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                   I S S U E   #  1 2  :  M A Y   1 9 9 6
=============================================================================

                         - The Specialists - 

                DJ Johnson.................Editor
                Jim Andrews................HTML
                coLeSLaw...................Artist
                Lauren Giglio..............Administrative Assistant
                Louise Johnson.............Administrative Assistant

                         - The Cosmik Writers -

                Jim Andrews..................Music & Software Reviews         
                Cai Campbell.................Columnist & Record Reviews
                coLeSLAw.....................Record Reviews
                Shaun Dale...................Politics & Record Reviews
                Phil Dirt....................Columnist & Surfmeister Deluxe
                Drew Feinberg................Columnist (MIA)
                David Fenigsohn..............Music & Film
                Alex Gedeon..................Music & Film
                Keith Gillard................Music & Record Reviews
                Steven Leith.................Politics & Columnist
                Steve Marshall...............Music & Record Reviews
                The Platterpuss..............Record Reviews
                Evelyn.......................A Modified Dog
                

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

                   T A B L E   O F   C O N T E N T S


EDITOR'S NOTES - Stuff 'bout this here ish.

TEISCO DEL REY: SHOOTING THE BREEZE WITH THE SULTAN OF CHEESE - For years
   he was known as the funny guy who wrote the "Off The Wall" column in
   Guitar Player Magazine, but a select handful of people in the music biz
   knew a secret--Teisco is a top-shelf guitarist.  After two amazing albums,
   the secret is out.  In this interview, Teisco discusses everything from
   the importance of melody to the brilliance of particular bluesmen to
   the current sorry state of baseball.

A CONSULTATION WITH THE BRAIN SURGEONS - For over a decade, Albert Bouchard
   was the drummer (and a founding member) of the amazing Blue Oyster Cult.
   Deborah Frost played drums with Flaming Youth and is a well known rock
   critic.  Together with a few close buddies, they are The Brain Surgeons,
   a hard rockin' band that picks up where BOC left off.  They talk about
   BOC, life, love, rock 'n' roll, and The Amazing Albertron in this
   interview.

THE END OF MOMUS? - Keith Gillard caught up with underground electronic pop
   god Momus for our first IRC-chat interview!  Don't you try this at home.
   After 14 years, is Momus thinking of hanging it up?  Or is he only thinking
   of retiring one particular mask?  "Momus is a mask that anyone can wear."
   Find out what that means, and what's next.

POLITICAL PLAYBOOK: FEATURING A CAST OF THOUSANDS - Part three of Shaun Dale's
   examination of the race for the White House.  This month, Shaun focuses on
   the "other" parties, from Independant to Green and beyond.

READ THIS ARTICLE OR WE'LL SHOOT THIS DOG: THE NATIONAL LAMPOON RADIO HOUR
RIDES AGAIN - It let us laugh at ourselves, and at others.  The early 70s
   radio show--which featured soon-to-be stars like Belushi, Chase, Murray,
   Guest, and Ramis--was as sick and twisted as the magazine that spawned it.
   Now Rhino Records has released a 3-CD box set, unleashing this material
   into the politically correct 90s.  What could be more fun?

RECORD REVIEWS: Lots and lots and lots and lots of reviews!  This month, we
   add yet another genre: Jazz!  Charles Mingus is thrown into the mix with
   the surf and the underground electronic pop and the punk and the rock and
   exotica and and and . . .

BETWEEN ZERO & ONE: LET THE GAMES BEGIN (Steven Leith) - As the Presidential
   Palace race heats up, the bullshit starts to fly.  Rhetorical smokescreens
   can't hide the facts, however.

IN THE DRIVE (Jim Andrews) - Our Mr. Andrews, of Urbania fame, returns from
   his long vacation in Attica.  In his new column, Jim will be taking apart
   and tinkering with various software packages.  This month: Semantec's Cafe,
   a JAVA programmers tool.

PHIL'S GARAGE: SERENDIPITY (Phil Dirt) - Mr. Dirt invites surf guitarists
   everywhere to join him in a game of kick the can.

THE AUDIO FILE (Cai Campbell) - In this new column, record collector and
   audiophile Cai Campbell discusses both of those obsessions.  This month,
   the topic is: DCC's new release of The Beach Boys "Pet Sounds."  Is this
   the definitive version?  Cai checks it against the others.

DJ RANTS: JUST ONE MORE REASON NOT TO GET A CAT (DJ Johnson) - A sick little
   precautionary tale about those furry little rats we take home and feed.

THE DEBRIS FIELD: Quotes and various "stuff," including a review of the Kids
   In The Hall flick by our own Alex Gedeon.

WE'RE IN, BUT WE'RE SCREENING OUR CALLS: How to contact us.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


                      E D I T O R ' S   N O T E S

It's getting to be more and more fun to put this thing together every month.
My own craving for nearly all genres of music is being satisfied.  My goal
from day one has been to slowly introduce various genres until Cosmik Debris
becomes the perfect zine for readers who, like myself, refuse to limit
themselves musically.  Of course, this also translates to "something for
everyone," so there's plenty of room for people who focus on one genre.  We
just can't promise that we'll COVER that genre every single month.  We'll
try, though.  While we're on the subject, we are looking for a writer with
the knowledge and skill needed to write classical reviews.  If you're that
person, please send me some e-mail at moonbaby@serv.net right away.  

This month, our review section is missing one key contributor: Platterpuss!
To his loyal fans, I apologize.  It's purely my fault.  I thought I had a
stack of his reviews ready to go, but it seems they bit it in last month's
computer virus fiasco.  By the time I'd realized it, it was too late to
contact Platterpuss to ask for more.  What a drag.  But assuming no unforseen
disasters strike in the next 30 days, Platterpuss will be back.

There are two new columns in this issue, but the writers aren't rookies by
any means.  Jim Andrews, our HTML guru, has a new column called "In The
Drive" in which he will review at least one piece of software per month.
This month he's reviewing Symantec's "Cafe," a Java programming tool.  In
the future, he plans to review music sequencing software and whatever else
strikes his fancy.  Sounds good to me.  Like Jim, Cai Campbell has been
writing for Cosmik from the beginning.  This month he begins a new column
called "The Audio File."  Yes, he's going to discuss high-quality releases
and audio equipment, but he'll also have some things to say about record
collecting.  (I've never met anyone with a record habit like Cai's!)

The interviews this month (3 of them) are as diverse as our review section.
They speak for themselves, so I'll let 'em.  Everything else is in place,
as well, so let's get to it.  Enjoy!

 - DJ

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


              SHOOTING THE BREEZE WITH THE SULTAN OF CHEESE
                      T E I S C O   D E L   R E Y

                       Interviewed by DJ Johnson

It doesn't matter what you call him.  He's been called everything from "The
Cheeze Wizard of the Guitar" to "The King of Bizarre."  There's really only
one way to address Teisco Del Rey: with the utmost respect.  Known as a music
journalist long before he was known as a musician, Teisco has been around the
music world since he was a teenager, absorbing and learning, and filing
information for future use.  Over the past few decades, Teisco's amazing
musical skills were mostly his secret to keep from the world at large, though
quite a few of his fellow musicians were in on it.  Luckily for us, he has
finally stepped out into the light with two excellent albums on Upstart
Records, "The Many Moods of Teisco Del Rey" and this years epic "Music For
Lovers."

There are some important things to know about Teisco before you read this
interview.  First of all, it's pronounced "Ty-sko," though he's probably
heard about twenty alternate pronounciations.  Second, he's one of the most
unique musical talents to come down the pike in many years.  Finally, and
this is important--he's nuts!  A blast to talk to.  If he's recording a track
and it starts to sound too serious, he'll skew it--twist and turn it until he
has "upped the fun factor," because, as he puts it, "I don't ever want to be
mistaken for Sting."  He has nothing to worry about.


                  *           *           *           *


Cosmik: On "Music For Lovers," you cover surf tunes, garage tunes, dance
   tunes...even a Finnish wedding song.  Do you have a favorite style?

Teisco: That would be the lambada. Next question.

Cosmik: Are you a big listener, too?  Do you have a great record collection?

Teisco: It's way out of hand. It took a while, but I finally realized you get
   more bang for your buck buying LPs than guitars. It's mostly vinyl, and
   mostly jazz, but tons of guitar.  All styles.

Cosmik: Who were your biggest influences?

Teisco: The most obvious are Duane Eddy--my original inspiration and still a
   hero--The Ventures, Dick Dale, Freddie King, and the song "Pipeline." But
   I was also into blues guys like Albert King, Peter Green, Mike Bloomfield,
   and later on Jimmie Vaughan. Growing up around San Francisco was also a
   big influence, the Fillmore, etcetera, as I was moving to Austin and
   getting to play with guys like Casper Rawls, Mark Korpi, David Grissom,
   and others.

Cosmik: You mentioned Mike Bloomfield.  Were you into him all through his
   career?

Teisco: Well, after a while his solo albums really started to . . . I don't
   know, they just seemed like he was repeating himself, you know, like
   when he got more into being a traditionalist again.  But the early
   Butterfield stuff . . . and the Electric Flag and the Supersession stuff,
   but mostly the Butterfield stuff, I mean, he was just a ground-breaking
   guitar player that I think, even though he spawned a legion of guitar
   playing fans, I don't know if it would ever be possible for him to get
   his just due because the pantheon of guitar heroes were Clapton, Page,
   Beck and Hendrix.  Bloomfield was every bit in that league, and I'm not
   sure there would have been a Hendrix without a Bloomfield.  I think
   Hendrix would have been different.  As amazing as Hendrix was, I don't
   think there would have been a Hendrix without Jeff Beck, either.  Jeff
   Beck was years ahead of any of those guys in just re-inventing what a
   guitar sounded like, and he had far less tools than Hendrix or anybody
   else.  And Hendrix had pretty primitive tools, himself.  Bloomfield . . .
   It's one of the axes I've got to grind . . . In this generation of guys
   in baggy suits and shades who are playing a Strat, they are so reverent
   as to sort of put The Blues in formaldehyde and keep it there, and
   Bloomfield, I mean, there was no question as to his authenticity and his
   legitimacy playing blues, but he was so much more adventuresome than any
   of these guys today.  He took chances.  I mean, the whole Butterfield
   Band . . . What blues band today would have the balls to do a 13-minute
   extended improvisation, essentially Raga, like "East-West?"  And on that
   same album they had a Tommy Boyce and Bobby Hart song that the Monkees
   recorded.  I'm not sure who recorded that first.

Cosmik: You're talking about "Mary, Mary?"

Teisco: Yeah.

Cosmik: That was a Michael Nesmith song.

Teisco: So the Monkees recorded the song before Butterfield recorded it?

Cosmik: Absolutely.

Teisco: So that's some pretty chancy stuff.  My first guitar heroes were
    The Ventures and Duane Eddy and Lonnie Mack.  Lonnie Mack was the first
    one that really gave me the idea that "this guy's going out on a limb,"
    because he wasn't just playing melodies and his solos didn't sound like
    little, you know, parts.  But one step beyond Lonnie Mack, the first clue
    that I had about that was Jeff Beck, and I guess, in a way unbeknownst to
    me, Eric Clapton because Eric's on most of the "For Your Love" album by
    The Yardbirds, but it wasn't known at the time in America.  That sort of
    crystalized the concept of what the lead guitar player is.  Beck had sort
    of taken the James Burton role to this gunslinger razor-blade totin' image.
    Then Bloomfield took it so far beyond that, you know?  He was just out
    there playing everything under the sun.  Rock and roll, blues, jazz . . .
    There are country elements that you hear crop up in Bloomfield's playing.
    That was my introduction to what an electric blues band was.  I hadn't
    heard Muddy Waters or Junior Wells or Howlin' Wolf or John Mayall.  I
    heard Butterfield first.  To me, it was like "Well hey, this is rock and
    roll, but way ballsier.  This is like rock and roll played by grownups."

Cosmik: Was that an isolated thing for you, or did you actually go through a
    blues phase?

Teisco: Oh, that changed my life.  That was, fortunately, in the days when
    they had really extensive liner notes that weren't in 5-point type inside
    a booklet, and the back of the first Butterfield album was my textbook.
    Everybody that was mentioned on that . . . see, fortunately I lived in
    Northern California and you could go into these very hip record stores in
    Berkeley.  I'd hang around Telegraph Avenue and in a certain three block
    radius there were probably five or six incredible record stores.  And I'd
    remember all those names on the back of the Butterfield album and I'd go
    find albums by James Cotton, Junior Wells, Jimmy Reed . . . all the Chicago
    guys.  Around the same time, the Bluesbreakers album came out, and as sad
    as I think Clapton's eventually returning to blues and dishing up something
    as lame and boring as "From The Cradle" [is], he proved his mettle.  When
    he was nineteen or twenty years old, he played like no one had ever played
    blues.  And the thing about Bloomfield and Clapton was that it didn't just
    cross over to rock and roll people.  I know, absolutely, that those older
    blues guys in their way were emulating, but taking to another step . . .
    those blues guys themselves listened to Bloomfield and Clapton.  People
    like Albert King -- like listen to "I Love Lucy" on the Stax single.  The
    volume he's playing at, the kind of sustain and feedback that he was
    getting, those guys didn't do that, not in that way, before Clapton and
    Bloomfield opened up that possibility to them.

Cosmik: Albert Collins once told me that he used to sit down and pick out
    Clapton's solos note for note.

Teisco: Yeah!  See, what kind of testimonial is that?  I mean, that's truly
    amazing.  It's the ultimate compliment you could ever get. The other great
    quote that I always loved was B.B. King's one line quote about Peter Green,
    which was "He makes me sweat."  Peter Green was the other one.  If Stevie
    Ray Vaughan was the maximist and Jimmy Vaughan was the minimalist, then
    Clapton and Bloomfield were the maximists and Peter Green was the
    minimalist.  I hate to even differentiate between "here's the white guy
    playing blues and here's the black guy," but if you're going to talk about
    race, then Peter Green is in a category of his own.  If he never even
    plugged in a guitar, listen to the guy sing!  He's an incredibly soulful
    blues singer, he's a great guitar player.  Those bands, early Fleetwood
    Mac and Butterfield, and John Mayall, to a degree, although he was a
    little more traditionalist, but the Blues Project . . . they didn't have
    rules and regulations.  They weren't the "Blues Nazis" type attitude
    that's prevalent now.  It had a lot to do with the 60s, it had to do with
    the fact that they were the first generation of white hip young guys
    playing blues in electric bands.  You know, [for] The Blues Project, it
    was nothing to do a Jimmy Reed song and then do a jazz-flute thing and
    then do a folk song like "Violets Of Dawn."  On the first album, they did
    "Catch The Wind" by Donovan.  It's great.  I love that stuff.
    
Cosmik: The feeling you get from Peter Green is that he wasn't playing blues
    to be playing blues.  He was playing what he felt and it happened to come
    out blues.

Teisco: Yeah, it was the vehicle that he could express himself on.  And he
    also, with songs like "Albatros" and "Green Maniliche," was pushing the
    envelope.  And in another way, people would probably think of Charlie
    Musslewhite as being a more traditional blues guy, a little more than, say,
    Butterfield, a lot more than Fleetwood Mac or The Blues Project, certainly.
    But think about it: he had Harvey Mandel on guitar, who was like pre-Jimi
    Hendrix doing all kinds of experimental sonic-type stuff, and Musslewhite
    was doing Blue Note jazz tunes and stuff like that on those early albums.
    I got to know Musslewhite . . . obviously, since he's on my first CD.  I
    knew him probably since about the age of 16, and he turned me on to a lot
    of jazz records.  He knows his stuff.  He was the one that hipped me to
    this Clifford Brown With Strings album on the Emarcy jazz label, which to
    me is the most romantic record ever made.  Buy that CD.  If you've got a
    special occasion, anniversary or something, or a hot date, put that CD on.
    If you don't get lucky then you CAN'T get lucky!  You might as well throw
    in the towel.

Cosmik: When you're playing with someone like Musslewhite . . . I'm sure a
    lot of people out there wouldn't know who he is, but as someone who knows
    what he means to the blues, do you think it pushes you to a higher level
    in your playing?

