.  I'm throwing money.
I think this might be one of those CDs that you will either love or hate.
No middle ground.  One thing for sure--you'll have a strong reaction.  You
just won't know what to call it.



LAIKA AND THE COSMONAUTS - Zero Gravity (Upstart)
By DJ Johnson

In a little under eight years, Laika and the Cosmonauts, Finland's instro
band deluxe, has managed to influence a new generation of musicians.  Zero
Gravity is their 3rd Upstart CD, but it is actually their early recordings.
These songs are taken from vinyl releases called "C'mon, Do The Laika" (1988)
and "Surf's You Right" (1990).  Both of those records have been hunted to
near extinction.  While this won't satisfy hard core record collectors, it
is going to make people who just want to hear the music very very happy.

The music is what it's all about.  Laika is one of the best instro bands
ever to dive into the reverb pool.  They put their Euro spin on tunes like
Dizzy Gillespie's "A Night In Tunisa" (this is the 3rd cover of that song
I've reviewed this month!  What are the odds?) and "Baja," bringing out
elements previously missed by other artists.  It's kind of funny...I've
heard a few people remark that this cover of "Baja" is a bit weak, while I
thought they simply explored the more fragile aspects of the song.  Oh well.

Whereas their two other CDs lean a bit farther toward spy, Zero Gravity is
genuine surf drenched in reverb of the long-tailed variety.  "Surf-Ro-Mania,"
"1'45," "Oahu Luau" and "Point Of No Return" are great surf tunes with riffs
that stick, but the masterpiece is "Surf's You Right."  It kicks in with a
thundering speed-picked guitar ala Dick Dale's "Miserlou," then goes it's
own way toward the Surf Hall Of Fame.  Fans of Laika's spy leanings will
find a few gems here, too, in "Fugitive" and "Fear."  Zero Gravity will
probably be the prefered Laika and the Cosmonauts CD among fans of the
tasty waves, but there's something here for all instro fans. 



LET'S GO BOWLING - Mr. Twist (Moon Ska Records)
By DJ Johnson

It's been a while since we last heard from Let's Go Bowling, but it sure was
worth the wait.  1992's "Music To Bowl By" earned the band a lot of friends,
and I doubt they'll lose many after people hear "Mr. Twist."  Nastier grooves,
funkier horns and just the right amount of attitude.  LGB comes at ska from
more than one angle, which is a welcome change from many of the one-trick
bands operating in the genre today.

"Spy Market" is an instant classic with a psychotic bass line propelling it
along and, of course, that great Hammond sound and sharp-as-knives horn
section.  The title track is a moody R&B mix with some very exotic guitar
noodling in the background.  This is a beautiful track, but the slowdown is
only temporary.  It kicks right into "Cumbia Del Sol," a hoppin' Latin tune
complete with Spanish vocals.  LGB makes it sound Latin and feel ska.  Cool
trick.  The CD flows so well from song to song it almost feels like a live
performance.  LGB's shows are said to be among the most entertaining in ska,
and I can believe it.  At the moment they're touring in the Mid-West and the
South.  Keep an eye out for them.  If the live show is as good as this CD,
you'll want to catch it.



THE McCRACKINS - In On The Yolk  (Shredder)
By The Platterpuss

These guys play the kind of white bread power pop on speed (ala bands like
Screeching Weasel, Vacant Lot and The Mr. T Experience) that I can never
seem to get enough of. 14 tracks and they're all just loaded with oodles of
hooks that'll have you grinnin' from ear to ear as you dance all around your
room. As often as not, their lyrics are kinda on the silly side, singing
about old TV sitcoms, commercials and vegetables, but unlike some bands,
they never get annoying. If fun, mindless poppy punk is the thing that
scratches your itch, this is truly some calomine lotion for the soul. (75
Plum Tree Lane #3,  San Rafael CA 94901) 



MINISTRY - Filthpig (Warner)
Reviewed by Keith Gillard.

Let me begin this review with a disclaimer:  I like industrial music.  I like
noise and pounding rhythms.  I even like bone-crushing guitars.  And I like
Ministry.  But I also like innovation and good songwriting.

I don't really like "Filthpig".

Or rather, I dislike the first half of "Filthpig", but do like the second
half.  The first half the record has such boring arrangements and wimpy drums
that I was prepared to state that the entire record was just one step above
loud elevator music.  But the second half changed all of that.  It makes me
wonder why they chose this track order.  All the boring, weakly-written
tracks are put at the beginning of the record (plus one at the end for good
measure).  If I hadn't been reviewing the record, I might not have listened
past the first four tracks (and I know several people who didn't).

The Bad Side: The first track, "Reload" hits nice and hard very quickly, but
I'm afraid it's style over substance here kids... The title track starts off
with the promise of a cool laid-back groove, but uninspired drumming does
nothing to excite the track further.  The harmonica solo is a nice touch,
though, even if we have heard it before.  "Lava" sounds cool, but the snare
is so wimpy I wonder why they even bothered.  It's just an anemic low-tempo
"NWO".  The adolescent garage band wanking of "Crumbs" should have died with
the '80's.

The Good Side: "Useless", has a good groove, great guitar sounds, and the
falsetto chorus at the end of the track is a fantastic hook. "Gameshow" has
nice vocal delivery and interesting atmospheric sound effects.  "The Fall"
opens with a very cool drum break and features some nice delayed piano.  I
like this piece.  The cover of "Lay Lady Lay" is very nice - I understand why
this was the lead-off single.  It is the freshest-sounding thing on the
album, with an obvious Bauhaus influence.

The last track on the album, "Brick Windows" starts with some very cool
guitar sounds, but unfortunately sounds more like the Bad Side than the Good
Side.  Stale, uninteresting.  What a strange way to frame five good tracks:
surround them by mediocre industrial rock wanking...

Maybe this is a record which would grow on me in time, but after listening to
it twice, I don't think I'm going to put it on much more.  I'll stick with
their earlier work which, after years, somehow still seems fresher and more
interesting than anything on "Filthpig".  I would feel better about this
album if they'd just released the five good songs as an EP, and dropped the
boring backwards-looking material.

Perhaps "Filthpig" wouldn't be so disappointing if it had been released by
someone without the history of Ministry.  None of the brilliance exhibited
in "Jesus Built My Hotrod" is present here.  I wish it was.  "Psalm 69" was
a landmark in industrial music.  I wish "Filthpig" had lived up to my
expectations, but it was marred be being only half good.  What a shame.

	Songwriting:	5/10
	Production:	7/10
	Performance:	5/10
	Overall:	6/10




MOMUS - Slender Sherbet: Classic Songs Revisited (Cherry Red)
Reviewed by Keith Gillard.

I was first introduced to the music of Momus by a CD passed under the desk in
an English lecture:  "Listen to this - you'll love it."  I had never heard of
pop's Tender Pervert before, but that album passed under the desk in English
class forever changed my musical life.

For those of you who don't know Momus, he built a career out of writing songs
about taboo subject matter in the '80's.  You name a taboo - he dealt with it
in a beautiful, flowing, witty way that could make the most repulsive things
seem highly erotic.  In 1989, his song "Hairstyle of the Devil" was chosen by
the Pet Shop Boys as single of the year (and no surprise - it sounded very
Pet Shop).

Well, after a decade of producing some of the most innovative and daring
underground pop ever, with ten albums and two record companies under his
belt, Momus is revisiting and re-working thirteen favourites from the '80's
on "Slender Sherbet" (unfortunately his contract with Creation Records
wouldn't allow him to re-release his '90's material).  But these are not
mere remixes or alternate takes!  These tracks have been completely
rearranged and rerecorded, often VERY different from the originals.  Given
Momus' recent work over the past five years ("The Ultraconformist" excepted,
of course), I expected an upbeat dancey record.  However, Momus once again
takes chances by redoing most of these tracks in a disturbing low key manner.
Although elements of dance (particularly trip-hop) raise their heads here and
there, this is not a dance album.

Highlights:  Incredibly haunting vocoder and Speak'n'Spell work on a
brilliantly detached version of "A Complete History of Sexual Jealousy,
Parts 17-24" (although the reverb is a little much for my liking).  "The
Guitar Lesson" now features real guitar.  Why Momus, a guitar player, used
sampled guitar on the original, I have never been able to figure out.  This
is the way it should always have been!  The arrangement on "The Angels Are
Voyeurs" is wonderfully camp.  The lyrics to this song are among the best
I've ever heard ("God is a tender pervert, and his angels are voyeurs...").
And the new version of "Hairstyle of the Devil" is presented as a ballad,
with plenty of slop factor, centred around acoustic guitar.

As a bonus, particularly for those people who know the original versions of
these tracks, the CD includes three "hidden" tracks, where Momus parodies his
own works.  These tracks include "A Complete History of Penis Envy, Sizes
24-29", and a return of "The Guitar Lesson", which centres this time on the
42-year-old mother instead of the 12-year-old girl.  Much hilarity ensues,
and Momus has the good sense to keep these funny tracks short (90 seconds or
so).

The packaging is great, too.  The cover pays homage to the original "Tender
Pervert" cover...  However, printing all the lyrics (and they are copious)
in a 4 pt font without any line breaks makes them very difficult to read.
My advice:  Just listen closely!

What I'm not so keen on in this album is "I Was a Maoist Intellectual".
Momus sings this song as a character, part-singing, part-shouting,
part-whispering the track.  I understand what he's trying to do here, but
I find it difficult to accept that that is the voice of a Maoist
intellectual.  I'm also not big on the new arrangements of "The Gatecrasher"
or "Hotel Marquis de Sade"...

But that's nit-picking.  The bottom line is that this is a great collection
of (mostly) brilliant new versions of some of the most surprising pop songs
ever written.  I enjoyed this record so much, it makes me wish that Momus
would release new versions of other great classics of his, like "How Do You
Find My Sister?", "Sex For the Disabled", and "Monsters of Love"...  or some
of his brilliant '90's records (which I will be reviewing in reverse order of
release over the next few months).

But then I think, if all Momus did was release new versions of my old
favourites of his, I wouldn't get to hear his new work as he continues to
break down the walls of what can and cannot be done in pop music.

If you are interested in Momus, you can find more about him at
http://www.demon.co.uk/momus .  He runs this site himself, and it contains
all kinds of goodies!


	Songwriting:	10/10
	Production:	8/10
	Performance:	9/10
	Overall:	9/10



NEW YORK SKA-JAZZ ENSEMBLE - Self titled (Moon Ska)
By DJ Johnson

This is a super-group made up of members of The Toasters, Scofflaws and
Skatelites.  They've merged ska and jazz in a way that makes my day.
(Hey, sometimes I need some kicked-back jazz!)  Freddie Reiter (sax) and
Rick Faulkner (trombone), both from The Toasters, sound like they're having
a blast getting their jazz ya-ya's out on these 12 tracks.  Reiter's warm
tone is perfect for tunes like "Harlem Nocturne."  His solo is as emotional
and mysterious as the song itself.  Faulkner is no slouch either, and he
turns in several great performances here, most notably his solo on "Don
Tojo."  Ken Sharf guests on trumpet on that track, and his solo is absolutely
stellar.

Victor Rice's (Scofflaws) bass playing takes center stage on their cover
of Charles Mingus' "Haitian Fight Song."  Let me just say that Victor has
the groove!  His playing is subtle on much of this disc, but always on the
money.  When he does lean into the light for a moment here and there it's
always something tasty.  Devon James, the guitarist from the legendary
Skatelites, does a lot of nice jazz comping throughout, and his ska rhythm
chopping is usually doubled by keyboardist Cary Brown (Scofflaw's).  Drummer
Johnnathan McCain (The Toasters) is rock steady all the way.

There's only one vocal track, and since nothing else on this CD is "the
usual," they went all out and brought in Hepcats Greg Lee, Alex Desert and
Deston Berry to sing Toots and the Maytals' "John & James." It's a soulful
performance.  "Elegy," penned by Faulkner, is beautiful.  It leans a little
closer to the reggae side of the fence than the others.  The final track,
"Midnite Crazies," finds Faulkner and Reiter trading solos back and forth,
eventually joining up for a cool finale.  Y'know, for a side project, these
guys sound amazingly tight and intuitive.  I hope they get time to do some
more. 



ROBERT RICH/B. LUSTMORD - Stalker (Hearts Of Space/Fathom)
Review by coLeSLAw

For those who may be vaguely familiar with Hearts Of Space (and their public
radio show "Music from the Hearts Of Space"), you might want to sit down...
Ok...Comfy?...Good.  The lights go down, the candles are lit, time for
another sonic voyage through all that which is relaxing. On goes the CD
player...

A windy scream erupts from your speakers! There is a low boom, then all is
nearly silent. You are now alone in a dark cave. It's cold, dripping. Eerie
noises seem to reach out and tease you from all angles. (Could we truly be
in the mind of Robert Rich? Where is that sunny warm earthscape from which
we know him so well?)

Yes, he's here, and if you can leave your painstakingly chiseled-in-stone
inhibitions behind, you will come to realize that you are relaxing. The cave
is not cold, it's just a cave you haven't had the courage to explore before.
And what's this? You are accompanied by a second tour guide! B. Lustmord (or
Lustmord or Brian Williams, who until somewhat recently took non-believers
on blindfolded excursions through burning industrial districts).

Inspiration. Knowledge. Emotions. All of these can be passed on if the
teacher is willing and the student is accepting. Andrei Tarkovsky, with his
movie "Stalker", showed our two crafty guides the way into the psychological
zone we now inhabit, and we are following in their footsteps. Everything may
seem a little darker, your footing less stable, but you are safe, your
leaders know the way. Soon you will realize that as unfamiliar as this new
place is, you know it all too well. It has been a part of you from the
beginning of time.



STEVE ROACH - The Magnificent Void (Hearts Of Space/Fathom)
Reviewed by coLeSLAw

Something like a soundtrack to drowning, Steve Roach's newest accomplishment
takes us many fathoms deeper than some would expect from him. Known for his
pioneering leadership in ambient space music, as well as a profound respect
for, and understanding of, the aboriginal culture and their music (and the
deeper meaning behind it all), Roach has shifted once again.

Quite happily for myself, Hearts of Space and some of their most talented
artists are opening up a new channel on the ambient wavelength. Like musical
vision quests (and some of the psychedelics involved) they can be quite hard
to swallow (metaphorically speaking of course) for some. But to those who
believe, the music will take you to a new realm of understanding, or quite
possibly one as old as time that we have simply forgotten we ever knew.

"The Magnificent Void" is such an album. There may be individual song titles
listed here, but this is all one complete and thoroughly involved trip.
Sounds flow in and are swept away by a new wash of something equally
powerful. Waves of mystery splash over a shimmering nothing, and then sink
slowly away. The music is a lot like space. It is a vast emptiness, a
non-substance, yet overwhelmingly complex and mind-numbingly difficult to
perceive as infinite. There is nothing here that you can touch, but you are
touched by everything.

The void is dark. The void is wide. The void is a tense unknown. The void is
magnificent.



THE SCOFFLAWS - Ska In Hi-Fi (Moon Ska)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

The Scofflaws are an outstanding Ska band that favors slightly slower tunes
and hypnotic grooves over the fast and furious style of many other bands.
Not that I have anything against that other style, but a well played slow
groove almost always catches my ear.  When they want to run, they can.
"Spider In My Bed" and "William Shatner" can both incite one to speed-skank,
and the former is definitely one of the highlights of this CD.  