 Teisco: Oh yeah.  It's scary.  And same with Jimmy Vaughan, or just any
    number of guys, like when I moved down here and Mike Buck volunteered
    his services as being my drummer.  He was the original Thunderbirds
    drummer, then he left and formed a group called the Leroi Brothers that
    he still has.  But see, the norm in Texas is that there are guys who if
    you had to categorize the style or styles of music that they play, and
    play incredibly well, it's "Texas."  That IS the style.  And that
    encompasses . . . Okay, just in the case of Mike Buck -- He's the most
    low-down, perfectly sloppy, loud, greasy blues drummer on the planet.
    He's also just about as good as you could ever get as a rockabilly drummer,
    as a cajun drummer, he plays great surf music, he can play the shit out
    of a polka, he can play western swing.  He can play ALL that stuff,
    because it's all TEXAS stuff and those guys grew up having to play it all.
    You can go see a country band and ask them to play "Hideaway" by Freddie
    King.  They will kick ass.  It's like what you were saying about Jimmy
    Vaughan.  Listen to the Junior Brown record where Jimmy Vaughan takes
    that solo on "My Wife Thinks You're Dead."  He sounds like the guitar
    player of The Texas Playboys type of playing blues.  Those guys played
    blues!  Texas Playboys did "Milk Cow Blues" and stuff like that.  There
    are people that . . . in the case of like a Doug Sahm [Sir Douglas Quintet]
    kind of guy, the guy's like a walking synthesizer of everything that ever
    came through Texas, from the Bobby Fuller Four and Buddy Holly to Bob
    Wills and T-Bone Walker and Flaco Jimenez and Sir Douglas Quintet . . .

Cosmik: Sir Douglas Quintet.  Man, I haven't heard that name in a while.

Teisco: Yeah, well that was Doug Sahm's group.  That was when he passed
    himself off as a British Invasion group.

Cosmik: . . . when he was playing Tex-Mex.

Teisco: Yeah, Tex-Mex with a Vox Continental, you know?  But it's a joy to be
    able to play with guys like that, but it is daunting.  After I'd moved
    down here for a while, the LeRoi Brothers asked me to come up and sit in
    with them, and I just didn't think that that ever happened.  It was pretty
    intimidating, but it's also real stimulating.  It's real exciting to be
    stuck in that position.

Cosmik: Did you feel your performance came up a notch?

Teisco: Oh yeah!  You know, the old axiom is "play with people who are better
    than you and you get better."  For most of the time I've had my band down
    here, my other guitar player has been Casper Rawls.  He's another one of
    these examples of this Texas-type player.  He is born to be in the
    Buckaroos.  In fact, last summer he got to play with Buck Owens, finally,
    and he rose to the occasion like nobody's business.  Buck Owens referred
    to him as a work of art.  I wasn't even up there.  It was one of the most
    thrilling things I ever got to be part of, just by watching it.  He learned
    how to play off Ventures records like everybody else, more or less, of this
    generation, and one of his heroes is Freddie King, you know?  I mean, he's
    an all-around great guitar player.  There's another guitar player who's
    very similar named John Reed who's been associated with Doug Sahm off and
    on for years and years.  He told me once that "My problem is I can't get
    my country out of my blues playing and I can't get my blues out of my
    country playing."  And I said "John, that's what makes you great."
    Because these guys can cover that gamut but they never sound like they're
    quoting back records.  They have their own stamp.  In the case of playing
    with Musslewhite, that was more like old home week.  I'd had a couple of
    chances to sit around a living room and jam with Musslewhite.

Cosmik: That must have been great in itself.

Teisco: Yeah, and I think somewhere I have a tape of me and him playing in
    my living room when I was a college kid in my home in Northern California.
    He once hired me.  I'm sure it was a case where a gig came up and several
    other guitar players couldn't make it, because I wouldn't have been the
    first on the list.  But I got to play a gig once with Musslewhite, and
    to sit in with him at a club a couple of times, and it's always been
    nothing but fun.  He is one of my favorites.  I followed his whole
    career.  Harmonica is the one instrument where you find . . . I guess
    because there are so few, it's got something to do with the mentality
    that goes into playing the harmonica or something, but you'll find
    harmonica players actually do this: they sit around and rate the ten top
    harmonica players.  And they'll usually include themselves somewhere in
    that top ten.  Musslewhite doesn't do that, but these younger guys do.
    And for my money, I don't care who can play Little Walter licks backwards
    the fastest, or anything like that.  Musslewhite always has so much more
    emotion in his playing.  It's really coming from some place deep down.
 
Cosmik: Who's out there today that you go out of your way to hear?

Teisco: Los Lobos, Laika and the Cosmonauts of course, Sonny Landreth, and I
    really love C.C. Adcock.

Cosmik: How do you pick the covers you record?  Is there any specific process
    to it?

Teisco: I try to pick tunes that one, haven't been done to death, and two,
   whenever possible haven't even been heard by lay people.

Cosmik: Does the inner-journalist come out when you're picking covers?  Do
   you ever record something because you want to turn people on to a great
   old band?

Teisco: The only old band I want to turn people on to is Teisco Del Rey & the
   Nut Rockers.

Cosmik: I'm guessing a lot of people are going to hear your album and get
   curious about The Frantics.

Teisco: I heard "Werewolf" on some History Of Northwest Rock collection. They
   were contemporaries of bands like the Sonics and Wailers, and Jerry Miller
   of Moby Grape played guitar with them, but I think that was after
   "Werewolf."  They were produced by Bob Reisdorf, who also worked with the
   Ventures, and on the original, that's him doing the Wolfman recitation.
   Their record had snarling wolf sounds, which I replaced with the woman
   screaming.

Cosmik: Of course, if they're not already aware of Link Wray they haven't
   been paying attention, but most people probably hadn't ever heard "Steel
   Trap." How long have you been playing that one?

Teisco: I have to confess I'd never heard the song until a band in town,
   Nervous Pervis & the Jitters, started throwing it in on gigs. So I learned
   it, and asked if they'd be the backup band on that track. One of their
   guitarists, Grady Pinkerton, and I trade leads.

Cosmik: Do you play any of Link's other songs live?

Teisco: The Japanese version of my first CD, The Many Moods Of Teisco Del
   Rey, has four live bonus tracks, including my version of "Jack the Ripper."
   I started playing it on electric 12-string . . .originally at a jam, I
   think . . .so it inevitably turns into a tour de force of 12-string
   psychedelic licks--"Eight Miles High," "Little Girl," "Hard Day's Night,"
   "Hey Joe," "Hava Nagila" . . .

Cosmik: What's the most important consideration in covering a song?

Teisco: It has to be something I can put my own stamp on. I hear something
   and it goes through my filtration system and comes out in my style. A
   perfect example would be "Seville"--from Verdi to Bugs Bunny to me,
   obviously leaning a lot on the Dick Dale influence, but switching to
   Duane Eddy for the bridge.

Cosmik: Was Dick Dale a big influence early on?

Teisco: Not early on, no.  To tell you the truth, if I got the Dick Dale
   influence, it was probably second hand.  At least a lot of it.  People
   don't realize today that if you didn't live in Southern California, you
   just sort of knew this guy's name as a legend.  He didn't have hit records.
   I mean, he's less than a one-hit-wonder.  He had, I think, one or two . . .
   "Let's Go Trippin'" and "Miserlou" . . . ever get on the charts as singles,
   and that was back in the days when singles were all you had.  I heard
   "Let's Go Trippin'" probably first by The Beach Boys.  And probably
   "Miserlou," too, for that matter.  Their first album had both of those
   tunes on it, I think.  Their first or second album.  And The Beach Boys
   were heavyweight enough that you would actually go out and buy the album.
   On the other hand, one of the biggest influences in my life, probably,
   was hearing the song "Pipeline."  If The Chantays never did anything
   else, that would have been enough.  You can't improve upon that little
   piece of instrumental imagery.  It's amazing to me.  It was written and
   recorded by a couple of sixteen year old guys.  The guitar players were
   named Brian Carmen and Bob Spickard.  I got to meet those guys once.
   And the funny thing was they came up to me at one of those N.A.M.M.
   [National Association of Musical Merchandisers] shows, and I was there
   with Guitar Player [magazine], and they came up, familiar with my writing
   about weird guitars, and they were sort of fans of mine before I'd
   recorded or anything.  And I said "I've always had one question.  Which
   of you guys played which part?"  Brian Carmen said "well, I played the
   [Teisco sings the rhythm part}" and Bob Spickard said "yeah, I played
   the melody."  And I looked at these guys and said "you two guys, combined,
   are my biggest guitar influence."  They were just blown away.  But I
   mean, they are!  That is such a classic.  It's probably been recorded
   hundreds of times by now.  See, I think it's safe to say that them doing
   that reverby double picked sort of mandolin style picking on the guitar,
   ANY of those surf bands got that from Dick Dale.  When he became an
   influence was in the late 70s when I, as a goof, in a way, started this
   surf band with a friend called Cowabunga.  We opened for The Blasters,
   we opened for David Lindley, we played around the Bay Area in these little
   new wave kind of clubs and stuff like that.  We started it before we even
   found out that Jon and the Nightriders existed, so we thought we were
   the only guys on the planet who were playing instrumental surf music.

Cosmik: What year was this, about?

Teisco: About 78 . . . 79.  You know, we wore white Levi's and striped shirts
   and stuff like that, and I already had a little bit of a collection of
   cheap guitars.  But early on when I sort of looked at the repertoire of
   surf stuff, I decided that we would be complete wimps if we didn't even
   attempt "Miserlou" and some of the Dick Dale stuff.  But I couldn't play
   that stuff.  The OTHER guy couldn't play that stuff.  So it was like an
   assignment.  I set out to learn how to do that.

Cosmik: Speed picking and all that?

Teisco: Yeah, there are different ways of doing it, and in fact I don't do
   it the same way Dick Dale does.  His pivot point is his elbow.  His whole
   arm is going up and down real fast, and he uses like the most heavy guage
   strings in the world and the stiffest PICK in the world.  And I use pretty
   heavy guage strings.  I use a flexible pick when I do that stuff.  I anchor
   with the heel of my hand and I sort of, you know, pivot from the wrist.
   David Lindley, when he does his "Turkish saws of bazooki" kind of playing,
   he can do that same kind of shit from the source.  He has a real relaxed
   loose arm.  I've tried doing that, and it makes total sense.  You can play
   a lot faster and you don't wear your arm out.  Dick Dale, his arms are
   like steel bands while he's playing that.  The reason I do it my way rather
   than the way Dick Dale does it is, to me, the minimum of motion is part of
   the key.  You know, you have a real confined little area that you're going
   up and down.  But a lot of it is like, you know, it helps if you've got an
   early 60s Showman amplifier with these big JBL's, because they really
   fatten it up and pump away, and then you get the reverb unit and there's a
   certain way of giving it that really drippy sound without totally drenching
   it so it sounds like you're at the bottom of a well or something.  But,
   yeah, that was when he became an influence.  He definitely was not an
   influence at all, in any way shape or form, before I had the group
   Cowabunga.  And it was more just out of necessity.  But of course, I loved
   him, I mean when I heard him he was mind-boggling, and still is.  When he
   made his comeback tour after "Tribal Thunder," we got to open some shows in
   Austin and Houston.  It was just such a kick to watch these people come out
   and see this guy that they thought was going to be an old nostolgia act and
   then see Dick Dale just completely . . . I mean, it's like Michael J. Fox
   in "Back To The Future" when that speaker blows him backwards, you know?
   Dick Dale plays with more force than any guitar player that's ever been.

Cosmik: He'll tell ya so, too. (laughs).

Teisco: Yeah.  Yeah!  Definitely!  You don't believe me, ask Dick! (laughs).
   But I mean, you know, I think most people would have to agree that Stevie
   Ray Vaughan was one of the most powerful guitar players.  Go see "Back To
   The Beach."  It's worth the whole lousy movie to see those guys jam on
   "Pipeline" and see Dick Dale just BURY him!  And you know, I'm not trying
   to put down Stevie.  I loved the guy.  But it's like when people come up
   to me and say "hey man, you sound just like Dick Dale," I usually look
   around and make sure Dick Dale is nowhere in the county.  Then I can go
   "thank you very much."  Otherwise, I sound like an approximation.  I sound
   better than 90% of the other Dick Dale sound-alikes.  It's a true testimony
   to a guy as a stylist when you cannot do one of his tunes without at least
   making an attempt to play like him.  What are you gonna do?  You can't do
   "Miserlou" like Merle Travis, or something like that.  You have to do it
   with a big sound with that speed picking and the reverb and all that stuff
   or you're REALLY going to sound foolish.  You're going to sound foolish
   enough sort of stacking yourself up to Dick Dale.

Cosmik: You dedicated "Madison Time" to Tracy Turnblad, who was a character
   in the film "Hairspray."  Was that a casual dedication, or are you really
   a fan of the film?

Teisco: Tracy Turnblad--and Ricki Lake--was my dream date until she lost all
   that weight and became a talk show host. I love that film and that song.

Cosmik: I have this funny vision of "Madison Time" on a single, with a
   picture of the band wearing sweaters with "P's" for "You're Punished"
   on them. (laughs)

Teisco: (laughs) Yeah, well the funny thing is . . . I've got to check with
   the promoter . . . next weekend we're playing a festival in San Antonio.
   It's one of these big outdoor multi-cultural kind of extravaganzas.  He
   called me as sort of an after-thought when he'd listened to the CD some
   more . . . and he's a fan anyway, but he's the guy who's putting the
   concert on . . . and he said "you know, we've got a couple of dance troops
   that are going to be part of the festival.  If I can find somebody who
   knows how or will learn how to do the Madison . . ." and I said "we'll do
   it, definitely. Let us know, we will do it."  So I'm hoping that happens.
   If it does, we're going to make sure it gets videotaped.

Cosmik: One of the original tunes, "Hermanos Alou," was dedicated to the Alou
   brothers, who played baseball in the 60s and 70s.  Is baseball a passion
   of yours?

Teisco: It used to be--not so much anymore. I grew up going to the Giants at
   Seals Stadium, before Candlestick Park, to see the Alou's, Willie Mays,
   Orlando Cepeda, Willie McCovey. Then the Oakland A's moved to town, and I
   got to see Reggie, Joe Rudy, Campy Campaneris, Sal Bando, and later Willie
   McCovey again.

Cosmik: What team do you follow?

Teisco: None. Austin was supposed to get a minor league team, the Swings, but
   it was voted down. Occasionally I go to San Antonio Missions games. The
   minors are more like what baseball is supposed to be about than the majors
   anymore.

Cosmik: We need more musicians to go on record about this . . . Do you think
   baseball is in big trouble?

Teisco: That's an understatement. Until they stick Pete Rose in the Hall of
   Fame, and Orlando Cepeda for that matter, there's no point even talking
   about it.

Cosmik: Damned straight!  Okay, back to "Hermanos Alou." On that track, you
   turn Mitch Watkins loose with an acoustic guitar, and his solo is
   absolutely incredible.  In fact, you do that a lot, while most solo
   artists don't want anyone challenging them for the spotlight.  Don't you
   have an ego?

Teisco: The sound you're now hearing is a zillion friends laughing at such a
   notion. My ego isn't in the Dick Dale category, but it's pretty big. I've
   always been a bandleader, never a sideman. To me, using Mitch--or Casper
   or Sonny Landreth--is a matter of arranging the tune. I can't do
   everything--like play Latin jazz or Louisiana slide--but it makes my CD
   more musical.

Cosmik: "Music For Lovers" is crowded with great players.  Did you have those
   people in mind when you wrote the arrangements for the songs?

Teisco: Sometimes, like with Sonny on the second-line version of "Limbo
   Rock."  Sometimes I'll throw a solo to someone not knowing what they'll
   come up with--it's just for contrast, so it's not all my tone, my sound,
   my style.

Cosmik: You worked with Laika & the Cosmonauts quite a bit on this record.
   Did you know them before you were on Upstart?

Teisco: I met Janne Haavisto in '88 in Austin, when he gave me a tape of his
   surf band, Pluto & the Astronauts. A year or two later he and Matti, the
   organist, tracked me down on another trip to Austin, and asked me to write
   the notes to the second Laika LP, "Surfs You Right." I think it was the
   year after that, maybe '91, that we first gigged together in Austin, and
   it's become a tradition. Janne's the best drummer I've ever worked with,
   and I think as players and composers, they're taking this instrumental
   stuff to the next step better than any band out there. They're also a
   blast to record with, and Janne was indispensible in the mixing stage.

Cosmik: Sonny Landreth's slide playing on "Second Line Limbo" gives me
   goosebumps every time I hear it.  You mentioned in your liner notes that
   you had always wanted to record with him.  Was that a particularly
   satisfying track to record?

Teisco: Yes, because to me that little novelty ditty--we all had the Chubby
   Checker 45--made so much sense with that groove. And Sonny weaved his
   playing around what I was doing so well!