But let's get back to the slow grooves, because that's what really keeps
this CD in my player.  If you want to demonstrate why Ska is one of the
coolest forms of music in the world, play "Nude Beach" for your friends.
The baritone sax stutters out a soulful riff and pulls the band along,
while the bassy Hammond organ pushes.  It's hard to tell who did that sax
part because three guys are credited with baritone sax, but it sounds like
it might Freddie Reiter, who sure keeps busy between this band, The Toasters
and The New York Ska-Jazz Ensemble.  By the way, the tasteful keyboard work
is provided by Cary Brown, who is also in New York Ska-Jazz Ensemble with
Reiter.  Brown lays back through most of this, but put on the headphones
and get into what he's doing.  It's mixed back a ways, but it's tasty.
He cuts loose for a minute at the beginning of "Spider On My Bed," playing
a sultry little radio-soap-opera type riff before all hell breaks loose.

This isn't really a great CD to pop in when you need an energy boost.  There
are plenty of Ska bands out there that can fill that job for you.  This is
the perfect CD for kicking back with at the end of the day.  



THE STAND GT - They're Magically Delicious  (Top Drawer)
By The Platterpuss

Fans of upbeat, catchy punky Pop 'n' Roll that's halfway between the
relative slickness of bands like The Shoes and the melodic-yet-punked-out
sound of bands like The Queers will definitely go for these guys in a
big way. They had one of the best singles of '95 ("Crackle Fan") and, even
though it's not included here, it's readily apparent from these 15 songs
(only 13 are listed) that it was definitely no fluke. Some of my
favorite tracks are "Mudsick", "Paying The Piper" (which really reminds
me of some of The Shoes' better records), "The Wait", "Dragged Across This
Boredom" and "Mary's Favorite Number" but almost all of 'em are top notch.
Occasionally they slow the pace down and drag things out a bit too long
(I believe they're called 'power ballads' but, man, what an oxymoron!)
but most of the time they're right on the money. Bravo! (1912 Franklin Ave.
E.,  Seattle WA 98102) 



SURRENDER TO THE AIR -- Surrender to the Air (Elektra)
By Steve Marshall

This CD is being marketed as a new release by "Phish's Trey Anastasio". In
reality, it is an eclectic collaboration featuring Anastasio and (Phish
drummer) Jon Fishman, along with members of the Sun Ra Orchestra, members
of the Aquarium Rescue Unit, guitarist Marc Ribot, & John Medeski (Medeski,
Martin & Wood).  It's not an album for the casual fan. As much as Phish
improvises in its on-stage performances, this album takes things one step
further. For the most part, there's nothing even vaguely resembling a melody
here.

Surrender to the Air is a free-form jazz album. It's as if the musicians just
went into the studio and played whatever they wanted. Take a bit of early to
mid-'70s Miles Davis material, throw in a touch of Lumpy Gravy, & you'll get
the idea. In terms of musicianship, it's superb.  Fishman is outstanding on
the drum kit, as always. Unfortunately, there isn't any kind of cohesive
melody to tie it all together. There is very little guitar work heard on the
CD, which is a shame given Anastasio's virtuosity on the instrument. The only
time a definite chord progression appears on any of the tracks is on "Out",
the CD's final track.

Unless you're a fan of avant-garde jazz, most people (even Phish fans) will
find Surrender to the Air to be a disappointment. 



VARIOUS...uh...ARTISTS - Golden Throats: Sweethearts Of Rodeo Drive (Rhino)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

   "The horror.  The HORROR!" - Marlon Brando (Apocalypse! Now).

Indeed.  Golden Throats offers something not to be found anywhere else in
the excellent Rhino catalog--a CD that you can write off as a medical expense
if you put it in your medicine cabinet in place of Syrup of Ipecac.  Golden
Throats is a series of CDs that digs up long lost (on purpose) musical
recordings by famous actors.  The first few volumes in this series featured
such sonic tortures as William Shatner's mind-bludgeoning version of "Lucy
In The Sky With Diamonds."  And people bought these CDs!  Why?  I have a
theory about that.  Y'know how you can't help but look at a traffic accident
as you drive by?

The third volume of the series, "Sweethearts Of Rodeo Drive," is a violent,
gory, bloody, horrific 11-car pile-up with body parts all over the road.  Ya
gotta love it.  Leonard "Spockmeister" Nimoy's take on "I Walk The Line"
would be the most horrible country performance you ever heard if this CD
didn't have 11 or 12 other tracks in hot pursuit of that crown.  Goldie Hawn
sings "I'll Be Your Baby Tonight," and I'm not going to pass judgement on
that one because Goldie helped me through puberty, albeit without her actual
knowledge or participation. The rest of these bozos, however, are fair game!

What possible reason is there for buying this collection of country miscues?
Because even the dullest GOP fundraiser could be livened up with just one
hilarious track!  Try to keep a straight face as Walter Brennan talks his
way through "Cool Water," managing to screw up the rhythm to the point where
the backup singers are a good five seconds behind him most of the way.  Try
not to spit out your martini as Buddy "Uncle Jed" Ebsen mangles "Your Cheatin'
Heart" or Jack Palance hams his way through "The Green Green Grass Of Home."
Poor sweet Carol Channing probably wishes she'd never recorded "Back Street
Affair," and ya know what?  She's not alone.  Slim Pickens' version of Guy
Clark's "Desperados Waiting For A Train" can't even be described.  It's just
too horrible.  And still, he's not the worst.

That honor goes to Rod McKuen, who says he was a poet and important American
cultural icon.  Yeah, uh huh.  His dismemberment of Frankie Laine's classic,
"Mule Train," is the ultimate example of my car wreck theory.  I confess--I
actually listened to this track twice in a row.  I just had to see if I was
imagining it the first time.  No such luck, pardner.  Amidst cracking whips
and other interesting sound effects, any one of which had a better harmonic
quality than McKuen's voice, the phony-poet shouted and grunted and rambled
his way through the song in such a hysterical and ugly manner that I can't
even listen to Laine's original anymore!  WARNING: DO NOT PLAY THIS TRACK AT
PARTIES UNLESS IT'S LATE AND NOBODY WILL LEAVE!

The winner of the "Historical Significance Award" is Wink Martindale for his
mucho uglissimo reading of "Peace In The Valley."  Why is it important?
Because it's a rare look at just how talentless one has to be in order to
find his way into a career as a game show host.  Another track of interest is
"Games People Play," by Jim "Gomer" Nabors.  Of all the performances in this
collection, his is the only one that's delivered with a strong, confident and
well-trained singing voice.  But see...the problem is...Well, remember that
girl in junior high school who always belted out "My Country Tis Of Thee"
at the top of her lungs in a really impressive vibrato?  Didn't you just want
her dead?  Same thing with ol' Gomer.  The liner notes say people actually
bought his records.  I can't imagine.

So let's recap - Why should Golden Throats 3 sell a single copy?  Because it's
a lot of fun to listen to these silly actors trying to show how talented they
are when they really have no clue about music at all.  And because your
parties will be a lot of laughs from now on.  And because Goldie's on the
cover in a bikini.  The nice folks at Rhino Records have a sadistic sense
of humor, I'm tellin' ya.



VARIOUS ARTISTS - Go Ska Go (Heartbeat Records)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Outstanding roots-ska from one of the coolest labels in the world.  Heartbeat
is an imprint of Rounder Records dedicated to preserving reggae and ska
heritage.  This is a collection of 19 songs from ska's defining era, the
60s.  

Like the reggae of the period, ska drew heavily on Detroit and Memphis soul
styles.  There's a lot of that here, augmented by the traditional ska beats
and stabbing percussive saxaphones.  There's one track that has me a bit
curious -- a note for note copy of The Four Top's "It's The Same Old Song"
with different lyrics.  Do you see the irony in this?  Yeah, it's the same
old song, but in this case it's called "Stop Making Love," and it's done by
The Gaylads.  I'm not sure who ripped who off...but I think the Top's song
was written by Holland/Dozier/Holland.  No matter.

Ska of this era could float you away just as well as reggae could, and proof
of this is waiting on track 11, "Roll On Sweet Don" by Don Drummond and
Roland Alphonso.  An instrumental with a medium tempo, it holds your interest
without changing chords once.  Walking bass, guitar way back in the mix,
horns carrying the haunting melody...this is dreamy stuff on a par with The
Upsetters' "Scratch Walking." Another standout track is "Simmer Down" by Bob
Marley and the Wailers.  I'd somehow managed to miss this track until now.
I'd only heard it done as a cover by The Mighty Mighty Boss-Tones.  Sublime
stuff, this.

These tracks by Toots & the Maytals, The Charmers, Jackie Opal, Clue J & his
Blues Blasters and others might be considered subdued by today's ska
standards, but what do you expect?  Ska's been blended with punk on one side
and jazz-big band on the other until you don't know where one ends and the
next begins.  Which is cool, but it's sure nice to kick back and spend an
hour soaking up the historic stuff.  And that's about what this is...Close
to an hour of great tracks by some of the most influential artists from ska's
most influential period.



VARIOUS ARTISTS - It Came From Memphis (Upstart)
By DJ Johnson

This is the CD counterpart to a book by Robert Gordon, and I really wanted
to get that book and review the two together.  To make a long story short,
it didn't happen.  So here's a review of the CD from the viewpoint of someone
who hasn't got a clue as to why each song was selected.  

This CD is a blast to listen to if you're a fan of many genres of music.
Y'got yer blues, yer funk, yer psych, yer soul, yer strangeness...The
only thing you don't got is yer usual.  There's nothing usual here at all.
In fact, this has to be one of the oddest collections of music I've ever
heard, which is just one of the reasons I recommend it so highly.

The CD (and presumably the book) is what it is because it's programmed the
way a 1950's DJ named Dewey Phillips would have programmed it.  As the
liner notes say, "Dewey sequenced his radio show not by genre, not by artist
or beats per minute or any `logical' way: Dewey sequenced his show by feel.
He smashed genres against each other, the fallout creating a spirit, an
entity that transcended the actual songs."  Mud Boy and the Neutrons' "Money
Talks" starts the music off with a bluesy feel that seems close to "normal"
until Mud Boy goes into his demented rap toward the end.  Moses Williams
follows with a back-porch blues recording of "Which Way Did My Baby Go."
It's just Moses' voice, stomping foot and...and...I don't know what stringed
instrument he's using.  It sounds like a bandsaw blade with a coffee can for
a resonator!  It's also one of the gutsiest blues recordings I've ever heard.
There's an R&B track called "Frank, This Is It" by Cliff Jackson and Jellean
Delk with the Naturals that almost takes the prize for weirdness.  Twisted
R&B. 2:29 of a woman telling a man he's history while the man sobs
uncontrollably in the background.  Ross Johnson's "Wet Bar" is a one of those
songs you feel guilty for laughing at.  His woman left because of his
drinking problem.  He begs her to come back and talk about it...over drinks.

It gets stranger!  Psychedelia like "Rocket Ship Rocket Ship" by Drive Inn
Danny and "Batarang" by The Avengers sets you up for the absolutely bizarre
"Story Of My Life," sung in a completely different key than the music by
Lesa Aldridge.  Guess what smashes into that one!  A blues/gospel song
performed by a drum & fife corp.  Of COURSE I'm serious.  Who could make
that up?  Big Ass Truck's "I'm A Ram" adds a nice touch of funk to this
amazing mix of genres.  

Amongst all the strangeness on this CD there sits a beautiful and perfect
recording of Sid Selvidge singing "Boll Weevil" with no instrumental
accompaniment.  This one is pure goose-bump material.  Any musician who did
anything this fine would be able to die happy and fulfilled.

Without the book to use as a tour guide, I got happily lost in this music.
The final track is a beautiful synth piece, "Selections From Symphony # 4,
Bonnie Prince Charlie" by William Eggleston.  As I drifted on the music,
I realized I'm not the type of person who takes guided tours when I travel
anyway.  I like to find stuff by accident.  Whether you go by the book or
fly blind, this is a trip worth taking. 



VARIOUS ARTISTS - Mrs. Pottinger's High Note and Gayfeet Label Musical
Feast (Heartbeat Records)
By DJ Johnson

Sonia Pottinger is a legendary figure in reggae and ska history.  She ran the
Tip-Top Record Shop on Orange Street in Jamaica, where she had a recording
studio in the back room.  People loved to record there because a) she knew
her stuff and b) there was an organ in the studio that had a sweeter-than-wine
sound.  This is a collection of early records cut in that studio.  Teddy and
the Conquerors' "Home Bound," The Melodians' "Little Nut Tree" and The
Gaylads' "It's Hard To Confess" are all songs with incredible vocal harmony
work and melodies you can't get out of your head.  Mrs. Pottinger had an
natural feel for vocals, as any of the above songs will prove, and her early
productions usually started there and then worked downward toward the groove.
This made for many hit records with melting harmonies and subtle float-away
grooves.

Among the 18 tracks you'll find a few oddities, like Errol Dunkley's "You'll
Never Know," which is a cover of The Beatles "I'll Be Back" played very
slowly with a trumpet answering the ponderous vocal. Stranger Cole and
Patsy's "Down By The Trainline" features Jamaican folk drumming behind the
powerful vocal harmonies. There's also an interesting early look at a future
star -- Judy Mowatt.  Her "I Shall Sing" was recorded under the name Juliann
because she was still under contract to Federal Records as a member of The
Gaylets.  She, of course, went on to bigger and better things as a member
of the I-Threes (Bob Marley's backing vocalists) and as a solo artist.

Singling out one track from this CD is an impossible task, but I think I 
could narrow it down to two.  "Swing and Dine" by The Melodians is brilliant.
If Motown had released this, it would have been #1 with a bullet in America.
The Melodians had the most beautiful harmonies in the biz, in my opinion, and
you get two of their most impressive tracks on this CD. (The other is the
aforementioned "Little Nut Tree.")  And then there's Ken Boothe's "Say You,"
which contains a vocal track with harmonies so beautiful it can bring tears
to your eyes.

The sound on this CD is phenomenal considering the era.  It was all taken
from the original master tapes, which puts it head and shoulders above the
average roots-reggae collection.  You get to hear it the way it was meant
to be heard.  This is a terrific compilation. 



VARIOUS ARTISTS -- Mr. Wrong (Hollywood Records)
By Steve Marshall

This is one of those CDs that you pick up in the store, think to yourself
that it could be cool, then you get it home & put it in the CD player, and
wonder why you wasted your money. The soundtrack to Mr. Wrong boasts a fairly
"big-name" cast of performers, for the most part, covering songs from the
late '70's & early '80's. There are a few original songs thrown in by Joan
Osborne, Shawn Colvin, and Ben Folds Five.

Scattered among the tracks on the CD, you'll find such insipid covers as Amy
Grant doing "The Things We Do For Love"; the Joe Tex classic, "I Gotcha",
destroyed by Sophie B. Hawkins; and Joan Jett and The Blackhearts' awful
version of "Love Stinks". The worst part about the Joan Jett track is that
it isn't even in the movie!  Why put it on the CD? If that wasn't enough for
you, you can put on Chris Issak's rendition of "I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry".
If you make it all the way through this one, you'll be crying.

The only redeeming quality of the CD is the inclusion of Queen's "Crazy
Little Thing Called Love". Not even Queen can save this one though. Check
out the movie, but skip the soundtrack.



VARIOUS ARTISTS -- Things Go Better With Coke (Distortions Records)
By Steve Marshall

Long before the days of multi-million dollar deals for recording artists,
the groups on top of the charts would record radio commercials for various
sponsors.  Distortions Records has assembled a collection of 60 Coca-Cola
commercials recorded between 1965 and 1969 by some of the most popular
artists of the era. Some of the acts on the CD are The Bee Gees, The Moody
Blues, Tom Jones, Golden Earring, The Easy Beats, Left Banke, The Box Tops,
Roy Orbison, Nancy Sinatra, American Breed, Gary Lewis & the Playboys, The
Everly Brothers, Vanilla Fudge, Neil Diamond, and The Supremes. The only
other group I can think of that did Coke commercials around this time that's
not represented here is The Who.