Cosmik: "El Sleazo Chorizo" is surf guitar and reggae bass, which is an
   amazingly effective mix.  It's credited to Steve Soest from Dick Dale's
   band, The Del-Tones, and in your liner notes you say you heard it on a
   demo tape he sent you.  Is yours the only recording of the song that's
   actually been released? 

Teisco: Yes, and as luck would have it, my drummer, Lisa Pankratz, is an
   incredible reggae drummer.  Also rockabilly, blues, etc., etc.

Cosmik: Have you heard from Steve?  What does he think of your version?

Teisco: He loves it, even though I apparently added a few notes to the basic
   melody.  It had been a while since I'd listened to the demo.

Cosmik: Do you think you might do some more reggae flavored tunes?

Teisco: Sure, if the melody is strong. That was a first for me, but I like
   pushing myself in new directions.

Cosmik: I've gotta ask...In "Missterri Meat," a woman calmly says some
   strange words here and there, like "Soupisch."  Never heard of that.
   What is it?

Teisco: All of those words--linguica, soupisch, melasovitch, vingadosh--are
   types of Portugese food. In Northern California there are lots of
   Portugese people.  You can get a linguica sandwich at the snack bar at an
   A's game, but in Texas I have to have that stuff shipped to me. It's out
   of this world.

Cosmik: Both "Seville" and "Twango" are great surf tunes, and I think a lot
   of people, correctly or incorrectly, think of you as a surf musician. I
   know it's a form you're passionate about, anyway.  What do you think makes
   a good surf song?

Teisco: A memorable melody and an evocative mood--which is pretty much true,
   regardless of style. It has to be more than a two-note riff that "sounds
   surfy."

Cosmik: This question was spoon-fed to me by a mutual friend of ours, Phil
   Dirt. He said to ask you how you feel about bands that do surf covers
   without getting the basic melody right.  Fire away!  I'll just stand . . .
   over here . . .

Teisco: Ah-hah! This was always a thorn in my side in the early '80s when
   there was a mini revival of younger bands around San Jose. You can write
   it off to punk attitude, but more often it's just a lack of ear training.
   To me, it's like getting the words wrong to a song with lyrics. "Night
   and day, you are the bun..."

Cosmik: What are some of your other pet peeves?  What makes you cringe?

Teisco: Musically? Stuff that's light weight. Whether it's surf, rockabilly,
   country, blues--it's supposed to have balls, sex appeal. Most stuff I hear
   today, even lots of the retro stuff, has no sense of humor or romance. I'm
   pissed that the Platters aren't in the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, yet the
   Velvet Underground is. People forget that rock & roll was also make-out
   music. Thank God, I didn't have my first French kiss to Led Zeppelin II--
   or "Smells Like Teen Spirit," for that matter.

Cosmik: Do you appreciate surf bands that bring other elements into it?

Teisco: Yeah, I think you need to add other elements into it, and that's why
   when you're asking me about a lot of these other surf bands, and I feel
   a little embarassed that I just don't listen to them . . . It took me a
   long time to figure this out, but to keep what I do fresh and bring
   various elements into it, I find myself listening to anything BUT surf
   music.  You know, Finish folk music, or New Orleans music, or soundtrack
   music or opera in the case of Barber Of Seville, or cartoon music.  It
   gets too inbred if all you listen to is the other guys that are doing the
   same thing that you're doing.  And I think that's always been the case.
   Think about the gamut of stuff that the Beatles must have listened to in
   order to come out with as many styles as they did.  Plus, they had four
   incredibly creative people in one band, all listening to different stuff
   and all, in a way, competing with each other to get their song on the next
   record.

Cosmik: Especially John and Paul.  They scared each other into writing.

Teisco: Yeah.  And then George, you know, I think it's significant that
   the songs George had on some of those records were incredibly great songs.
   And the reason was that they HAD to be. Otherwise, John and Paul would
   have had two or three albums worth of great tunes at any given moment, so
   he had to write something as good as "Taxman," you know, to get it on
   there.  It's weird, because if you hear the gamut of stuff they did NOW,
   or for that matter . . . not quite as eclectic, but a group like Creedence
   Clearwater Revival had everything from folk music to gospel and country
   and western and psychedelic.  That stuff would just be deemed unworthy of
   the radio today.  You couldn't get a song like "I Don't Want To Spoil The
   Party" on the radio.  You couldn't get a song like "Looking Out My Back
   Door" by Creedence on AM OR FM rock radio.

Cosmik: Funny, too, because you hear that one all the time on the radio . . .

Teisco: Well, NOW, because it's an oldie.  It's a hit.  I'm saying if you had
   something that was that country coming out today . . . I mean, think about
   country radio.  It's not even that country.  Most of it is far more rock
   and roll.  Creedence Clearwater would be having hit records as a country
   act if they were around today.

Cosmik: "Casbah" is an amazing track.  Three drummers, three solos and one
   combination-solo with all three drummers kicking for dear life at once.
   Was that as much fun to watch as it is to listen to?

Teisco: Yes, I wish there'd been a video. Originally there were going to be
   four drummers, but that's a long story.

Cosmik: How did that idea evolve?  Did you just have all these drummers in
   the studio at once arguing over playing time?

Teisco: Actually, they each wanted to play as briefly as possible--they're
   pretty ego-less. Basically I couldn't decide on which drummer to use,
   because they're all so distinctive. Also I think the album needed a
   gimmick.  There go the zillion friends laughing again.

Cosmik: Before you heard Tim Ware's arrangement of "Theme From Lawrence Of
   Arabia," could you picture it as a surf tune?

Teisco: No, even after listening to the original soundtrack with that in
   mind. I'm glad he could hear it, kind of like me hearing New Orleans
   underneath "Limbo Rock," because it was a blast to cut, albeit more
   difficult than "Moondawg."

Cosmik: I thought "Sealed With A Kiss" was an interesting choice, because the
   original was so . . . sort of "cookie cutter," but it's one of the most
   beautiful melodies I've ever heard.

Teisco: Yeah, if you separate it from that syrupy time capsule of rock and
   roll, which it was definitely part of. . . it was part of the teen idol
   period of rock and roll that The Beatles blew out of the water. . .that
   was a great little melody.  It's a great little song.

Cosmik: That's what I thought was so great about your version.  It gave
   people a chance to really HEAR it . . .

Teisco: Well, I intend to do more of that.  I don't want to reveal all my
   ideas, but . . .

Cosmik: Come on, come on!

Teico: Naw, there's a lot of candidates for that kind of stuff, whether it's
   taking this opera motif and doing it a la Dick Dale with a pummeling
   surf rhythm section, or bringing out the melody of some song that people
   just think of as wallpaper and voicing it in a certain way.  It's not just
   confined to oldies, either.  Off the record, I'll tell you that at our
   South by Southwest show . . . Well, I guess since I did it publically,
   why does it have to be off the record . . . But we do . . .not so much a
   Dick Dale, it's more of like an Astronauts approach to the song "Popcorn,"
   by Hot Butter.

Cosmik: Oh my God, I thought that one was dead forever.  Astronauts approach?
   So we've got heavy reverb on that one?

Teisco: Yeah, heavy reverb.  The fun thing about it is it goes by so fast it's
   like trying to fit the melody in while you're flying by the seat of your
   pants.  And that's the beauty of it.  That's one song that I would like to
   try to do totally live, just bashing and screaming and yelling and . . .
   get through it.

Cosmik: So you're talking like Surfaris' drums and everything?

Teisco: Yeah, the drums are a lot more like The Surfari's and the guitar is
   a lot more like The Astronauts.  See, I could hear that immediately.

Cosmik: What made you think of Hot Butter?  I mean, what would make you think
   to do this?

Teisco: Well, I think Rhino probably put out some retrospective . . .

Cosmik: "Have A Nice Day?"

Teisco: Yeah, it was either that or the "Rock Instrumental" series, or maybe
   I just heard it on an oldies station.  But that's one of those examples, if
   you hear it one way, that's the way you've always heard it, you know, the
   computer synthesizer kind of thing.  It's got a strong melody that's very
   similar to some of the types of melodies that The Astronauts and those
   groups used to do.  I was going to put it on the last album, but there was
   just too much other stuff, and it would have required a little more
   rehearsal and arrangement, because I was still hearing it in my head.  We
   hadn't done it live yet.

 Cosmik: I can't imagine having come up with that, though. (Laughs)

 Teisco: Well that's just the tip of the iceberg! (Laughs) There's all kinds
    of shit.

Cosmik: On "Werewolf," who did the great screams?

Teisco: Zoe, who also recited the "Missterri Meat" menu. She's also the
   blonde bathing beauty pictured in The Many Moods.

Cosmik: Herman The German did the cool intro dialogue for "Werewolf" in one
   take!  I take it you and Herman are pals from playing together in Austin?

Teisco: Yes, and he brings by day-old rolls and brownies when he's out making
   deliveries. One review credited him to Texas French Bread like that was a
   band; that's his job--driving a bakery truck. He also plays a mean polka
   on guitar and does the most bizarre, German-accented version of
   "B-I-Bicky-Bi-Bo-Bo-Go" you've ever heard!

Cosmik: Did you move to Austin specifically because of the music scene there?

Teisco: Yes, and because of the pace, the friendliness of the people, the
   simplicity. Not to mention the Mexican food.

Cosmik: Describe what that scene's like today.  

Teisco: It ebbs and flows, but it's still the most vital, highest caliber
   live music scene in the world. Any Sunday night you can see Junior Brown
   at the Continental, Tuesdays are Toni Price at happy hour. There are
   sub-scenes going on I don't even know about.

Cosmik: Tell me about the bands that people haven't heard about from Austin
   that really need to be heard.

Teisco: Some aren't necessarily new bands, like the LeRoi Bros. who've been
   around 15 years. They're still my favorite group anywhere. Also, Marti
   Brom is a really cool rockabilly singer, Herman the German, the Tail
   Gators, David Grissom, Jimmie Vaughan, Doyle Bramhall.

Cosmik: How about the behind-the-scenes scene?  I've heard stories about lots
   of late night jams long after the bars are closed in Austin.

Teisco: That's kind of a myth. Happens once in a while--sometimes you wish it
   didn't.  Some guy singing "Stormy Monday" at 3:00 AM.

Cosmik: How did your performance at the big South by Southwest festival go?

Teisco: Fantastic! We closed an all-surf, mostly all-instro night, following
   the Mermen. Opened with "Limbo Rock," the band sounded great, the crowd
   dug it. Lisa "Casbah'd" her ass off.

Cosmik: Did you get a chance to hear any of the other bands?

Teisco: Only the Mermen, unfortunately, who I hadn't seen in years. Finally
   met their guitarist, Jim. Nice guy. I stayed away from all the other
   showcases. Sounds weird, but you'd understand if this influx came to your
   town every year.

Cosmik: How's the pawn shop scene in Austin? Have you already cleaned 'em out?

Teisco: More the other way around--they've cleaned me out.

Cosmik: One of your nicknames is "The cheeze wizard of the electric guitar."
   Accurate description?

Teisco: Yes, I used to be the champion of el-cheapo guitar, but I graduated.
   In Japan I'm just known as the King of Bizarre. Period.

Cosmik: A lot of people think of you and strange off-brand guitars as
   inseparable.  Do you own anything boring?  Like a '59 Gold Top Paul?

Teisco: My first electric, a 17th birthday present from my dad, was a '61 Les
   Paul/SG, which I still have. I degenerated from there after discovering a
   silver metal-flake Italian vegematic called a Diamond Ranger.

Cosmik: What's your personal favorite to play?  You know, what guitar would
   you take to a desert island?

Teisco: My '64 white Fender Jazzmaster. It's the guitar heard on "Seville,"
   "Sleazo," "Twango,"...lots of stuff.

Cosmik: Among the guitars listed in the liner notes of "Music For Lovers" is
   the Guitorgan.  What exactly is a Guitorgan?

Teisco: It's the invention of the late Bob Murrell of Waco, Texas. He'd take
   hollowbody Japanese models and implant organ circuitry in them and wire
   each and every fret so as to be touch sensitive. So when people say it
   sounds like an organ, well, it is; it's just triggered by strings touching
   frets, instead of pressing down on a keyboard.

Cosmik: Wouldn't that be real easy to fuck up on?

Teisco: Yeah.  You really do have to articulate your fingering a lot better.
   And you know, you're hearing the stuff in the studio that we can
   painstakingly do correctly if we need to.

Cosmik: But it's still going to point out every mistake you make . . .

Teisco: Oh yeah, live, it's like warts and all sometimes, but inevitably it's
   just slop along the way.  You just have to really concentrate and think
   of every note you're touching and where you're touching it.

Cosmik: Was it almost a re-learning process?

Teisco: It was when I first started playing the Guitorgan, it definitely does
   help your left hand technique, and fortunately it does carry over to
   guitar playing somewhat, so my guitar playing is probably a bit more
   precise than it was.  Also, the more time you spend in studios you learn
   that you can't just sort of, like, "okay, here's my little hot lick."
   Each note has to be attacked a certain way.  You have to have some
   consistancy in your picking.  Guys that do that day in and day out in the
   studio, that's second nature to them.  They know that.  Because otherwise,
   you don't realize when you're playing live or when you're playing in your
   bedroom how inconsistant your phrasing is from one note to another or one
   phrase to another.  One will be loud, one will be soft, one will be
   perfectly in time and the next will be sort of all over the map.

Cosmik: Do you try to shy away from using compressors?

Teisco: Yeah, it's funny . . .Janne was adding compression after the fact in
   the mixing process, and I sort of let him keep adding that until it really
   starts sounding like, to me, a modern techno kind of studio-ized thing,
   then I go "nope, that's too much, take some of that off." And on this
   album, more so than the first one, we did experiment, like on "Werewolf,"
   we really went way over the top.  That was sort of our little half-assed,
   you know, take a couple hours extra and try to make it sound like the
   Latin Playboys record by Los Lobos or something.  Our version of it.  It's
   like you compress it and make it sound like it's coming out of a telephone
   or through a boom-box or something.  Janne is much more versed in studio
   technology, and that's why it's real helpful working with him.  I'm sort
   of the other end of the spectrum.  I just want it to sound . . . I don't
   want it to sound like a demo.  I want it to sound like a professional
   finished record.  But I don't really want it to sound like there's a lot
   of gadgetry involved.

Cosmik: Of course, even guitarists who've never actually heard you probably
   know you from your Guitar Player Magazine column, "Off The Wall."  How
   much writing do you do these days?

Teisco: More than ever, under various names. My regular column, "Teisco's
   Forbidden Planet," is in a mag called Guitar Shop.
      
Cosmik: How hard is it to balance journalism and playing?

Teisco: Probably a bit harder than balancing music and driving a bakery
   truck, because it's all music; there's no time when I'm "off the clock."
   But that's also a luxury. I don't have someone yelling at me because I was
   hearing some tune in my head and didn't get the baguettes to While Foods
   on time.

Cosmik: "Off The Wall" was all about cheesy guitars.  Do you still hit the
   pawnshops on the road looking for bizarre guitars?

Teisco: First off, I rarely play outside Austin, so "the road" is Congress
   Ave., Guadalupe St., I-35, and South Lamar. I don't hunt near as much as
   I did--and even then guitars would find me, whether I was looking or not. 

Cosmik: What are some of your cheesiest recent finds?

Teisco: I recently got a '62 Magnatone that's way cool, but before that the
   most recent guitar I got was a Burns Nu-Sonic about a year ago.

Cosmik: How many guitars in your collection at this point?

Teisco: 65 or 70.

Cosmik: For flat-out cheesiness, what's the top of the heap in your
   collection?

Teisco: You mean bottom of the heap. That would be my Murph arrow-shaped, or
   heart-shaped, electric 12-string.

Cosmik: Which ones end up getting played the most?

Teisco: Still the Jazzmaster, my Baldwin "Double 6" 12-string, the Guitorgan,
   my Vox Mando-Guitar, and various Danelectros.

Cosmik: Is there anything that you still covet out there in pawnshop land?

Teisco: Not really. I'm usually blown away by something I haven't seen
   before.

Cosmik: Who are the current Nut-Rockers, or do you still use that name?

Teisco: Lisa Pankratz on drums, who's been in the group three years; Casper
   Rawls, an incredible guitarist who's been with me almost nine years; and
   bassist Kevin Smith, better known as the guy on upright with High Noon,
   who's been with us since the beginning of the year.

Cosmik: Will you be touring this year?