Things Go Better With Coke isn't something that you'll listen to over and
over again, but it definitely makes an interesting disc to add to your CD
collection. Especially if you're a fan of any of the artists here, most of
whom contribute two or three commercials each.  Distortions Records is an
independent label based in Bala-Cynwyd, PA, specializing mainly in garage,
punk & psychedelic bands. The CD can be ordered for $14.00 (plus $2.50
shipping) via mail-order from Distortions Records  PO Box 1122 Bala-Cynwyd,
PA 19004.  




THE VICE BARONS - Friends In Low Places  (Nitro/Demolition Derby)
By The Platterpuss

I'm not always a real big fan of strictly surf/instrumental bands as many
of 'em start to put me right to sleep after about half a dozen songs. Most
of the time they lack the creativity or flat out ballsiness to maintain my
interest for a whole set. Happily, these guys are a major exception to the
rule as this disc definitely manages to keep the excitment level way up
there throughout all of its 14 songs. One of the things I like about them
is that they are not strictly a suf band. While they certainly have their
share of reverb and twangy guitars there are some other elements in there
as well. On a few tracks such as "Shark Face Suzy", "Buzzz" and "Radiant"
there's an organ wailing away to give it a mid-60s garage feel, something
which, in my book at least, is always a good thing. If these guys are half
the band live that they are on this disc, I bet they must be total dynamite.
(c/o Kris Vermuth, Tervuursesteenweg 1h, 1820 Perk, BELGIUM)



THE WOODIES - Demo tape
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Rick Escobar and his buddies are well known in the instro surf scene.
They're one of The Mermen's favorite opening bands and the crowd reaction
is always excellent.  That's because The Woodies understand the trad sound.
They're charter members of The Church Of The 'verb.  So why aren't they
signed to a label?  I'm not positive, but I think it might be because labels
are looking for amazing guitar solos in this genre.  Rick Escobar takes a
different approach.  He writes strong rhythmic tunes with simple melodies
instead of building showcases for his guitar talents.  I have no doubt that
Rick could shred with the best of 'em, but just like Steve Miller recorded
some of the most memorable songs of the 70s (most of them without solos!)
Rick writes memorable instro tracks built on rhythm.  Perhaps labels aren't
willing to chance it.  I think that's a shame.  This is a catchy batch of
songs.  "The Swami" mixes surf and raga with intoxicating results. "Agent
Woodrow" shows they can do the spy thing.  There are 15 songs on this tape
and only 4 covers!  That tells you something right there. Rick's a writer,
and these are great songs.



FRANK ZAPPA -- The Lost Episodes (Rykodisc)
By Steve Marshall

One of the last projects Frank Zappa worked on before he died was a
collection of his favorite rarities and outtakes. The Lost Episodes is
a new collection of unreleased material, personally selected by Zappa
himself. Frank spent 18 months sporadically working on the track lineup
for the CD. After several rejected attempts, the new CD contains 30
tracks that met with his approval.

Zappa fans are in for a real treat with The Lost Episodes. Besides the
52-page booklet, the CD contains material dating back to the late 1950's
when Frank played drums in The Blackouts. On one of the earlier tracks,
"Lost in a Whirlpool", you hear a young Zappa on lead guitar (he'd only
been playing the instrument for about six months), along with his brother
Bobby on rhythm. The song also features the vocal debut of the
yet-to-be-christened Captain Beefheart, Don Van Vliet.

The CD includes FZ's first orchestral performance at Mt. St. Mary's College
in 1963, and several rare tracks from Pal Studios (later purchased by Zappa
and named "Studio Z"). Some of the most interesting (and often humorous)
cuts on the CD are the studio banter recorded over the years. "The Dick Kunk
Story" is classic. Anyone who's ever heard Spike Jones will appreciate "The
Big Squeeze", originally the music to a 1967 Luden's cough drop commercial.

The Lost Episodes isn't just fun and games, though. One of the many musical
highlights is a version of "Wonderful Wino" left over from the Over-Nite
Sensation / Apostrophe(') sessions, with manic vocals by Ricky Lancelotti.
"RDNZL" (presented here in its original form) features a fierce solo from
Jean-Luc Ponty. There is an instrumental version of "Inca Roads", predating
its release on One Size Fits All by three years. It proves that even before
vocals were added, Zappa's compositions could stand on their own as
instrumental pieces.

Also included on the CD is the pre-single mix of "I Don't Wanna Get Drafted".
Possibly the most interesting thing on The Lost Episodes is the final track,
the first recorded version of "Sharleena." The 12-minute version of the song
features vocals and an incredible violin solo by Don "Sugar Cane" Harris, and
a lengthy and intense solo by Zappa himself. The Lost Episodes is a tribute
to the musicians he's worked with over the years, and the many people who
influenced his life.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


POLITICAL PLAYBOOK: BE SURE TO WEAR A HELMET...
by Shaun Dale 


"Jesus! Where will it end? How low do you have to stoop in this
 country to be President?"  - Dr. Hunter S. Thompson 

Get ready to find out.  

Sen. Robert Dole, (R-Kansas), may have risen to extraordinary heights of 
courage while serving the country as a member of the 10th Mountain 
Division in Italy, and in his recovery from permanently disabling war 
wounds, but he has never hesitated to stoop in service to his party or 
his unbridled personal ambition.  

Described as "my doberman" by Richard Nixon during his tenure as Republican
National Committee Chair, and nominated for Vice President in 1972 as Gerald
Ford's designated hatchet man, Dole's ruthlessness as a candidate is a
quality matched only by his cynicism as a Senator.  Not satisfied with
attacks on his Democratic opponents, Dole has been unrestrained over the
years in his open disdain for Reagan's fabled 11th Commandment, "Thou shalt
not speak ill of thy fellow Republican."  From his famous New Hampshire
outburst in 1988 (instructing reporters to "Tell George Bush to stop lying
about my record!") to the million dollars plus that he spent on negative
"push poll" telephone campaigns against his primary opponents this year,
Dole's willingness to go for the political jugular has proven to be a
genuinely non-partisan trait.

He doesn't reserve his wrath for fellow politicians, though. Unruly audiences
can get a taste as well.  As a Vice Presidential candidate, he told one
audience that he deemed insufficiently respectful "I hope you're on his side.
We don't want you on our side...Just shut up..."  But strap on your helmets
and get a strong grip on the safety rail, folks, 'cause you ain't seen
nothing yet.

          * THE SENATOR, THE SNAKE AND A BUCKET FULL OF CASH *

Dole has locked up the prize that's eluded him for years - the nomination 
of his party for the White House - and he's been rehearsing that trip down
Pennsylvania Avenue for a long time. At 72, he knows this is his last
shot. He wants this election bad. Bad enough to do anything, say anything
and be anything he thinks will advance his effort.  Willing to pander to
any interest, he told one Republican audience, "If you want me to be
Ronald Reagan, I'll be Ronald Reagan." Of course, Republicans know him
best, so he probably had good reason to think they wouldn't want him to be
Bob Dole.  

What does all this portend for the fall campaign? A good indication can
be had by looking at the recent activities of his New York Campaign Chair, 
Al "the Reptile" D'Amato - also Chair of the Senate Banking Committee by 
the grace of God and the Senate Majority Leader.  If you've been in a 
cave for the last few months you may have missed Senator "Not Indicted Yet" 
D'Amato's ceaseless quest for some good reason to keep the Whitewater 
investigations in his committee alive. This is a clearcut case of a 
Senate committee being turned into an opposition research tool for a 
Republican Presidential campaign - it's gone on longer and cost more
than, for instance, either Watergate or the Iran-Contra investigations,
without producing a single allegation strong enough to produce a charge,
let alone an indictment, of an illegal act by the President.  

But Sen. Sleaze got his committee, started his "investigation," delivered 
every New York delegate to his boss and...and what? A cabinet seat? 
Supreme Court robes? What won't Dole reward him with for such loyal 
service?  

Of course, Dole carries some baggage of his own. It would be wrong to 
call him a wholly owned subsidiary of the Archer Daniels Midland Company, 
but only because the $270,000 or so they've given him is just a fraction 
of the special interest slop that has filled his trough. Not even the biggest
fraction, for that matter. Pride of first place goes to the Gallo winery
family, with $381,000 in direct contributions and nearly a million more to
foundations and PACs established by Dole.  Of course, ADM made up some of
the slack with a million dollar check to the American Red Cross, whose
Chief Executive Officer just happens to be Dole's wife, Elizabeth.  

   * "I DON'T HAVE A RESUME, I HAVE A RECORD." - BOB DOLE *

Dole's voting record as a Senator has some interesting highlights, too. 
Just take a look at the ratings of some of the major interest groups in 
recent years. Though he likes to pose as a moderate deal maker, more
interested in getting things done than waging idealogical battle, his
record shows up some gaping holes in that costume.  

Dole has voted 100% with groups such as the Christian Coalition, the US 
Chamber of Commerce, the American Conservative Union and the National Rifle 
Association. 

Moderate indeed.  

Maybe he averages in the 0% record with groups like the National 
Education Association, the AFL-CIO, the League of Conservation Voters and 
the National Council of Senior Citizens to come up with a "moderate" 
average.  

(In researching Dole's votes, the most shocking bit to me was his 0% 
record on veteran's issues tracked by the Vietnam Veterans of America.  
One point of credit I have always felt he deserved was his service to his 
country. His apparent abandonment of the vets of the next generation seems
a curious contradiction to his pride in his own service record.) 

              * A CAMPAIGN ABOUT CHARACTER *
              
Dole has promised that this will be a campaign about character, and what a
cast of characters we have.  

D'Amato's inability to find substantial charges aside, the Whitewater 
case has at least shown Bill and Hill to be no more or less than your 
typical materialistic yuppies. That's not a sin, or even a crime, but it 
does seem at odds with the persona that Clinton has so carefully crafted 
over the years.  

Of course, we all know about the "bimbo factor." Again, the inability to 
keep it zipped up isn't unique among Americans, or even American 
Presidents, but it still disturbs some voters. 

I count myself among those who are kind of glad that there's finally
someone in the White House who smoked pot and dodged the draft - it adds a
certain generational human touch - but I'd feel better if he'd admit that
he enjoyed that first hit, even if it made him choke a bit.  (On the other
hand, Al Gore inhaled and it didn't seem to do him much good...)

Ultimately, though, there seem to be three camps on the questions of
Clinton's character. His supporters tend to feel that they reveal him as a
kind of regular guy who has shared some of the foibles of his generation.
His opponents find every behavioral glitch as clear evidence that he's a
libertine scoundrel unfit to be taken out in mixed company.  

Most folks, though, don't seem to care much as long as the economy seems 
to be growing and their rent is paid.  

On the other side, Bob Dole. A mean, old, greedy idealogue.  

Helluva choice, huh?  

Bill "I feel your pain" Clinton 
v. 
Bob "Pain? You don't know anything about pain. I'll show you pain" Dole.  

Fasten your seatbelt and try to get a window seat.  

It's gonna be fun.


----------------------------------------------------------------------------
                              COLUMNS!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------
BETWEEN ZERO AND ONE: Survey Says...
by Steven Leith

Going to the polls once meant voting, now it means answering questions asked
by a  pollster.  Does the art of polling elevate democracy or debase
politicians?  I will give you my answer right here, right now and I won't
wait to hear what the polls have to say about it.

We are told that polls are merely a means to find out what people really
want.  Polling came into its own under the name market survey which rose to
prominence with the rise of Madison Avenue. The survey was how a company
would decide what new product to make, package and sell.  After several
years of this the wise men of Madison Avenue realized that you could use
the survey to create a need for a product.

Thus was born the political poll.   The ideal of the political poll is not
to find out what is on the minds of the citizenry, but to get the citizens
to see that all their neighbors believe such and so forth so they would be
stupid to believe otherwise.  A very effective tool to use with primates.

Sticking together is a trait that is selected for in our species.  If the
desire to be in the majority on any topic is not genetic it is at least
cultural.  Armed with the right question a poll can create a sense of common
ground and group cohesion where none existed.  A poll may not be an effective
device for governing a state, but it is the ultimate device for manufacturing
the consent of the governed.

For the sake of argument lets assume that the politicians really care what
the masses are thinking.  Lets go on to assume that polling helps the
politician find out what the majority of the public are thinking.  Now
assume that all this polling is done in the digital world and data streams
in real-time.   Will that usher in a brave new world of democratic bliss?

No!   A politician that is jacked into cyberspace and has access to real-time
updates about the current whim of the public would, by definition, be the
biggest whore since Moll Flanders. The ship of state would be nearly
rudderless, blown by the ever changing winds of popular whim.  No long term
programs could be followed to conclusion.  Anyone in control of the media
would run the country.

Yes, the Net can allow people to exchange ideas in vastly more intricate
patterns.  That is the basis of democratic theory, but when the medium for
exchange of ideas becomes the vehicle for making law, then a line has been
crossed.

In a real-time cyber-polling world the morality of the majority can instantly
become law.  The buffer our cumbersome law-making machinery affords us, by
absorbing some of the seesaw swings of mass mood, can not be counted on to
protect the individual from the tyranny of the electronically polled majority.


The pundits and their electronic democracy not withstanding,  I see the rise
of instant polls and electronic voting to be the harbinger of a cowardly new
world.  A world where no one has to stand apart from the herd.  A world where
standing alone is instant political suicide.

Then again, it is unlikely that polls will ever be used to really find out
what we want.  Rather they will continue to be used to get use to believe
that everyone who counts believes the same as we do.


       *** OFFICIAL ZERO ONE POLL ***

I think polls are a useless waste of time and I:

1) Always read them, especially from USA today and Time
2) Wouldn't read one even if  I was trapped in an elevator with Bob Dole
3) Make up fake polls and quote percentages to baffle people

When I hear that a majority favors a particular topic I:

1) Suspect the topic is unimportant
2) Suspect the poll is biased
3) Suspect a CIA conspiracy 

When I am approached by a Pollster on the street I:

1) Answer their questions cheerfully and honestly
2) Answer their questions grudgingly and lie through my teeth
3) Verbally harass them until the police are summoned 

If you had to vote today for the President of a post-modern
survey ruled United States who would you vote for:

1) Jay Leno
2) David Letterman
3) Max Headroom

Disclaimer: If you think I'm going to tally this survey you really missed
the point.


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

PHIL'S GARAGE 9603
By Phil Dirt

IN THE BEGINNING, THERE WAS DIRT...

Let me tell you how I got hooked on surf. I was an above average intelligence
failure-in-the-cookie-cutter-school white kid stuck in a middle class
dysfunctional family, lured by the tribal nature of Rhythm Blues (Bo Diddley),
the brawling ethos of Rockabilly (Ronnie Hawkins), the gut-punching kick
drums of Frank Guida's Norfolk Rock N Roll (U. S. Bonds), and the few rockin'
instros of the late fifties and early sixties (Link Wray, Jody Reynolds,
Johnny and the Hurricanes).  I was the kid on my block that made incredibly
sculptured custom car models, made my own bicycle suspension system with
which I could do almost block-long wheelies, and crafted a skate board from
my old skates and a piece of surfboard shaped plywood.

I began my love affair with radio on a crystal set listening to KXRX, KLOK
(both San Jose) and KGO (San Francisco).  I was among the few who listened
to KGO when they went Top 40 for a few weeks in the late fifties, using a
vote-for-your-favorite-star-and-we'll-play him/her-all-weekend promotion to
gain attention.  This backfired of course when a Stanford fraternity stuffed
the ballot box with nominations for Enrico Caruso, whom they played for an
entire weekend before giving up the ghost.  You should have heard the begging
on the air by the jox!