Teisco: I sure hope so. Kevin and Lisa also play with Ronnie Dawson, so we're
   doing some shows on the same bill and hope to do more.

Cosmik: Who are some of the people on your A-list of musicians you'd like
   to record with in the near future?

Teisco: I'm hearing more percussion for the next record, in addition to
   drums. There are some players from Austin's well-hidden jazz scene who
   I'd like to work with--combining their sensibilities with my lack of
   same--and I'd love to work with C.C. Adcock, my buddy from Lafayette,
   Louisiana.

Cosmik: What's your personal favorite track on "Music For Lovers?"

Teisco: "Twango," I think, because I'm proud of the tune, and because it's my
   nod to Duane [Eddy], my friend and idol, and the late Steve Douglas, his
   sax man--and mine on The Many Moods.

Cosmik: Were there finished tracks from those sessions that didn't make
it on to the album?

Teisco: No, I knew what tracks would add up to the album I had in mind while
   recording them.

Cosmik: Will there ever be Teisco Del Rey Box Set?

Teisco: Instead of my boxed set being a collection of all my stuff at some
   point, I'd like to just go into the studio and stay there until I'd
   recorded so much the new CD would have to be a boxed set. Probably ought
   to check with Upstart [Teisco's record label] on that.

Cosmik: You mentioned before that "Twango" was your favorite track on the
   new record.  The melody on that song is right up there with some of the
   classic surf melodies.  When you compose, do you think of that first and
   then work around it, or does the whole thing come to you?

Teisco: The melody just came to me, and that front part.  In fact, it came
   to me full blown.  A lot of that stuff is just sort of where your fingers
   fall on the guitar.  I don't know if I could write any song . . . I
   definitely couldn't write THAT song on a piano, hunting and pecking, or
   something.  It's an A minor thing, and it's just this little bass line
   that leads up to the A minor chord.  And when I wrote it, it sounded so
   realized that it kind of scared me.  I played it for several friends and
   said "do you recognize this?  Did I steal this from someplace?"  Sonny
   Landreth once told me that when he's doubt, he calls Marshall Crenshaw,
   because Marshall Crenshaw will know.  "Oh, you wrote 'Your Cheatin Heart'
   inside out," or something like that.  He'll know.  I called several
   friends and they said "naw, it does sound familiar, but I can't think of
   where it came from, so I guess that's a good sign."  So I said "I guess
   so.  I'll keep it."  It just seems to be a strong enough hook that it
   does sound like "well, I must have heard this somewhere."  But for the
   life of me, I've tried to figure out what it sounds like, and nothing at
   this point has come up, and I wrote it about three years ago.

Cosmik: Do you manage to stay out of "the industry" end of things?

Teisco: You can't, really.  I mean, on my little level it's a whole other
   thing, but you can't afford to be ignorant.  You have to know what
   publishing songs is about.  You have to know how to read a contract.  It
   took me two months to iron out this little recording deal with Upstart.
   Having my lawyer fax them and waiting to hear back.  A lot of it was just
   delays and stuff like that, but I'd just as soon get the money and go into
   the studio and be working.  And the funny thing is that these guys were on
   my side.  They came to me.  They liked what I did.  They wanted to license
   my first record, they wanted to give me a budget for the second record.
   That wins them points immediately.  I don't have to knock on doors and
   explain who I am and what it is I do, you know?  They got it, they
   understood it, they liked it.  But you know, a quote "standard record
   contract" . . . you basically give up everything.  So you have to start
   changing clauses and rewriting this and that to get back any kind of
   control.  And my attitude was, and still is, that if you start giving up
   control on any front, whether it's the cover art or the studio you choose
   to use, what songs you're going to put on the record, who's going to play
   on them, then it's not that big of a step to have some record company guy
   behind the board telling you "no, I don't like that note you played right
   there."  They have to take the whole ball of wax and trust YOU.

Cosmik: Do you feel comfortable with Upstart?

Teisco: Oh yeah!  They've got a lot of enthusiam and experience, and pretty
   hip musical taste.  They sort of set out to have a game plan.  As I sort
   of observed it, they wanted to build up their catalog so they weren't a
   little vanity label with a couple of acts, and then once they achieved
   that, build up the catalogs of each of those artists.

Cosmik: It's a very interesting catalog, too.

Teisco: Yeah!  I never thought I would be a label mate with Nick Lowe.  Or
   Reeves Gabrels.

Cosmik: Are you as big a perfectionist as it sounds like you are?  How many
   takes does it usually take?

Teisco: No way. There's a fine line between perfectionism and obsession--just
   ask Eric Johnson. It varies. "Dimples," from The Many Moods, was nailed in
   the first take, solos and all. "Kyla Vuotti" was all overdubs--me playing
   about 8 instruments, a big production. There is a point of diminishing
   returns, where the feel gets lost, especially on rhythm tracks.

Cosmik: I'd say that's something you've never been guilty of yet.  Well, it's
   time to wrap it up, so tell us the most important thing people should know
   about Teisco Del Rey?

Teisco: That he never refers to himself in third person.



-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


                A CONSULTATION WITH THE BRAIN SURGEONS
                       Interview by DJ Johnson


Growing up a "rocker" in the 70s, you had a lot of choices to make.  Would
you choose to follow the Grand Funk Railroad path of pre-grunge lifestyle?
Would you put on some tinted shades and do the T-Rex stumble as you tripped
on window-pane?  Or were you "heavy?"  Being "heavy" meant you probably had
the complete catalogs of two particular bands--Black Sabbath and Blue Oyster
Cult.  Sabbath was heavy by means of pummeling bass and buzzsaw guitar.  Cult
was heavy by means of attitude.  They could freeze you just as easily with
a ballad as they could with a rocker.  One of the wags at Rolling Stone once
said, and I'm paraphrasing here, that Blue Oyster Cult played with an attitude
that suggested they'd just as soon suck your blood as perform for you.

Albert Bouchard occupied the drum throne for all the years that matter in
BOC's history.  He left the band in 1982 and he has remained very active in
the east coast music scene.  Deborah Frost played drums with Flaming Youth,
one of the prototype "riot grrl" bands.  She is also a respected rock critic.
Al and Deborah met, married and formed a band.  The Brain Surgeons pick up
where Blue Oyster Cult left off (but don't tell the guys in BOC that they
"left off..." they don't know yet), painting soundscapes that are alternately
dark and liberating and light and frightening.  Frost's amazing vocal range
and her emotional delivery, along with Bouchard's technically brilliant
drumming and the skills of their bandmates, combine to make The Brain
Surgeons one of the most powerful units on the scene today.

This discussion took place shortly after the release of their second album,
"Trepanation."  


        *                *                 *                 *
        

Cosmik: Al, how many instruments do you play?

Al: On BOC albums I played guitar, drums, percussion, vocals and harmonica.
   On The Brain Surgeons records I played all of the above plus saxophone,
   Jaminator, Microjammer, the Legendary Albertron, slide, ebow and keyboards.

Cosmik: Was that you playing the killer harp solo on "Dr. Music?"

Al: No that was Mickey Raphael who is Willie Nelson's harmonica player.

Cosmik: Have drums always been your number one, or did you end up Blue
   Oyster Cult's drummer by circumstance?

Al: Drums give the most joy when I play them. I started as the piano player
   in my first band but quickly switched to drums when the opportunity arose.
   By the time I got around to BOC I didn't consider any other instrument.

Cosmik: You put BOC together, didn't you?

Al: BOC was not "put together." The band was an evolution from several
   bands that I formed with Don Roeser when we met at Clarkson University.

Cosmik: Was the lineup the same from day one?

Al: No. Fallen by the wayside were the guys from Soft White Underbelly: Les
   Braunstein-singer, Richard Meltzer-singer, Jeff Richards-singer/sax, Jeff
   Latham-organ/guitar, Jackson Browne-singer, John Weisenthal-guitar, Andy
   Winters-bass. There were a few groups before Soft White Underbelly, too.

Cosmik: Jackson Browne?

Al: Yes, THE Jackson Browne. We were a blues band back then and not really
   very hard. We did only his material but I did some wild arrangements of
   some of his early tunes.

Cosmik: I'm having trouble picturing this...How was he as a hard rock singer?

Al: His singing back then was not so great but he always wrote great songs.

Cosmik: How long did it take from first practice until first album?

Al: Soft White Underbelly was formed in fall 1967 and made two albums for
   Elektra. The first was never finished in 1969 and the second never released
   in 70. The we starved for another year and finally got a deal with Columbia
   and put out the first BOC album in early 72. So you could say it was four
   and a half years from first practice to first release.

Cosmik: The first three albums almost sound like a different band than
   everything from "Agents Of Fortune" forward.  Was there a shift in
   philosophy or maybe different influences like Patti Smith in the studio?

Al: We were writing with Patti Smith from day one . . . Baby Ice Dog, Career
   of Evil . . . so that was not a factor in our direction shift. But shift
   we did and it was quite conscious. We had discussed it as early as before
   the On Your Feet Or On Your Knees album. The first three albums were an
   aural painting of hell, BOC's Inferno, if you will. We eventually got
   tired of that and wanted the songs to be more personal, more real. Later
   we drifted back to the dark stuff but the hell-theme seemed corny to us
   after awhile.

Cosmik: When did it start to feel corny?  Cultosaurus Erectus?  Fires Of
   Unknown Origin?

Al: No we got tired of it around the Agents era. When we went back to the
   dark stuff, around Cultosaurus, we resolved we were not going back to the
   bad old days.

Cosmik: Did you think that had anything to do with Michael Moorcock's sci-fi
   themes, or did you like that direction?

Al: Yes I think that we were looking for lyrics. Eric was a fan of his and
   sought him out.

Cosmik: There were other phases, of course, but if you split everything
   into "pre Agents" and "post Secret Treaties," which era did you enjoy
   most?

Al: Actually it was the time in between that I was the most creative. If
   you're not including the last two years (94-96) then the post Treaties-pre
   Agents period wins hands down.

Cosmik: Maybe my memory is shot here...Wouldn't On Your Feet Or On Your
   Knees be the only release between those two albums?

Al: Maybe I'm not exactly answering your question. You seem to be talking
   about albums and I'm talking about a time period. That was a fertile period
   for all of us in the band.

Cosmik: In the sense that every member of a band brings their influences
   to contribute to the overall sound of the group, which element of BOC's
   sound was your contribution?

Al: Because my taste is so eclectic I think that my part of the sound is
   hard to pin down. As far as my influences, I was greatly influenced by my
   parents who were very industrious and organized. They did a lot with very
   little so I guess my major contribution was to supercharge everybody's work
   ethic. I either wrote the songs, brought the songs to the group, finished
   off songs that they couldn't finish or suggested the ideas for the songs
   that they did write--so I guess an argument could be made that my major
   contribution was as a writer for the group. The songwriters I was most
   influenced by were Bacharach-David and Leiber-Stoller, the former for their
   harmonic originality and the latter for their rhythmic originality.

Cosmik: How much of that do you think carries over to The Brain Surgeons?

Al: Well, my role in The Brain Surgeons is similar. The main difference is
   that these guys are funkier, funnier, more cooperative and they can learn
   the songs much faster.

Cosmik: Expand on that for us.  What are the strengths of your bandmates?

Al: Deborah's strength is the depth of her emotional range as a singer.
   Compared to her, most of the other singers I've worked with seem monotone.
   Billy Hilfiger's strength is rhythmic solidity, [the] chunky, manly way he
   plays guitar. Another strength of Billy's is that he is almost the opposite
   of Pete.  Pete's most obvious forte is raw speed. He can sweep pick and
   shred with the best of 'em but what he really likes to do is play
   perverted, sick melody lines. Pete is one of the funniest humans I've ever
   met. He's actually put everyone in the band on the floor with some of his
   routines. David Hirschberg's strong point has more to do with his attitude.
   He is totally enthusiastic about anything we do. He really is like a
   little kid with a new toy. He's a jammin' fool and a great all around
   musician. He plays killer sax, also.

Cosmik: There are a few nods to BOC on the new Brain Surgeons album, the
   most obvious being the section from "Cities On Flame" that you played as
   "Night Of The 1,000 Guitars."  You wrote "Cities On Flame."  Is this a way
   of showing that that power came from you?

Al: That wasn't the idea at all. I just wanted The Brain Surgeons to stake a
   small claim on "Cities" that we could make our own. I hate the idea of
   being a cover band--or even worse, an oldies act!

Cosmik: Are you still friends with the rest of BOC?  Do they come to your
   shows?

Al: Unfortunately no and they never have.

Cosmik: What do you remember as the best of times with them?

Al: The time when we were getting the material for the first album together
   was very exciting. Some of the stadium gigs later on were pretty awe
   inspiring. When we first got the lasers they were lots of fun. Sometimes
   before shows in the late 70s I used to sit in my room and do charcoal
   drawings and get into the idea of becoming an artist and those were good
   times. I got to meet and jam with some great musicians and those were times
   I'll never forget. Muddy Waters/Francis Clay(his drummer) Chuck Berry, Jimi
   Hendrix, Mahavishnu Orchestra, David Bowie, Bruce Springstein, Ramones,
   Ozzie, Iggy, Bob Seger, Charlie Daniels, Richie Havens. I looked up to
   these people at the time and most of them turned out to be pretty warm
   loving individuals when I met them.

Cosmik: If you had to pin it down, which of those jam sessions was the most
   exciting and memorable for you?

Al: If I had to pin it down I guess I'd vote for my first brush with the
   famous, the time we opened for Muddy Waters at the Third Annual Blues Bag
   at the Cafe Au GoGo in New York City.  That was incredible to me.

Cosmik: Which albums are you the proudest of?  And which specific tracks,
   too?

Al: They're all like my children and some I may favor more than others at
   times but I'm proud of all of them, except for maybe a couple that you'll
   have to pry harder to find out.

Cosmik: Alright, I'll pry.  You already said you thought the later records
   had some corny material, and of course you were getting ready to bolt
   around the Fire Of Unknown Origin period...Am I getting warm?

Al: No, the song I most don't like is "You're Not The One" from Mirrors. That
   song was a little joke that wasn't supposed to be recorded. My only
   consolation is that it was about the producer, Tom Werman, who I was never
   very impressed with. I think he ruined the good stuff that was on that
   album too.  Also, my leaving BOC came out of the blue as far as I was
   concerned. You might say it was a little surprise that my colleagues
   cooked up for me.

Cosmik: Check my memory on this.  You were gone by the time Revolution By
   Night came out, correct?

Al: After putting everything I had into the production of Fire of Unknown
   Origin (which was the last successful BOC album - coincidence? I think not)
   my reward was to get sacked!

Cosmik: Were you around for the writing process for Revolution?

Al: I was working on Imaginos when they made that record. I was not involved
   in any aspect of it.

Cosmik: So you left the band in 1982.  What did you do then?

Al: Imaginos for five years.

Cosmik: Deborah, you were a big league rock critic and as I recall you
   weren't into pulling punches.  Now you're getting out there and fronting a
   hard rock band.  Do you ever feel like the cop who gets sent to prison?
   Are the critics and the peers ever a touch hypercritical because of what
   you used to do?

Deborah: A lot of people seem to labor under the false impression that I'm
   a rock critic who suddenly decided to put down my pencil and pick up a
   guitar. The reality is that I played in bands long before I ever became a
   rock critic. It was sort of an accident that for a while my writing about
   music took precedence over my playing music-- but  that was largely because
   I didn't really find the right collaborator until I began working with
   Albert. And rock is really a process of collaboration, no matter how
   talented the individuals are. Would Lennon have evolved without McCartney?
   Jagger without Richards? And so on.

Cosmik: I think a lot of people will be morbidly curious about this one...
   Did you ever write a slam-job review of Blue Oyster Cult?

Deborah: No. But I would never describe anything that I wrote, no matter
   how incompetently it might have been edited, as a "slam-job." I've written
   positive reviews and negative reviews and mixed reviews for
   countless publications. But I actually never wrote about BOC--I may have
   referred to them in some other context, though.

Cosmik: Do you plan to get back into writing anytime soon?

Deborah: I've never gotten out of writing. I just contributed two essays
   that I'm pretty happy with to a book Rolling Stone Press and Random House
   are publishing in February of '97. But I'm not interested writing about
   things that mean nothing except a paycheck to me or filling the spaces
   between ads, which is all most corporate mags require at the moment. Of
   course, the ads are getting even fewer, which says that the readers aren't
   as stupid as most of the editors of these glossy pieces of crap.

Cosmik: How did the two of you meet?

Deborah: Helen Wheels, who co-wrote Blue Oyster Cult songs like "Tattoo
   Vampire," and "Sinful Love" with Albert, and "Nosferatu" and "Celestial the
   Queen" with Albert's brother, Joe, introduced us. It's really funny,
   because when I was in Flaming Youth, Helen hung out with couple of the
   other girls and was interested in having us be her back-up band. I said,
   "We are NOT back-up musicians!" and was so insulted that I refused to even
   discuss it with her. 20 years later, we both found ourselves into a
   different kind of heavy metal at the same body building gym and got to be
   good friends. She told Albert she knew someone he'd really hit it off
   with--and I think we've all been surprised ever since at how right she was!

Cosmik: You played drums with Flaming Youth.  Do you ever get the urge to get
   on the kit with Brain Surgeons?

Deborah: Well, I occasionally do. But only because Albert makes me!

Cosmik: Do you find it difficult to balance rock and roll and parenthood?

Deborah: I think that we probably share the same problems as any other
   working parents. But I think that children, as proud as we are of them,
   are really a very personal topic--and should probably stay off the record.
   But I'm sure that they have the same deal with us as any other kids have
   with their parents-- you know, that eventually the truth will be revealed
   that somehow they were really dropped off here by mistake by Martians.

Cosmik: Wow...I thought that was just me. Okay, then, let's talk about the
   new album.  First of all, what does the title, "Trepanation," mean?

Deborah: It's a rather primitive operation in which a hole is drilled in
   the skull. The idea is to relieve pressure on the brain. There's actually
   some kind of society in England-- people who want to make trepanations
   available on demand to the public. We thought it was appropriate.

Cosmik: You're both listed as producers.  Was that as difficult as it sounds?
   How hard is it to compromise on those occasions when you're pretty sure
   your way is right and the other one has the wrong idea?

Deborah: Actually, we fight a lot more about simple every day things--like
   who's gonna take out the garbage--than aesthetic issues. After a couple
   hearings, what makes it  sonically--even if the idea originally seemed
   pretty out there to either one of us--is pretty obvious. Who's gonna be
   in charge of dinner, on the other hand, is really something to fight about!

Cosmik: Who's responsible for the huge sound on "Stones In My Passway?"
   It seems like building that kind of vast soundscape is a lost art now.

Al: From 1988 to 1992 I produced a number of recordings for other artists,
   Head Up, Maria ExCommunikata, Kablamachunk! etc. During that period I
   worked with a talented young audio engineer named Paul Special. When I
   started recording The Brain Surgeons I tried to get Paul involved in the
   project but he
   was always too busy. When we were doing Trepanation I sent him a cassette
   of the rough mixes and he faxed me instructions on how he would mix each
   song. All the mixing moves on "Stones In My Passway" were his ideas that I
   used. I'm happy to say that he is very involved in the new Brain Surgeons
   album, currently under construction, also.

Cosmik: How hard was it to translate what he wrote in the fax into an actual
   sound?  Was he real specific with EQ's and fader levels and everything
   else?

Al: Paul was specific as far as he could be.  He'd never worked on my board
   at that point so it was like "make the drums clean and shiny with a touch
   of reverb. Use any one of Robert Plant's solo albums as a model."

Cosmik: "Stones In My Passway" is one of Robert Johnson's lesser known tunes.
   Is that one of the reasons you chose it?

Al: Well, yes, that's part of the reason. I bought the Robert Johnson box
   set and I set about learning a bunch of the songs. That one struck me as
   being typical of the quirky vibe that Johnson produced that nobody else has
   been able to recreate so I thought I'd give it a try. The lyric reminds me
   of a reoccurring nightmare I had as a child.

Cosmik: Wouldn't that make it kind of uncomfortable to do?

Al: Yes, but it also gave it an edge. I look at it as exorcism.

Cosmik: The instrument that starts that one off sounds like it might be a
   piano with the string being plucked.  Go ahead . . . how far off am I?

Al: That is the Legendary Albertron which is an instrument I made myself
   out of 2x4s, 1" pipe, and old guitar parts. I made it after I saw a guy
   named Glen Brancca play at St. Mark's church in the village in 1983. It's
   played by striking with chopsticks and has sixteen strings tuned to
   different chords. It's sort of like a electric hammer dulcimer.

Cosmik: It has a great sound!  Will it be used on the new album?

Al: Maybe if it sounds good on any of the songs. Actually we've finally
   recorded the song I made it for so I think I should use it on that.

Cosmik: Another one with a huge sound is "A Kiss Is A Promise."  Your brother
   turned in a nice mandolin part on that one, too.  Do you get together with
   Joe and jam very often?

Al: Yes we play on many occasions outside of The Brain Surgeons and he has
   come to six of our gigs and usually sits in with us for at least a couple
   songs, sometimes the whole set..

Cosmik: I thought the lyric in that song was pretty chilling.  Was that a
   true story?

Deborah: I don't sing anything that does not resonate with some kind of
   emotional truth for me.

Cosmik: Were you playing "Ramblin' Rose" live before you ever recorded it?
   I ask because the energy and the flow is like a live song.

Deborah: I was as much an MC5 fan as Albert, and if he hadn't already done
   "Kick Out the Jams" with his old band, I probably woulda insisted on
   covering it. Albert and I used to play this together in the living room all
   the time. And when Fred Smith died, we were supposed to play CBGB like the
   next night, and although I woulda liked to do one of his original tunes to
   honor him the way I simply felt compelled to, I think the recording of this
   showed him at his finest frenzy. And we could teach it to the band at sound
   check. And then we recorded it, boom boom boom, maybe a week later. So
   you're right, it does have that genuine live feel. But more important, we
   hope it captures the heartfelt spirit that was intended-- that of a tribute
   to Fred Smith. And God bless Wayne Kramer. 'Cause irregardless of the
   tensions between them, which were probably no different than those that
   tear apart every band, he's still very much alive and kickin' out the jams.
   And more power to him.

Cosmik: Is "Ramblin' Rose" one of your more popular tunes?  That little
   stutter is pretty sexy.

Deborah: Thanks. We don't do it as much as we should live-- maybe because
   we just haven't found the right place for it yet. But I think what's
   interesting about what we do is each listener's personal response. Everyone
   has his or her own favorite tune-- and they're not necessarily mine! But
   it's usually pretty interesting. Can't wait to hear your take on the album
   we're recording now. Some of these tunes are really different!

Cosmik: That brings me to my personal favorite track, "My Civilization." A
   pretty dark view of modern society.  The way the vocals are layered
   reminded me a little of "Dominance and Submission."

Al: I had never thought of that until you asked the question. Now that you
   mention it it does have that trade-off feel to it. Really I'm just making
   songs that we all can have a little solo spot to do our thing in. I want to
   utilize the different personalities.

Cosmik: Who's doing what in the chorus section?

Al: Pete does the smooth harmonies, I do the 'Gimme Nothins' and Deborah does
   the wisecracks in-between.

Cosmik: "Shakespeare in cyberspace - free as a feather - animating emergency
   for your dining displeasure."  If you don't find it too strange talking
   about your lyrics, what does this one mean?

Deborah: Actually, it's one of the more personal lyrics on the album, and
   it probably holds much more significance, not to mention genuine amusement,
   for Albert and myself than for anyone else. But for your purposes, let's
   just say it means exactly what you think it does.

Cosmik: Aw, don't do that to me.  I have an overactive imagination and this
   song scares me as it is, which is probably why I love it.  I hear it as a
   verbal spanking for a corrupt society.  Is it really that simple?

Deborah: Well, to paraphrase our friends in the Canadian band Spackle, let
   your imagination do the spanking. 

Cosmik: Question is, does it play in Poughkeepsie?

Deborah: Sure, to quote my friend Robert Plant, as long as they're not
   spanking while spilling their vichysoisse.

Cosmik: I read a review of your first album in which the writer pointed out
   that your music FEELS like classic rock in the best sense of the word.
   A lot of people would buy it for that reason while some people would see
   it as a liability.  How do you feel about that kind of reaction against
   classic rock?

Deborah: The real problem is that classic rock is an oxymoron. As for
   people who won't buy it--actually, I'm really more concerned with people
   listening to it--if anyone's got a problem with labels, then he or she's
   a different kind of moron. Labels are something to stick on designer
   jeans--not that my Tommy Hilfigers ain't the comfiest things I've ever
   worn. But labels have nothing to do with music. They're a marketing device
   for people who, from the record company standpoint, are too stupid and/or
   tone deaf and tasteless to have any real convictions or too lazy to do any
   real work. And the same goes for the consumers who are dumb enough to fall
   for 'em. Would you have listened to the Rolling Stones if you were so
   concerned  about the label? Or the Beatles? James Brown didn't need a
   label. Neither did Aretha. Or Brian Wilson. They just opened their mouths.
   All you had to do was hear.

Cosmik: I always want to sneak a look at people's record collections.  What
   do you both listen to for kicks?  New and old.

Deborah: Honey, you couldn't sneak anything at our record collection-- it
   covers walls. We have a lot of weird things for a lot of even weirder
   reasons. Depending on our moods, we listen to classical, rap, jazz.  But
   it depends on our moods. Of course, what happens in pop music is that after
   you've been doing it for a long time, even when you hear something that's
   pretty clever, you know exactly where it came from. You appreciate the
   craftsmanship, but it's hard to be knocked out by the utter originality.
   There aren't too many brand new people who totally amaze me. I think the
   most innovative developments are probably happening on the urban front--I
   love that cover of Roberta Flack's "Killing Me Softly."  Annie Lennox's
   cover of "Train in Vain" was a great piece of work. I wish she had some
   new original tunes that were as good as those covers. For old stuff, I
   might listen to Aretha. Or Al Green. Otis Redding. This is the music I
   really love. But most rock stuff, I've heard it so much, I don't
   necessarily have to put it on the record player, I can hear it in my head.
   You can't imagine how many times I listened to certain records when I was
   a kid--over and over and over. But it depends on my mood.  Right now,
   we're working so much on our new record, that when the tracks aren't
   blaring, I just want silence. But it changes from day to day.

Cosmik: Is there a tour in the works?

Deborah: We're playing all over the place. Our dates are usually posted on
   the Brain Surgeons web page or the BOC-L discussion group.

Cosmik: What's next?  Do you already have material for the third album?

Al: We have recorded 17 basic tracks for a new album of which we'll pick
   the best ones and finish them off by the summer.

Cosmik: I have no excuse for asking this, but after seeing BOC six times in
   the 70s and early 80s I've just got to know...Do you still have the
   Godzilla mask?

Al:  No, Rick Downey lost it! [Ed.Note: Downey replaced Bouchard in BOC]

Cosmik: Is there some irony in there somewhere, ya think?

Al: Of course, it's perfect.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

  
                 T H E   E N D   O F   M O M U S ?

             An interview with Momus - by Keith Gillard
                    *       *       *       *       *


 "Trust me, I'm a music journalist - a specialist in the ailments of
 the Momus."

 Born in the town of Paisley, early 1960, Nick Currie is better known as his
 most famous character, Momus, a name he borrowed from the Greek god of
 mockery, the "critic of the gods".  Ten years, ten albums.  Huge followings
 in Europe and Japan.  So why aren't people familiar with Momus in North
 America?  Only one of his records has ever been released stateside.  And why
 is that?

 Answer:  Momus is not a "commercial project" (although he has scored
 commercials).  Throughout the 80's, he explored the realms of taboo subject
 matter - beautifully, seductively, poetically.  He wrote about such stuff as
 necrophilia, cannibalism, pedophilia, masturbating animals, prostitution of
 siblings, God's perversions, etc. etc. etc... - and he made them beautiful,
 even erotic.  And, of course, disturbed several people in the process.
                                                                                                                                             
 Many people just didn't "get" Momus.  Take New Music Express columnist Betty
 Page for example.  1991's Hippopotamomus was the peak of Momus' "taboo"
 period, and she didn't take it very well.  Here are some quotes from her
 review: "It now seems beyond all reasonable doubt that Nick Currie is a
 perv; if not in deed, then certainly in mind...Momus is a bit like a mussel:
 it tastes good when swallowed whole, but examine it too closely and it looks
 as disgusting as a shrivelled, unidentifiable piece of sexual organ. Spit it
 out immediately."  She even went so far as to suggest that Momus' thoughts be
 "suppressed."  However, in the same article, she described the music of
 Ventriloquists and Dolls as being "a dramatic sweep, like the Pet Shops at
 their grandest" - yet she still rated this brilliant album a zero.

 Contributing to this misunderstanding of Momus' work were his frequent
 cultural and literary references.  His works refer to Gide, Bataille, Nin,
 Keats, Wilde, amongst dozens of other literary figures.  Many of his works
 are enhanced by (and sometimes require) a knowledge of these great writers
 or cultural figures.  Although this is in the tradition of great writers, it
 has, however, limited his audience in a world where ignorance seems prized.
 Ignorance has become our replacement for innocence.

 But Momus is not just about perversion and literary allusions.  Humour has
 also plaid an important role in his work, from the cynical and witty lyrics
 of Tender Pervert to 1992's The Ultraconformist (supposedly a "live" Momus
 recording from 1910), he has found ways to poke fun at himself as well as
 the rest of the world.

 But in the latter half of 1992, everything changed.  Voyager was released.
 Although recorded at the same time as  Hippopotamomus, this album was not
 about sexual perversion, nor was it obviously humorous.  It still had the
 cultural and literary references, the same dispassionate-yet-intensely-
 emotional delivery, the same gorgeous production, the same brilliant
 songwriting...  but it had something else as well.  A new direction, new
 subject matter, a new lyrical approach, a new . . . spirituality.  This new
 approach continued to 1995's The Philosophy of Momus, reviewed in this
 month's Cosmik.

 Why the change?  Where is Momus going with his new approach?  November saw
 the release of Slender Sherbet (reviewed in last month's Cosmik), an album
 revisiting Momus' past, revising and re-recording thirteen of his  classics
 from the eighties (with an emphasis on 1988's Tender Pervert).  Does this
 album commemorate the passing of the "old Momus"?  Will this album of closure
 enable Momus to better pursue his new directions and ideas?  Or is it the end
 of Momus altogether?  Only Momus can tell us . . . as he told me in this IRC
 interview from Tuesday, April 23, 1996:

                    *       *       *       *       *

 KG: "Momus is a mask that anyone can wear."  - How would you describe the
    Momus character?


 MOMUS: The Momus character is an amalgam of all my favourite writers'
    personas, people like Wilde, Mishima, Swift, Juvenal, Leopardi . . . I
    probably mentioned two Irish writers there because I was just in Dublin
    and Galway.

 KG: At the Cuirt literature festival?

 Momus: Yes. And I took the opportunity to see the Writers Museum in Dublin,
    as well as hear a lot of living writers reading (Paul Muldoon, Simon
    Armitage...)

 KG: But is the Momus character a "mask"?  People like Wilde are hard to
    separate from their characters?

 Momus: Well, Wilde created the ultimate mask myth with Dorian Gray. And I
    suppose Momus is closer to Gray than Wilde. 'Up in the attic I pick up
    the brush / Paint in the crow's feet, paint out the blush / The face this
    portrait is of is still capable of...'

 KG: If Momus is a mask that can be worn by anyone, how would you feel about
    someone else painting out that blush?

 Momus: God, I hope we're not going to start talking Turkle (Sherry, that
    is)! Or maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing. If someone else painted
    out that blush I'd say fine, but give yourself a new nickname. Momus is
    mine. Of course journalists are doing it all the time, and using the
    artist's name to project fantasies onto.

 KG: Like Betty Page?

 Momus: Yes, a fine example of painting a blush on there, I think!

 KG: She painted it a little thick... 

 Momus: What I liked about that review was its openness about her own sexual
    misgivings. She described sex as resembling 'unidentified bits of shell
    or muscle which look good but on closer examination should be spat out'.

 KG: I found her review highly amusing, actually! What has prompted you to do
    an album revisiting Momus' past?

 Momus: Money prompted me to make an album revisiting Momus's past. And it
    was an extension of the ideas of time travel I'd been playing with on
    Voyager and Timelord.
 
 KG: Or "London 1888"...

 Momus: Oddly enough, all my albums dip about ten years back for their
    inspiration. Like, on The Poison Boyfriend I was looking at the
    experiences I had when I was about 19. I just seem to need that amount
    of distance from pain before I can laugh at it. There has to be an
    objective relationship to one's own subjectivity. You've got to be half
    bully and half victim. Because, in one of the slogans I devised for the
    marketing of Circus Maximus, 'one man's martyrdom is another man's
    matinee'.