I inherited our family's obsolete big radio console, and began to listen
while I was supposed to be doing my homework.  I noticed that I could listen
to stations outside the Bay Area, and that they played stuff KYA (San
Francisco), KEWB (Oakland), KOBY (San Mateo?), and KLIV (San Jose) didn't
play.  First it was the obvious Southern California stations...KFWB (Los
Angeles), KRLA (Pasadena), KHJ (Los Angeles), border bandits XERB & XERF,
and from the valley, KMEN (San Bernardino) and KAFY (Bakersfield).  Then,
there were the Central Valley stations KSTN and KJOY (both Stockton) , plus
KMAK (Fresno).  I also frequented KDON (Salinas).  Soon, I noticed that the
later at night it got, the farther away I could listen...WLS (Chicago), and
the coolest of the Canadians, CJOC (Lethbridge, Alberta) were regular stops
on my dial.  I remember hearing the Checkers "Blue Star" for the first time
on CJOC, and to this day, I want a copy!

One night, I was listening to KFWB, and I heard this monster guitar record
called "Surf Beat".  Then there were more...and KRLA picked it up too.
Suddenly, within six months, KSTN, KLIV, KRLA, KFWB, KMAK, KHJ, and KJOY were
flooding this new surf sound into me.  This stuff oozed raw energy.  It had
the edge of Link Wray's "Rumble" "Jack The Ripper", and the most incredible
sound. There were no stupid words about Pat Boone's acne love life, and there
was this whole escape to a better fun filled life. It was not the white-bread
British instro thing from the Shadows.  This was rock n' roll! The guitar was
king, and the horns fell to a support role. Hooray!

My adolescent anger, my fears, my frustrations, all seemed counterpointed by
this energetic music.  Suddenly, I felt connected.

The thing is, those feelings have never left.  No matter how many changes
surf has gone through, it's always had that connection for me.  I even
flirted with trying to like The Beach Boys and Jan Dean to be in with the
cool dudes and dudettes, but it was always the real thing that I actually
spent money on.

I was so addicted and it was so hard to find in the record stores that I made
a deal with Frank Compoy who owned Record City in the Willow Glenn district
of San Jose. The deal was, if he'd buy a surf instrumental, I'd buy it from
him. Every Saturday morning, I rode my bike for an hour and a half one way
from my house in Cupertino to his store.  He'd give me a bonus of the KFWB,
KEWB, KYA, KHJ, and KRLA surveys he'd get.  Then, I'd ride another half hour
to downtown San Jose and stop in at Discorama, the Mexican record store on
First street where I was the only white kid in the store.  There, I'd
sometimes find those wonderful East LA records by Thee Midnighters and
Cannibal & the Headhunters, the Sevilles, or Chan Romero.  That was my other
love then, that and the real R&B before the spit polish of Motown stole the
raw energy right out of it.  I used to love artists like G. L. Crocket, Roger
Collins, US Bonds, and Ray Charles (that live album still RULES).

Once I got my drivers license, I started hanging out with Squeaky Martin, the
overnight jock at KLIV.  He'd let me do some segues, answer phones, and go
through the junk barrel. What's the junk barrel? KLIV had two fifty gallon
cardboard barrels they'd fill periodically with the singles they didn't add.
That's where I first discovered the Fender Four, the Sonics, Rocky Jenkins
Echo Four, the Torquays, the Preps, the Uniques, the Pretty Things, the Dave
Heenan Set, Dave Myers and the Surftones "Gear", and many other great surf
punk unknowns. It would take several hours once a month to go through these
barrels, but what a gold mine!

I've never lost the thrill of the hunt, sometimes more significant than the
find.  So now you know who I am at my core.

I host "Surf's Up!" on KFJC 89.7 FM in the San Francisco Bay Area Saturday
nights at 7 PM.  I have been recording bands since my first session in 1966
with the Van Slyke, and my most recent with Agent Orange and Brazil 2001
live at KFJC on March 9th.  Visit me on my web page at
http://www.cygnus.com/kfjc/surf/

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

SHARP POINTED STICK AWARD
By DJ Johnson

We have two individuals and one company to stick it to this month, so let's
get right to it.  We start with Northwest Cable Advertising in Seattle,
Washington, a company that does something called "cross network advertising."
If you're watching channel 2, they show you commercials for shows to be seen
on channel 3.  Presumably, somebody at that company pays attention to what
channel 2 is showing and decides if the commercial is appropriate for those
viewers to see.  So a big ol' sharp pointed stick to whoever it was who
played a TNT commercial for the mini-series "Andersonville" around noontime
on Nikelodian one recent weekday.

For those of you who don't have kids and have never thought about these
things, let me point out that anything before 3pm on a weekday on a childrens'
network is probably being seen by kids 5 and under because everyone else is
in school.  There I sat with my five year old daughter, Karlie, who is going
through some rough times dealing with the concepts of death and suffering.
I was performing my duty as a responsible parent by watching a good non-
threatening show with her.  And then the commercial came on.  Before I could
grab either the remote or Karlie, she witnessed a mass-hanging.  First thing
in the damned commercial.  8 or 9 hooded victims dropping through a trap door
and snapping at the ends of the ropes.  A phone call to Nikelodian resulted
in my being pointed to my local cable company.  A call to them got me pointed
to the ad company in question.  A rep from the company told me it was a
mistake, plain and simple.  We all know mistakes happen, and I appreciate her
honesty.  Still, this particular "mistake" was huge, in my opinion, so for
whoever made it, here's a sharp pointed stick for your trophy case, if you
know what I mean.  My daughter won't sleep any better for it, but I will.

Next, we have a pair of North Carolina politicians who have been sucking
shoe polish of late.  First we offer a belated award to Jesse Helms.  I
have heard a great many Jesse'isms and all have been very funny, but I must
have missed this one and only heard it long after the fact.  Since the
Sharp Pointed Stick Award has no statute of limitations, he's fair game.
Jesse said...in PUBLIC, mind you...that AIDS is caught through "deliberate,
disgusting, revolting conduct."  If that's the case, Jesse, I hope for your
sake that you have damned good medical insurance.  Here's your sharp pointed
stick statuette.  It ain't art, Jess, but it's functional.

Hot on the heel's heels is US Rep. Frederick Heineman who opened his mouth
to reporters just long enough to show how "in touch" he is with his
constituents.  He defined "middle class families" as "those whose income is
between $300,000 and $700,000 per year."  This is a man who casts important
votes on behalf of people he obviously knows nothing about.  This is the
danger of having rich politicians making decisions for us.  This is why
Steve Forbes would have been a terrifying President.  Oh well, if they run
him out of office he won't go hungry.  He's displayed a remarkable aptitude
for an exciting career buying screws, washers and toilet seats for the
Pentagon.

Dishonorable mention goes to a pair of robbers in Pittsburgh who walked
in to the bank and pulled their heist sans-masks.  The pictures from the
security cameras couldn't have been better if they'd posed in a studio.
Why the lack of precaution?  Okay, I promise I'm not making this up: they
had rubbed lemon juice on their faces in the belief that it would cause
the pictures to come out blurry.  No word yet as to where they got that
idea.  These are probably the same guys who are now falling for the "bend
over and pick up the liquid soap before it runs down the drain" trick every
day in the joint.

That wraps it up for this month.  If you would like to receive a Sharp Pointed
Stick award or you know somebody who should receive one, please send e-mail
to moonbaby@serv.net with a detailed description of the deserving atrocity.
But PLEASE don't perform an atrocity simply to get the award.  This isn't
America's Funniest Home Videos, y'know.


=============================================================================
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             Random stuff for your entertainment.  Happy scrolling!




A man had just gone to pick up the new car he had ordered. This was a
state-of-the-art vehicle, with computerized everything. When the
salesman was showing the man where all the controls were located, the
man became exasperated because he couldn't find the controls for the
radio.