 KG: The time factor must also aid you in getting that ambivalent approach to
    the characters in your stories. Similarly, "see ugliness in every living
    thing" . . .

 Momus: When enough water has gone under the bridge you've had time to see
    your subject from ten different angles. It's the closest I get to Cubism.
    Momus, Moral Cubist!

 KG: You had done a version of "Right Hand Heart" which doesn't appear on
    Slender Sherbet.  Why did you drop it?

 Momus: It was ugly. I just did it live in its original acoustic version and
    it worked. But the recorded version was too busy with chattering
    sequencers.

 Momus: Hey, can we kick each other off this thing? When I do that (I kicked
    myself experimentally on a channel just now) I get a funny 'ouch' noise!

 KG: I don't think we can kick in a chat, but we could just close up the
    channel.

 KG:  You also included "The Gatecrasher" and "Hotel Marquis De Sade".  You
    had said earlier that you felt they were too gloomy.

 Momus: Yes, but I'm too gloomy. In fact I judge my own work more harshly
    than I ought to. Things grow on me much later. I normally hate what I've
    just done. Low self esteem.

 KG: Shouldn't you be the harshest judge of your own material?

 Momus: Being a good judge and being a harsh judge are different things. I'd
    like to know accurately what my work is like, but that's hard.

 KG: Do you use a third party (perhaps Shazna) to help judge?

 Momus: I think Shazna has trouble judging for the same reasons I do: she's
    too close. The best judge is someone who's never heard it and decides to
    buy my lyrics book because she's intrigued. Or someone attacking me for
    not taking a strong line against child abuse in 'The Guitar Lesson.'

                        *            *             *

 Momus: Playing on Friday night in Galway gave me little glimpse of how
    STRANGE my work is. Being that private in public, and expecting to get
    paid for it!

 KG: What material did you do?

 Momus: I had just about 40 minutes. I did all the heavy stuff about death,
    necrophilia, pedophilia, more death, breasts . . .It even shocked me
    . . .to hear it all together like that.

 KG: That kind of stuff'll get you kicked off America OnLine!!!

 Momus: Well that's probably why I'm not on AOL.

 KG: Is that mostly earlier material?

 Momus: Yes, in the 90s I mellowed out, tried to "put the leaves back on the
    tree,", to rediscover emotion and even attain innocence again. I pulled
    back from satire and reportage. I left London, about which I'd felt very
    ambivalent. Now I live somewhere I approve of (Paris) and write about
    different things.

 KG: You seem to be doing a good job of attempting to re-attain innocence.
    Voyager seems to be the landmark album in terms of subject matter and
    approach.

 Momus: How long can the foreign correspondent sit on the sidelines of the
    battle before he notices that he's getting spattered with blood? Or even
    that he is a part of the war, that it's being waged for his benefit?

 KG:  The voyeur . . .

 Momus: I felt implicated in the sleaze I was documenting. So I withdrew and
    discovered two things: Japan and the Internet. Or rather Japan discovered
    me. And I identified a shy and austere part of myself with Japanese
    culture. I wrote a lot of songs for Japanese girls, and in a sense became
    one.

 KG: How did that happen?  PGF?

 Momus: A pop star called Keigo Oyamada (Flipper's Guitar then Cornelius)
    picked up on the el record label which I'd been a part of. He played our
    stuff on the radio and created an audience in Japan for it.

 KG:  I have found that albums such as Slender Sherbet, being a summation of
    the past, often serve as landmark albums - a line dividing what is later
    seen as "old" from "new".  Do you think that Slender Sherbet will be such
    an album?

 Momus: It could well be. I've been thinking recently it could be liberating
    to draw a line across Momus and launch a new persona.

 KG: It's almost as though you did that (to some extent) with Voyager.

 Momus: It's scary when you look at artists careers and see that very few
    were relevant for more than about ten years. People like Picasso are
    exceptions.

 KG: If you get more than 15 minutes, you've short-changed someone else . . .

 Momus: You get a certain amount of press support and if that doesn't get you
    to specific velocity, you sink. A name change can give you a second
    chance, though.

 KG: What do you see as the future of Momus, or his next incarnation, then?

 Momus: Well, in a sense Momus is already someone else. She's called Kahimi
    Karie and she's a big star in Japan. I write about half her material.
    She's a Lolita, exotic and distant and rather cold and narcissistic.

 KG:  So will you invent a new mask for yourself?

 Momus: What I might do is just spin Momus out a little longer in a new
    medium, CD ROM.

 KG: Weren't you planning to do that for  Slender Sherbet?

 Momus: Yes, but it's likely to be ready for the next release. I'm learning
    the skills just now. And if you ask 'what will it be like, this CD ROM'
    I'd answer: rain, sex, a manservant, a goblin, a clock, northern-ness. . .
    I don't know.

 KG: Your website shows your interest in animation and multi-media, and you
    are involved in multi-media web work for Cherry Red.  Where are you going
    with this?

 Momus: With my own site it's like having a personality online which absolves
    me from having one offline. It's a golem which has devoured the real
    Momus in order to construct a dead bot on the net.

 KG: I'd like to ask you some more about your past:  How did you get involved
    with Derek Jarman's Blue?

 Momus: I was asked to contribute to Jarman's Blue by Simon Turner, otherwise
    known as The King Of Luxembourg. He was with me on el records in the mid
    80s then did music for many earlier Jarman films, starting with
    Caravaggio.

 KG: "I Am a Not Gay" certainly seems to fit in with the Momus character.
    Did you contribute anything other than the vocal on that track?

 Momus: The melody, the idea of making it mimic a football chant. Jarman was
    impressed, I remember him saying at the rushes 'That'll go down in
    history!' (I think he meant as the most fucked up and ambivalent coming
    out statement ever).

 KG: Oddly enough, it made me think of "The Lumberjack Song . . ."

 Momus: Ha ha ha! "He's a cock sucking lesbian and he's okay . . ."

 KG: Now all we need are the mounties . . . Another item you were involved
    in which I only discovered by accident was  Blender  magazine.  How did
    you get involved in that one?

 Momus: I met the founding editor, Regina Joseph, when she interviewed me
    just after Timelord. We shared an enthusiasm for new media and she asked
    me to make a theme song for  Blender, her magazine. In fact she offered
    me a job in New York at the end of last year and I almost took it.
    Momus's new persona was going to be a bratty ad exec a bit like Gibby
    in 'Dream On'. Then I backed out.

 KG: Is there any other material like this you've worked on?

 Momus: I've done some TV commercials in Japan. One for Menard make-up. It
    was the worst make up ad you'll ever see. Robotic Japanese maidens swivel
    towards the camera and pronounce ludicrous brand names.

 KG: How about b-sides?

 Momus: The best b-sides are on the single for "The Sadness Of Things" that
    came out last year on Cherry Red. "London 1888," "The End Of History" (my
    version) and "An Inflatable Doll" (a different version of "I Had A Girl").


 KG: If there were to be a tribute album dedicated to you, what songs would
    you like to see done, and by which artists?

 Momus: I'd like to hear Bruce Springsteen's version of 'I Was A Maoist
    Intellectual', Bryan Adams' version of "Bishonen" and of course Billy
    Joel doing "Cibachrome Blue."

 KG: Hahahahaha

 Momus: No, I wouldn't really like to hear tributes. Next thing you know I'd
    be in the Rock N Roll Hall Of Fame. Yuck.

 KG: You have previously stated your stance on drugs - "NONE WHATSOEVER".
    Does this still apply?  What about alcohol?

 Momus: I took a little space cake in Amsterdam last year. (Oh, and some
    great 'E Tea' which really buzzed me). And in Ireland I had some
    beautiful whiskey. It may be time to start discovering drugs. But I'm
    afraid of making the same profound statements as everyone else who's ever
    taken LSD or smoked crack or whatever. I think they make you less
    individual by relaxing you into some sort of anonymous blissed out state.
    It's taken my family countless generations to get this uptight. Why waste
    that?

 KG: One last question:  Would you like to write a full musical, for film or
    stage?

 Momus: I think I'm much too introverted to be able to write "Les Miserables"
    or "Cats 2". My work is about masturbation, forbidden thoughts, guilt,
    and the private wealth of people trapped in their own fantasy worlds. It
    ought to be consumed on Walkmans or portable CD ROM drives, not in big
    theatres.

 KG: Private, personal art?

 Momus: So inward it's positively clitoral, I'd say. Sorry, I should say
    "vaginal."

                    *       *       *       *       *

 Momus maintains his own website at  http://www.demon.co.uk/momus.  Go visit
 it as soon as you're done reading Cosmik!

 MOMUS' DISCOGRAPHY

 1982 - The Man on Your Street 
 1986 - Circus Maximus
 1987 - The Poison Boyfriend
 1988 - Tender Pervert
 1989 - Don't Stop the Night
 1990 - Monsters of Love
 1991 - Hippopotamomus
 1992 - The Ultraconformist
 1992 - Voyager
 1993 - Timelord
 1995 - The Philosophy of Momus
 1995 - Slender Sherbet

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------


              POLITICAL PLAYBOOK: Featuring A Cast Of Thousands...
                              By Shaun Dale


"If I could not go to heaven but with a party, I would not go at all." 

   - Thomas Jefferson


During the lull between the primaries and the conventions we in the
punditocracy are left to flail about in search of a story. One of the
perrenial subjects is whether the U.S. is ready for a third political
party to challenge the Democrats and Republicans (though some wags wonder
if we're ready for a second party to challenge the Demublicans and the
Republocrats).  

There is, of course, already a third party. And a fourth. And fifth.  And
more.

A quick flick of the web browser came up with these:  

Conservative, Reform, Socialist, Democratic Socialist, Pacific,
Ameria, Communist, Revolutionary Communist, Peace and Freedom,
Constitution, Creator's Rights, Green, Socialist Workers, Libertarian,
Natural Law, Progressive Labor, New, Worker's World, Patriot, U.S.
Taxpayers, and the Pansexual Peace Party.  

I'm going back later to find out more about those Pansexual Peace folks.  

Some of these will appear on all or nearly all of the ballots in the 
country. Some will appear on none.

They all have one thing in common, though. Their Presidential candidates,
if they have one, will not be the next President of the United States. I'd
need a Cray just to calculate the odds on such a notion.  

The last new party to take the White House and establish itself as a long 
term national force was the Republicans in 1860, and they were basically a
replacement for the by then decimated Whigs.  The last third party candidate
to pick up an electoral college vote was George Wallace, running on the
American Independent line, in 1968.  Before that it was Strom Thurmond, the
State's Rights Party nominee in 1948.

Some of today's third parties, like the Socialists, have been around for 
decades. Earlier in this century the Socialists made a minor splash with 
candidates like Eugene V. Debs and Norman Thomas. Others are of newer 
vintage.  

The Libertarians have been around for a while, trying to convince Americans
that the path to political salvation is a toll road lined with waving
fields of legal pot which will be sold tax free. The leading candidate for
the Libertarian nomination this year is investment guru and author Harry
Browne. The highest moment of political glory in Libertarian history was a
1992 victory in the Dixville Notch, New Hampshire, primary.  Of course,
that's a feat that can be accomplished with a dozen votes or so, but a
win's a win.  

Among the interesting newcomers is the Natural Law Party, which entered 
the presidential contest in 1992 with Harvard trained physicist John 
Hagelin. Dr. Hagelin--now an official with Maharishi International 
University--is back, running on a platform which advocates a healthy dose 
of Transcendental Meditation as the cure for our republic's political and 
social ills. Dr. Hagelin could make history as the first President to 
levitate during the inaugural parade.  

The Greens have made organizational inroads in several states, and the 
California Greens have gathered some notoriety for offering up Ralph 
Nader as their presidential standard bearer. Of course, Ralph isn't a 
registered voter in California, and he allows as how he might just vote 
for Clinton in the long run even if he's running.  

Of course, this year we get a brand new choice, sort of. The Reform Party, 
an outgrowth of the United We Stand movement, will be holding a nominating 
convention around Labor Day. The biggest mystery around that convention 
will be whether H. Ross Perot will be nominated for President, or whether 
he will be nominated for both President and Vice President.  Whatever the 
outcome, Ross is not expected to do as well this year as he did in 1992, 
and in '92 he didn't get a single electoral vote. 

Those Electoral College votes, of course, are part of the challenge for
third parties. To get those, states have to be won. The candidate with a
plurality takes all the electoral votes from the state. The others,
whether a strong second or weak third, get nothing for their efforts. 
Like it or not, the Electoral College benefits the two strong parties in
this country and the only way to change it would be a Constitutional
Amendment introduced in the Congress controlled by those two parties and
passed through the various state legislatures controlled by, amazingly
enough, the same two strong parties.  

I'm not holding my breath.  

Another problem is ballot access. In order to get on the ballot, the various
"third" parties have to maneuver the ballot access requirements of the
fifty states. These have various requirements including, but not limited
to, filing petitions, holding nominating conventions and maintaing a
minimum vote threshold in previous elections. It requires either the long
term efforts of a committed band of idealogues or the financial resources
of, say, a billionaire Texan. The rules are made by legislators who,
wonder of wonders, almost invariably belong to one or another of the two
strong parties and who seem shockingly reluctant to ease the introduction
of greater competition for their jobs.  

As the quotation I opened with shows, Jefferson and most of the founding 
fathers disliked and distrusted political parties. There is no mention of 
parties in the Constitution. Our first President, George Washington, was 
elected without a party.  But the first parties, or "factions", as they 
were called, appeared in the first Congress. The Democratic-Republicans 
looked to Jefferson for leadership and the Federalists rallied behind 
John Adams and Alexander Hamilton.

Todays Democratic Party traces its lineage back to Jefferson's faction.
The Federalists collapsed in favor of the Whigs, who gave way to today's
Republicans.  There have always been other parties - the Populists,
Greenbacks, Know Nothings, Anti-Masons--even the Women's Christian
Temperance Union offered up candidates for the ballot. Colorful names and
quirky ideas abound in our political history.  But there have always been
two of real import - the Democrats and the other guys - and barring
structural upheaval of monumental proportion, there probably always will
be. Our form of republican democracy seems to be hardwired for two strong
parties.  

There will be a lot of voices in '96, but in the end there will be two 
choices with a shot at the White House - Bill or Bob.  There will,
of course, be the opportunity to cast a "protest" vote, which may or may not 
be "throwing your vote away." For those so far removed from the
mainstream of the American political spectrum that they really can't see
the ideological chasm that separates Clinton and Dole, there may be no
other visible choice except the minor party candidates.  

But there won't be any minor league teams in the World Series this year, 
and there won't be a third party in the White House either.  


*Scoreboard* As I write, Clinton is up in the polls about 20% and is 
especially strong in the states with the bulk of the electoral votes 
needed for victory. Meanwhile, the Dole campaign is besieged by criticism 
from Republicans who are already proclaiming "It's not my fault" in 
anticipation of a November defeat.  

Can Clinton pull a Bush and snatch defeat from the jaws of an apparent 
victory? 

Sure.  

Next month we'll try to figure out how. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
                                                 
                              
            READ THIS ARTICLE OR WE'LL SHOOT THIS DOG!
          (The National Lampoon Radio Hour Rides Again)

                        By DJ Johnson

Everybody, get in line!  Here's a box set that is sure to offend everyone.
I was offended twice!  It's a very personal experience--one that can even
desensitize, if you're lucky.  So get rotten for three hours or so and listen
to "The Best Of The National Lampoon Radio Hour: Buy This Box Or We'll Shoot
This Dog."

I remember reading National Lampoon Magazine when I was in high school and
laughing so hard I got dizzy.  Unfortunately, I was usually in class at those
times, and only one of my teachers shared my opinion of Lampoon.  He just
sort of disappeared one day.  Fuck 'em.  They could kick me out, but if they
wanted my Lampoon, they'd have to pry it from my cold dead fingers.  Well,
some things are worth taking a stand for.  And if they DID get it away from
me, there was something even better to look forward to.  

"The world's weekly wait is over!  Like magic, an invisible chain of sound
once more circles the planet.  The National Lampoon Radio Hour is ready
again to girdle the globe with giggles!"

With these words begins nearly three and a half hours of sick skits, vicious
parodies and bathroom humor from a comedy team that included future stars
like John Belushi, Christopher Guest, Bill Murray, Chevy Chase, Joe Flaherty,
Harold Ramis, Gilda Radner, Richard Belzer, Anne Beatts, Brian Doyle-Murray
and so many more that I have to stop now before this becomes a two-parter.
Welcome to the most dangerous box set on the planet.

The radio show was first done under the direction of the late Michael
O'Donoghue, best known for his "Mr. Mike's Least Loved Bedtime Stories"
skits on Saturday Night Live.  From all reports, O'Donoghue, while truly
brilliant and twisted, was a major asshole to work with.  He carried a cane
and often used it to smash walls and other objects in order to make his
points.  After 13 episodes, he was out the door following an argument with
his bosses over . . . office furniture.  But what great episodes those 13
were!  O'Donoghue's mercurial personality, described in the liner notes as a
combination of Beatrix Potter, Oscar Wilde and Jeffrey Dahmer, translated
well into the often mean humor that made the radio hour what it was.  Rather
than take the easy way out and do an Ed Sullivan impression by the book,
O'Donoghue went on the air to over 600 stations nationwide and proposed to do
his impression of Ed Sullivan if he were being tortured by having 6-inch
steel needles shoved into his eyes.  "I think it would go something....like
this."  Moments later he began to scream hysterically.  I believe it was
Steve Martin who once said, and I quote, "Sometimes comedy isn't pretty."

The first star of the show, though he wasn't billed as such, was Christopher
Guest.  You probably know him as Nigel Tufnel, lead guitarist of Spinal Tap.
You know, the guy whose amp "goes to 11."  Here's the truth about Christopher
Guest: The guy's a genius.  His musical parodies alone would prove that, but
he also has his many characters and his great writing to back him up.  The
first Lampoon character to become an "audience favorite" was Guest's own
"Flash Bazbo, Space Explorer," an airhead for the ages.  While Chase, Belushi
and the Murray brothers may have been the higher profile players, Guest was
the glue.  He had so many voices that it could be hard to pick him out on the
radio.  Some of his best work is included on these three CDs, starting with
the Flash Bazbo bits and including shocking parodies like "The Gift Of The
Nazis," a gruesome swipe at "Gift Of The Magi."  In his version, it is the
story of an impoverished concentration camp official "who sells his electric
torture machine to buy his wife a new set of lead weighted thongs for her
whip, only to find that she has sold the whip to buy him a new pair of
electrodes for his generator."

Shortly after O'Donoghue's departure, John Belushi became the Creative
Director of the Radio Hour.  Under his direction, the program thrived and
grew into the hideous, dripping, festering open wound that we all knew and
loved.  The new mix began to gel.  Belushi's direction, Chase's straight-man,
Brian Doyle-Murray's too-in-control menacing psycho characters, Bill
Murray's happy-go-lucky hipster and Christopher Guest's one-man "cast of
thousands" created the foundation. An amazing cast of talented players popped
in and out on and around that foundation every week.  The National Lampoon
Radio Hour was like nothing else.  You expected anything and everything,
except normalcy.  It was chaos with a French tickler--roller derby with
bayonettes.

There was a sick honesty in the fact that no target was sacred.  Timex watches
were tested by strapping them to John Cameron Swayze and having thugs beat
him senseless.  The old "win one for the Gipper" legend was blown all to hell
in a skit in which the coach informed each and every player that they were
dying of various horrible diseases.  Volunteer's willing to help the folks at
a mental hospital were told they were wasting their time because the psychos
wouldn't remember the good deed anyway.  Clint Eastwood, Lee Marvin and
Charles Bronson (Steven Collins, Guest, and Chase) announced their
homosexuality on the air in stereotypical "flaming" voices.  It was the
casual attitude about it all, along with the shock of these tough-guy actors
talking about cross dressing, that set you up.  What knocked you down was
John Belushi, as the talk show host, trying hard to be polite but feeling
pretty certain that they must be joking.  But the thing that frosts this cake
was hearing them "out" all of the rough-and-tumble macho guys in Hollywood
one at a time.  It's so unfair.  It's SO un-PC!

Being offensive was part of the game to the Lampooners, a fact best
illustrated by a particular event that took place when Belushi and
Doyle-Murray wrote a very funny piece called "The Death Penalty."  Over 400
stations refused to play the show that night.  When one of the Lampoon brass
started bitching at Belushi about the situation, John turned and flashed that
classic Belushi smirk and said "you know, four hundred stations, that's the
record!"

If they didn't get you with the skits, they'd get you with the songs.  Guest
was as good then as he is now at coming up with twisted parodies.  In "The
Well Intentioned Blues," he pulls off a convincing Pete Seeger impression
as he sings what on the surface is an anti-discrimination song.  As the
lyrics progress, they become more and more ignorant and racist until he
actually sings "Oh, I wish I were a wetback..."  Nate Herman's hilarious Joni
Mitchell parody, "You Put Me Through Hell," and the late Tony Sheuren's
uncanny Neil Young impression, "Southern California Brings Me Down," are
included in the box set as well.  Too bad Tony Sheuren's insanely brilliant
John Lennon parody, "Tragical Misery Tour," isn't included, but you can't
have everything.

When the last track on disc three has run its course, you're forced to come
back to 1996.  Political correctness is once again enforced.  You are advised
not to leave these CDs in the workplace where someone may find them, play
them, clutch their chest and drop like a sack of potatoes.  You will be fired,
or worse yet, studied at length.  So save yourself the agony and only listen
to The National Lampoon Radio Hour at home.  Alone.  PC is a good thing.
Truly it is.  However, one needs to let their hair down and laugh every once
in a while--especially at themselves.  Lampoon made that easy, because it
didn't matter if you were black, white, democrat, republican, male, female,
mechanical or a disgusting bodily function.  Lampoon didn't discriminate.

How did it die?  Like this: 7-Up became their big national sponsor.  One week
they started the program off with "The National Lampoon Radio Hour is proud to
present 'The Impeachment Of Richard M. Nixon,' brought to you by the bottlers
of 7-Up, the Un-Cola."  The good folks at 7-Up were not amused.  They were
out of there before the stains dried on the mattress, leaving Lampoon high
and dry.  The cast made lots of jokes about "7-Up, the Un-Sponsor," but a
good sense of humor didn't change the basic fact that The Radio Hour was on
its last legs.  Just about everybody involved went on to bigger (if not
better) things.  It's hard not to miss those simpler days when you didn't
have to evaluate before you laughed.  "Buy This Box Or We'll Shoot This Dog"
is one hell of a time machine.


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LAUREL AITKEN - The Blue Beat Years (Moon Ska)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Laurel Aitken was one of Ska's earliest and most soulful stars.  He was
recording R&B tracks in Jamaica that had elements of Ska before Ska even
hit the airwaves, starting with "Roll Jordan Roll" in 1958.  Over the
years he recorded some great stuff, like "It's Too Late," "Jesse James,"
and "Zion City," but time has taken its toll on the original masters.
Many of them have either eroded badly or disintegrated completely.  Can't
think of a better reason to re-record the songs, can you?

Nearing 70 years of age, Aitken's voice is like fine wine.  His performances
are flawless and his band is right there with him the whole way.  The band
is partially made up of members of House Of Rhythm.  They live up to that
name, especially with bass/drum interplay on tunes like "It's Too Late,"
which is one of those sticks-in-your-head songs that you can't stop singing
in the shower.  There are two things I love about this CD.  One is the fact
that it gives Aitkens the chance to reach a new audience, which he richly
deserves to do.  The other is a simpler reason.  His music just plain feels
good to listen to.


THE ALLWOMAN BROTHERS BAND - Pay Back/Witch Hunt 7" (Sloth)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

The two sides of this 7 incher are so different it could have been two
bands.  The band puts out some pretty good punk on both sides, but on
"Payback," the vocals seem way too lightweight for the track.  Tanya Gordon
and Alisa Garcia harmonize all the way through it, and it sounds like The
Murmurs recording with punk musicians.  It's not terrible, but it sure as
hell doesn't prepare you for the flip side.  "Witch Hunt" has power.  Only
one of the girls is singing lead, and the voice is gritty and angry.  It
works.  It'll be interesting to see how this band develops.  As it is, they
are definitely worth a listen.  (Sloth Records: 133 - 16th Ave NW Calgary,
AB, Canada, T2M 0H3)


BEASTIE BOYS - The In Sound From Way Out! (Brooklyn Dust/ Grand Royal/Capitol)
Reviewed by Keith Gillard

Whoa!  The Beastie Boys do Blue Note.  This is some serious cool groove...
All instrumental versions of Beastie tracks, with some new tracks thrown
in...  All done in beautifully grooving flowing funk/jazz.

Honestly, I've always liked and respected the Beasties.  But I never really
loved one of their records until this one.  I never encountered one of their
records which I would actually go out and buy until this one.  Why?  Well, I
always felt their vocals got in the way of some very tasty funk arrangements
(the exception, for me, being "Sabotage," which I loved the vocal to as well).
But here, those sexy arrangements are taken for what they are, and here is
where the Beasties really demonstrate that they have learned to play their
instruments.

They are joined by keyboardist Mark Ramos Nishita, percussionist Eric Bobo,
and violinist Eugene Gore.  These are very tasteful players, and everyone
plays with that perfect mix of tight and loose that makes funk funk.  These
guests are given writing credits - even on some of the earlier Beasties
material.  This is very generous, as soloists and arrangers hardly ever get
acknowledged for their contribution to a piece.  My respect for the Beasties
is growing by leaps and bounds!

What do I like about this record?  Plenty.  Here goes a list of song
descriptions which are sadly lacking in meaning.  But listen to the record,
and they'll all make sense - trust me...

"Groove Holmes" starts us off with a sweet Jimmy Cliff organ-heavy
arrangement...  The wah guitars and keyboard work of "Sabrosa" are so
tastefully hep...  "Namaste" is dark and flowing, like a journey down some
subterranean river...  "Pow" pops you one right off the top, and the
decelerando halfway through surprises me every time...  "Son of Neckbone"
is a beautifully tight urban landscape...  "In 3's" does some very strange
things with time, and does them quite well...  "Eugene's Lament" is an Arabic
minor mode showcase for Gore's lovely violin soloing (and I think I spotted
an overdub in there)...  "Lighten Up" is a delicious 3/4 platter of bluesy
funk...  "Ricky's Theme" is a groove to get lost in, and "Transitions" is
another...

What are the weak spots of "The In Sound From Way Out?"  "Bobo On The
Corner," featuring Bobo's percussion, is both too short and lacking in real
musical content.  Perhaps that's why they made it too short!  But it's still
funky as hell...  "Shambala"'s sampled Tibetan monks are lovely, but the
piece takes a while to get going, and doesn't go far enough even when it
does.  "Drinkin' Wine" is a confused, half-forwards, half-backwards,
arrangement, although this is obviously exactly what they were trying to do
with it.  And I do like its dub elements.  Unfortunately, it falls just short
of gelling into a coherent piece.

Overall, I love that Blue Note approach!  And not just the arrangements are
done in that Blue Note style, but the design is, too.  The text and image
layout have that classic look to them as well, with the liner notes being
written entirely in French.  Bonus points for being gratuitously cool...

The Beasties have a very cool record on their hands here--I believe their
best.  Unfortunately, the commercial record-buying public at large is
unlikely to agree with me; instrumental albums, and jazz/funk in general,
have not really been chart toppers lately!  But somehow, I don't think that
this record is about money, and that's a great thing to see.  Now, what the
Beasties will have to worry about is other people making the real money off
this record from the great number of easily sampled beats and riffs!

	Songwriting:	6/10
	Production:	8/10
	Performance:	8/10
	Overall:	7/10



BLUEBEARD - Selling Point (Melodiya)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

When this one first jumped into my headphones . . .well, it didn't jump--It
kinda spilled.  "Ah, low-fi rock," thought I.  At the 1:03 mark, the low-fi
flew, the hi-fi jumped, and my coffee dumped into my lap.  Thanks for the
fuckin' warning, guys!  I forgave them real fast, though, because I was a
Bluebeard fan by the 2:09 mark.  These guys are heavy!  The sound is a little
to the left of Fugazi and the feel is a little to the right of Sabbath.  If
you're a fan of "maximum heaviosity," you know that's a damned fine spot.

The recording is great except for the fact that you can't understand the
lyrics in a lot of places.  Now, that's no big deal with most "heavy" bands,
but these guys seem to be singing about serious stuff (like domestic violence
and the plight of the Indian), and thanks to the bizarre way the booklet is
layed out (like a freakin' EYE chart for acid heads!) there's no way to find
out what they're saying.  The Beavis & Butthead types out there won't care,
but those of us who love a good lyric would hereby like to demand a web site
with Bluebeard lyrics.

Slamming bass and drums, spray-gun fuzzy guitars and a vocalist with a truly
killer voice make Bluebeard one of the best heavy bands to pop up in a long
while.  Selling Point should get them in solid with the heavy indie crowd.

(Melodiya Records - 2523 17th Avenue SW, Calgary, AB, Canada T3E 0A2.  Phone
 or fax (403)-246-8916.  E-mail heggw@cuug.ab.ca)



TRACY BONHAM - The Burdens Of Being Upright (Island)
Reviewed by David Fenigsohn

How far can one great single take you? Tracy Bonham is on a quest to find
out. The first track on her debut album, The Burdens of Being Upright, is
a near perfect alternative rock hit. "Mother Mother" begins with gentle
verses of a phone call back home before dissolving into an over-the-top
hysterical scream fest. It's haunting, memorable, accessible, and rocks harder
than anything Alanis has ever done. And, at least according the credits, she
wrote it all by herself. So why is most of the rest of the album so
forgettable? After connecting so effectively on the lead track, Bonham
proceeds to completely lose her edge, and offers up a half a dozen
essentially useless songs--no bite either lyrically or musically. Much of
the record is so clearly filler material one would be better off paying full
price for the single than plodding through a full length disc looking for the
other decent songs.

Its not that Bonham is without talent. After completely flopping on songs
like the coma-inducing "Brain Candy," she pulls out "The One," boasting a
quality hook and some fine guitar work. And "Bulldog," at least, can fall
back on a decent riff and a few good lines. Even at her worst songwriting,
Bonham is an accomplished and powerful singer. But though she boasts an
impressive range and a talent for stirring, emotive vocals, she can't save
generic angry-girl toss-offs like "Kisses." The ridiculous "Sharks Can't
Sleep" is a lyrical embarrassment, and the midtempo "30 Seconds" pounds
through all of two notes and a couple monotone verses without a single spark
of life. "Navy Bean" tries to be melodic rock and ends up neither, just a
series of unfinished ideas masquerading as a song. 

For their part, producer Sean Slade and a competent back-up band do a good
job with what they have to work with. The guitars are clean and clear, the
drum and bass pounding and rhythmic, allowing Bonham her best shot at her own
songs. One killer track, a good voice, and the sense to surround yourself with
the right people should be enough for a listenable record. In this case,
she's failed, but Bonham may well possess the talent to bring it together
next time around.
 

DREAD ZEPPELIN: The Fun Sessions (Imago)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Assuming that at least SOME of you haven't ever heard of Dread Zeppelin, I'll
give you a quick description.  They are basically a reggae-influenced rock
band that has made a career of covering Led Zeppelin songs in a reggae style.
If that isn't enough of a hook, here's another--the lead singer is an Elvis
impersonator who goes by the name Tortelvis.  Silly?  Yeah, but a lot of fun,
too.  When they perform live, this guy named Charlie Haj runs out onto the
stage frequently, handing towels and water to Tortelvis.

The Fun Sessions (the cover says Sun Sessions, with "F" scrawled over the
"S" in "Sun") is a collection of covers, as usual, only this time they're
covering The Who, Cream, CCR, The Doors, and a bunch of others.  The Who's
"Baba O'Riley" begins with Butt-Boy (I don't wanna know how he got his name)
jamming out the famous synth part on his guitar in a particularly rockin'
fashion, but when the vocals start, the beat shifts to reggae.  That's the
pattern throughout the CD.  My favorite track is "Sunshine Of Your Love,"
which really works as reggae, suprisingly enough.  My beef with this CD is
that many of the songs go on too long to sustain the joke. "Suite: Judy Blue
Eyes," for instance, clocks in at 7:06.  By the time it was over I felt a bit
less amused than I had been before it started.  The cover of "Freebird" is
almost as obnoxious as the original.  The one original track, "BBWAGS," is
fun for a while, but it goes on a bit too long as well.  The initials stand
for "Butt-Boy's Wearin' A Girl's Shirt."

If Dread Zeppelin would do shorter versions of these songs, I'd like it a lot
more, but by the 5 minute mark in a parody song, the joke is wearing thin.
On the positive side, this band is tight and talented and they really know
how to shift gears in the middle of a song.  It's also fun to hear covers that
are this far from the original sound.  Is that enough to make it worth
buying?  Depends on how much you enjoy the schtick and how much patience you
have.