The salesman laughed and said, "There are no controls. The radio
operates by voice recognition. Watch this: I think we'll listen to
classical."

Suddenly, the sound of a Mozart symphony filled the car.

Then the salesman said, "Blues" and they were listening to B.B.
King.

The man who had bought the car was very impressed and drove off
the lot in a great mood. He was amazed by his radio and kept changing
the stations.

"Jazz," the man said, and he was instantly listening to Charlie
Parker. 

"Disco" he said, and that produced K.C. and the Sunshine Band.

The man kept this up for some time, tuning in to every kind of
music imaginable just by asking for it. In fact, he was so enthralled
that he wasn't really paying attention to the road. Suddenly, another
driver cut him off. 

Without thinking, the man yelled, "Asshole!" and the next thing
he knew, he was listening to Rush Limbaugh.

                             - * -
      
"I told 'em, "Let's learn more original songs and try and get a record
contract." And the sax player, a guy named Davy Coronado -- it was his
group -- he says, "You can't do that. The minute you start playing original
music you'll get fired from these clubs." And he was right. We learned
original music and we got fired...and fired and fired and fired."

   - Frank Zappa (discussing his early days with The Mothers Of Invention.)


                             - * -


Q: How many Republicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A: Four hundred and sixty-two:
Twelve to investigate Clinton's involvement in the failure of the old
bulb, twenty-three to deregulate the light bulb industry, sixteen to cut
funding for alternative lighting R&D, thirty-four to cut the tax rate on
light bulbs, fifty-three to design a block grant so the states can change
the bulb, forty-one to talk with defense contractors about night-vision
gear instead, and two hundred and eighty-three to pass a law making it
illegal to discuss naked bulbs (or screwing anything) on the Internet.


                             - * -


"He [Roger Waters] had developed his own limited, or very simple style.  He
was never very keen on improving himself as a bass player and half the time
I would play the bass on the records because I would tend to do it quicker.
Right back to those early records; I mean, at least half the bass on all the
recorded output is me anyway.... Rog used to come in and say 'Thank you very
much' to me once in a while for winning him bass-playing polls."

    - David Gilmour (Pink Floyd guitarist)



                             - * -



"All I know is the music gets to a certain point and you leave the ground."
                              
     - Neil Young



                             - * -



Q:  How many Democrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A:  If it's a union job, it will take someone to unscrew the old bulb, two
        people to carry the ladder, two additional people to steady the
        ladder, two riggers to ensure that the ladder is properly
        supported, a tool clerk to issue the ladder, another person to
        screw in the light bulb, a foreman to oversee the person screwing in
        the light bulb, a general foreman to oversee the foreman, a field
        engineer to initiate a request, a scheduler to plan the work, a
        safety engineer to watch to whole process, two people to dispose of
        the old light bulb, a procurement specialist to order the new
        light bulb, a warehouseman to receive, store, and issue the
        light bulb, a runner to checkout the light bulb, a QC engineer to
        inspect the light bulb, a QA engineer to ensure that the process
        meets all the procedural requirements, and another field engineer
        to document the replacement on an "as built."

        If it's a non-union job, it will take the same number plus one.
        The "plus one" person will do all of the work of the above while
        all the above form a picket line.



                             - * -



CONCERTREVIEWCONCERTREVIEWCONCERTREVIEWCONCERTREVIEW

LOU REED -- Electric Factory  Philadelphia, PA  3/8/96
by Steve Marshall

"Some people like to go out dancing, some people like to go
to a Lou Reed concert.", sang Lou Reed. Opening with a powerful
"Sweet Jane", Reed and his band treated admiring fans to an
energetic 18 song set. Currently on the road promoting his
new album, "Set the Twilight Reeling", Lou took the band through
great live renditions of the new material. He served up a good
helping of the old stuff too.

Aside from a problem with one of his guitars during "Video
Violence", this was a flawless evening. Reed and his band
performed about half of the songs on the new album, including
an excellent version of the title track. Lou played lead guitar
on most of the songs. On the laid back shuffle of "NYC Man",
he played some especially tasty licks.

Lou joked about trying to find the groove on the long intro
to "Dirty Blvd.". When he did, he turned it into one of the many
highlights of the night. From "New Sensations", to the medley of
"I'm Waiting for the Man/Vicious", to "I Love You, Suzanne",
Reed was clearly having a great time on stage. Lou ended the show
on a somber note though, with an excellent version of the title
track from his 1992 album, "Magic and Loss".

If you get the chance to catch Lou Reed on this tour, don't
miss it. You'll be glad you went.


                             - * -


"My recollection is that the 'breakthrough' for punk came after punk had
stopped being violent and started sounding more like disco.  When was that,
1980-82?  At the same time, the really poppy bands like the Go Go's and The
Knack had hits, then everybody got signed.  Personally, I don't think
anything really challenging ever 'broke through' the media filter to the
point where it could be heard without some effort. This is still true today,
unless you think Green Day is revolutionary."

  - Greg Shaw of Bomp Records (from December 1995 Cosmik Debris)


                             - * -

"Having Al D'Amato chair the ethics committee is like having Dr. Kevorkian
teach you the Heimlich manuever."

   - Dennis Miller


                             - * -

              

"Here's one for you. There was a recent study jointly done by two people
at Auburn University and Wayne State University. They said that while it
is debatable that rock lyrics cause suicide, they concluded that country
music does.  Therefore I figured that while Tipper Gore is in the White
House and she hasn't given me enough shit lately, it's time to make a
country album!"

  - Jello Biafra (Former singer of The Dead Kennedy's)

              
                             - * -

              
IRAN (REUTER NEWS) - For the past few weeks, the discussions at
many Iranian newspaper and magazine publishing outfits have been
revolving around the spelling of Bob Dole's name. It turns out
that the proper spelling of the Republican Party's nominee is
exactly the same as that of the word "penis" in Persian. 

A columnist for Tehran's Hamshahri daily who requested to remain
anonymous stated: It's a real problem that no one wants to face. 
Think about it. What should we write if he wins? "Clinton loses
Presidency"? That's not right. "Penis wins U.S. Presidency" isn't
exactly acceptable either.


                                 - * -
                               

"However, all parents have the right to raise their children the way they
want.  If your standards in your household are such that you don't want your
children exposed to that kind of language, those kinds of ideas, and that's
the way you want to raise your kids, you don't need legislation to do it.
You don't even need a rating on a record.  You can just say, "Don't buy any
of it."

   - Frank Zappa

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


           E-MAIL ADDRESSES FOR CONTACTING COSMIK DEBRIS' WRITERS

                      
               DJ Johnson (Editor)......moonbaby@serv.net
               James Andrews............jimndrws@serv.net
               Cai Campbell.............vex@serv.net
               coLeSLAw.................coleslaw@greatgig.com
               Shaun Dale...............stdale@well.com
               Phil Dirt................Luft.F@diversey.geis.com
               Andrew Ian Feinberg......afeinber@panix.com
               David Fenigsohn..........a-davef@microsoft.com
               Alex Gedeon..............abraxas@primenet.com
               Keith Gillard............liquid@uniserve.com
               Louise Johnson...........aquaria@serv.net
               Steven Leith.............leith@serv.net
               Steve Marshall...........MHND71F@prodigy.com
               The Platterpuss..........Plattrpuss@aol.com


   
           Cosmik Debris' WWW site..http://www.greatgig.com/cosmikdebris
           Subscription requests....moonbaby@serv.net
           Cai Campbell's BBS (Great Gig In The Sky)..206-935-8486
           Phil Dirt's Surf Site is at http://www.cygnus.com/kfjc/surf
           Keith Gillard's "Liquid Records WWW site is located
             at http://haven.uniserve.com/~liquid

           And a VERY special thanks to Gabe Martin for letting us use
           his cool cartoons in The Debris Field.  Gabe's outrageous WWW
           site is at http://www.cts.com/~borderln/todays.html and there
           are hundreds of his cartoons to check out there. (Cartoon ran
           in WWW version only, of course).