DUB OVER DUB - 27 Track Dub Extravaganza (Heartbeat)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Reviewing a true Dub CD is tricky business.  For those of you who haven't
been indoctrinated, let me quickly explain that "Dub" is the term for music
which is basically taken from a pre-existing recorded track, and remixed with
pieces of the track missing, altered or dropping in and out.  It is usually
quite the mind trip.  The "artist" in the case of a dub recording is the
recording engineer.  In Jamaica in the 60s, it became common practice to
release a single with a dub version on the B-side.  Dub isn't exclusive to
reggae or ska, but that is where its roots lie.

"Dub Over Dub" is mostly the work of Errol Brown, an engineer who learned his
craft from the legendary Duke Reid of the Treasure Island label.  Not
surprisingly, Brown became a master himself.  26 of the 27 tracks on this CD
were mixed by Brown from tracks recorded for Sonia Pottinger's High Note
label, and they make a pretty good representation of his contribution to the
form.  Brown's style was psychedelic and fluid, built on momentum.  While
comfortably grooving along at a lazy pace on the bass and hi hat, he would
send a guitar echoing off in one direction, repeating at a slightly faster
tempo.  The feeling of surreal motion is intoxicating.  It's like a man
playing with a full-blown model railroad--making a dozen things happen in a
dozen places, each independant of but essential to the whole.  His use of
echo at the end of cut-off vocal phrases was just slightly different from the
norm.  It was subtle, but it was obviously noticed by bands like The Clash.

The musicianship is rarely mentioned when discussing a dub record, because,
as I said before, the engineer is the story.  In this case, however, it has
to be mentioned that the tracks Brown was working with were top notch to
begin with.  Robbie Shakespeare and Sly Dunbar were the bottom for many of
the tracks, and Ranchie McLean's guitar chops grace several as well.
All the musicians listed in the liner notes are respected players, and all
of the performances are right in the groove.  "Dub Over Dub" serves as a
solid document of Errol Brown's engineering skills, but more importantly,
it provides a chance to ride shotgun with the man as he explores the
psychedelic possibilities of these tracks.   


FIELD DAY - Enough For Two/Other Guy (7") (Melodiya)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Canadian punk band with power to burn.  They have a very fluid bassist with
great tone, and the rest of them are pretty damned good, too.  "Enough For
Two" is almost (here's that word again) "alternative," but the instrumental
break in the middle rocks harder than anything tagged with that label.  The
flip side is the story here.  "Other Guy" ignites in the first five seconds
and never goes out.  The drummer rocks his balls off on this one.  They'll
hate me for saying this, but if Blue Oyster Cult had been a punk band, this
is what they would have sounded like.  Mean, deep and final.  I recently
reviewed a CD called The Edmonton Covers Compilation, from Green Pepper
Records.  It was a kick-ass collection, and the first song was Feild Day's
hot 'n' punky cover of The Beatles' "Help."   Wonder what else they have
floating around out there?  If it's half as ballsy as "Other Guy," I want
to hear it. (Melodiya Records - 2523 17 Ave SW, Calgary AB, T3E 0A2, Canada.
E-mail heggw@cuug.ab.ca)


iT - Era Vulgaris (Minus Habens / Disturbance)
Reviewed by coLeSLAw

From the Godfather of Minus Habens, Ivan Iusco, comes a collection of
basement recordings done between January 1990 and June 1995. For those of
you who are looking to make a good buy but are not really sure what style
of electronic music you would dig, dig this! There isn't too much that isn't
explored on iT's first full-length CD. Ambient? Sure...iT can do ambient.
Industrial? I swear I heard a battered toaster somewhere in the mix. Techno?
As much as any I've heard. But what about that old-school style of keyboard
playing, like Thomas Dolby? There are tracks to please.

Some of the stuff on here made me grin sardonically, and I hope I won't
offend Ivan by saying that a few of these tracks ("Thessaloniki," "Nionica 
<Unknown Ratio>") would make great video game soundtracks. Especially in the 
world we live in today when most companies spend so much effort on putting
out a good game that they forget to keep the music up to par. In fact, I was
even thinking of suggesting that "Arentostrate" be submitted to Tim Burton
for the theme song to a demented claymation project.

Once again (is there a trend here I should know about?), there is a cut which
seemed specifically designed to hurt my ears. The title, however, was its
saving grace in that it clearly stated what it was--"Temporary Irritation."
See? You just need to read. What you don't know CAN hurt you. As with
Monomorph, this one aside was the ONLY track to be skipped (especially at
high volumes). For a better enjoyment of the industrial abilities of iT, I
would endorse "Combacterion" or "Cycloviran."

As far as the more dance-oriented "techno-y" side of the music goes, that as
well is far reaching through many genres. Cuts such as "The Measure Of A Dog"
sound as though they would have been raging club anthems half a decade ago
(that's a compliment), while tracks such as "Out Of Sight" would make an
equally strong impression today (so is that). I could have sworn I detected a
little Jean Michel Jarre hidden in the psyche there somewhere, as well as a
strong urge to hook a few of these songs up to a satellite in order to show
aliens how we dance here on the planet of sound.
	                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                


KEBABTRAUME -Neural Earthquake (Minus Habens)
Reviewed By coLeSLAw

Wonder if these guys ever had the chance to meet Skinny Puppy or Ministry?
Neural Eartquake is a sensory-exploding collection of tracks guaranteed to
make you want to slam into other people (very very hard), and jump up and
down in blissful youthful angst. Kebabtraume also features something I have
rarely heard on most Minus Habens releases--vocals. It is the vocals which
bring much of this emotion to life. Distorted, staccato shouts punch in and
out of the music, shouting out to the world whatever it is that they are
shouting out (but it certainly has conviction!).

One aspect missing from the CD format is the live-performance video
accompaniment performed by someone whose name I am unable to type with this
keyboard in text format. However, judging by the cover artwork and the
intensity of the music, I can guess that it would truly be a sight to behold.
The music, performed by members K001, K010, K011 and K100 provides a more
than adequate base for a multimedia concert event to be remembered (if not
for the show itself, then for the cuts and bruises).



B.B. KING -- Live at the Regal (Mobile Fidelity Reissue)
Reviewed by Steve Marshall

B.B. King's "Live at the Regal" is considered by many to be one of the
definitive blues albums. Its songs have been performed by countless other
artists. Captured live in front of a few hundred lucky fans at Chicago's
Regal Theater, the "King of the Blues" put on a stunning performance by
which all others would soon be judged. King's style of guitar playing has
been copied by just about every guitarist around.

Things get off to a lively start with the classic "Every Day I Have the
Blues," and they don't let up 'til the CD's over. The guitar work is superb
(yet never overdone) throughout the disc, and B.B.'s unique storytelling
abilities are unmatched. All it takes is one listen to songs like "It's My
Own Fault" or "How Blue Can You Get" and you'll see what I mean. Even King's
singing style has been copied. Anyone who caught Eric Clapton's recent blues
tours can attest to that.

B.B. has a great 6-piece band backing him on this November 1964 performance,
and he gives them due credit several times throughout the CD. Most of the
songs here are fairly short, so King doesn't get to stretch out much. "Worry
Worry" is an exception though. Largely an instrumental, (at least in the first
half), B.B. really cuts loose on this one. The separation on the CD is
excellent, due in part to the "primitive" stereo effect used when the show
was recorded. The instruments are either in one channel or the other.

Mobile Fidelity has taken a spectacular recording and made it even better on
their Ultradisc II release. The sound quality on the CD is breathtaking,
especially for a recording from this time period. Recorded direct from the
master tapes, it sounds like you're right there. Not content to reproduce
the concert in two 'sides' (like the album), MFSL released it uncut. All
the songs segue into each other. They also used the original cover art, not
the white and blue reissue. You say you want a lesson in the blues? This is
a great place to start. The only thing bad I can say about Live at the Regal
is it's too short. This is a great CD.



LOS LOBOS -- Colossal Head (Warner Brothers)
by Steve Marshall

One of the best things about Los Lobos is their ability to cover a wide
variety of musical styles on any given album they release. If you're a fan
of the band, you come to expect it. Colossal Head doesn't have the variety
found on their last album, but it does branch off in a few previously
unexplored musical directions. At times, sounding like a cross between the
band's eclectic spin-off group, Latin Playboys, and Was (Not Was), the new
CD takes a few listens to fully appreciate all the various nuances of the
music. Another thing the band has going for it (especially if you're a fan)
is that a lot of the tunes sound familiar. Not to the extent where they sound
like they're copying themselves--it's more a case where they take a riff that
"works" and then expand on it.

The first track, "Revolution," starts off with a bass line reminiscent of
War's classic "Low Rider." The CD's first single, "Mas Y Mas" is up after
that. The song sounds like it could be a Morphine tune, with screaming guitar
thrown in for good measure. "Everybody Loves a Train" and the title track
sound like outtakes from the Latin Playboys CD. The basic riff in "Life is
Good" sounds a lot like "Dream in Blue," from the band's excellent 1992
release, Kiko. Again, it sounds familiar, yet it's different. The Was (Not
Was) sound is readily apparent on "Little Japan." The track would fit
perfectly on that band's "What Up, Dog?" CD. The last track on the CD is a
bluesy instrumental called "Buddy Ebsen Loves the Night Time." The song
evokes a cool, sort of Texas blues feel, then ends abruptly--almost as if
the tape ran out during the mastering process.

Colossal Head is another one of those CDs that require a few listens before
you can truly appreciate it. Once you hear it a few times though, you'll find
the songs buzzing through your head for a long time. It's not as good as
Kiko, but definitely worth picking up.

MAN OR ASTRO-MAN? - Deluxe Men In Space (Touch & Go)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

This one is about two months old now, and in the world of this prolific band,
that makes it a golden oldie.  I was a little worried about MOAM several
months back when they put out a 7 incher that sounded tired.  I've forgotten
the name of it already.  Good news: All is well.  Deluxe Men In Space is
proof positive that the kids are alright.

There are six tracks, and two of them are 45-second sound effects.  I'm
reviewing the CD version, which times out at exactly 9 and a half minutes.
Here's what's unusual about this thing--It feels so damned complete!
"Maximum Radiation Level" is a powerful surf punker with some cool string
scratching by Star Crunch.  "U-Uranus" is a vocal track in the tradition of
"Destination Venus," but the lyric is so silly that the song can't be held
in quite the same regard.  It just doesn't matter, though.  It's a kickin'
rock and roll song.  "Super Rocket Rumble" sounds closer to traditional
surf than anything else on the CD until Star Crunch starts doing wild and
painful things to his guitar, instantly injecting a little punk attitude in
the process.  "Rhombics" is more of a jam than a complete song, but it stands
out thanks to Coco The Electronic Monkey Wizard's bass sound, which seems to
be one part low frequency to five parts gravel.

Man Or Astro-Man sounded tired on the last record.  Gee, I wonder why?  They
toured the US and a large part of Europe, lost a guitarist and broke in a new
one, came home and took twenty seven minutes off and then headed into the
studio.  Not that they don't ALWAYS work that way, but even aliens need
downtime.  Apparently the break is over.



MAN OR ASTRO-MAN?: Experiment Zero (Touch & Go)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Hey, another MOAM record!  Whodathunkit?  Yeah, I know: Everyone.  This
band makes records as fast as we can listen to them.  Some people bitch
about that, but I'm grateful.  They're almost always worth hearing, and
this one's no exception.  You vinyl collectors should get out there quick.
At least some of these have been released on transparent gold vinyl.  Got
one of those right here.  Intellectually, I know that gold vinyl doesn't
improve the sound, but just between you and me...yes it does!

There are 16 tracks on Experiment Zero, and while not all of them are
particularly stellar, the ones that do make the grade rank up there with
their best work.  "Big Trak Attack" is fun to listen to because it's built
around the beeping sounds of a Big Trak--a kids toy that was semi-popular
a few decades back.  "9-Volt" features the vocals of guitarist Star Crunch,
mixed in the now-traditional "far away" style they first used on "Destination
Venus."  Like that great song, the vocal in "9-Volt" is so distant that it
almost sounds like you're thinking it instead of hearing it.  They do the
same thing in "Anoxia," and it's even more effective because the music is
as eerie as the vocal.

Side two (did I mention this thing is gold?? Oh, sorry) begins with "Maximum
Radiation Level," which was also on the "Deluxe Men In Space" EP a few months
back.  It makes a great lead-in to this side, which is like an entirely
different album than side one.  This is the Surf-Punk side, filled with
power, attitude, chaos and the trademark sci-fi samples.  "Test Driver" is
one of the most explosive rockers they've ever recorded.  "Television Man,"
another vocal tune, is straight forward punk.  Kinda surprising.  "Z-X3"
shows how heavy they can be, a side of them that I'd like to hear more of,
and hey, guess what!  I got to!  On the next track, in fact.  "Principles
Unknown" is VERY heavy, and it contains some amazing sounds thanks to Coco
and his homemade Theramin.

Don't get me wrong--I like side one quite a lot.  But side two is classic
from start to finish.  Strong enough to make the entire record a classic.
Certainly jammin' enough to impress the hell out of earth dorks like me.



CHARLES MINGUS - Mingus at Carnegie Hall 
(Rhino R2 72285; Originally released in 1/75 as Altantic SD-1667) 
Review by Shaun Dale 

In January of 1975 Charles Mingus brought a new band to Carnegie Hall.  
Featuring Jon Faddis on trumpet, George Adams on tenor, Bunny Bluiett on 
baritone, Don Pullen on piano and Dannie Richmond on drums, they turned 
in a reportedly lackluster first set which languishes unreleased to this 
day in the Altantic Records vault. 

The two song second set was another matter altogether. 

Joined onstage by a stellar trio of saxaphonists, the group rallied and 
produced a historic jam. The guests were John Handy on alto and tenor, 
Charles McPherson on alto, and the immortal Rahsaan Roland Kirk on tenor 
and stritch.  

Side one is a  Mingus tribute to Duke Ellington in the form of an 
unforgettable "C Jam Blues."  While this extended version of the Ellington 
classic features many fine solos, Roland Kirk takes over in the middle 
and makes the piece his own.  

In a 24 chorus solo, Kirk demonstrates his amazing versatility and his 
incredible range of jazz scholarship as he pays instrumental tribute to a 
gaggle of sax greats, emulating the styles of giants like Sonny Rollins, 
John Coltrane, Illinois Jaquet, Dexter Gordon, and others. 

After additional breaks by Faddis and McPherson, Kirk sets up one of his
trademark drones, giving the other players room for a free jazz close that
seems to last forever, but not quite long enough.  

Side two gives us "Perdido", another classic, which Mingus once recorded 
in a definitive version with Dizzy Gillespie and Charlie Parker. The idea 
that the magic of that original could be recaptured by any band stretches the
imagination, but these players pull it off.  Each of the horns takes a turn,
with Kirk adding the stritch to his tenor solo. This track demonstrates 
everything that is implied by the notion of a jazz jam session, with each 
player pulling the band in an individual direction while never losing the 
central riff that makes "Perdido" one of the most recognized gems in the 
jazz repertiore. 

Interestingly, neither Mingus nor Richmond take a solo turn on either of
these tracks. Instead, they demonstrate the tremendous value of a solid
rythym section when a group of individualistic soloists get together,
providing a solid foundation for one of the most enjoyable jazz releases
I've heard in a while.  

Many thanks to Rhino and Atlantic for the cooperation that makes this 
available to those of us who missed it the first time around.  And to
paraphrase a note from an early Mothers release, buy this compact disk now.
Top Forty radio will never, ever play it. 
 
 

MOMUS - The Philosophy Of Momus (May 1995) Cherry Red Records
Reviewed by Keith Gillard

Momus discovers the home studio!

This is the second installment in a series of reviews of Momus albums,
covering all of them in reverse order of release.  If you're unfamiliar with
Momus, I direct you to this month's feature article and interview on him,
plus last month's review of Slender Sherbet.  Assuming you've read either
one of those, you should at least know something about him and his music...

"The Philosophy of Momus" is not one album:  It's two.  There is a rather
marked difference between the approach of the first eight tracks and the
unified sound of the last eleven.  It seems that this is the first album
Momus has produced with CD length in mind;  he also took longer to produce
it than any of his past albums (or there at least was more time between
"Timelord" and "Philosophy" than between any of the other albums).  So how
should I review it?  As one album or as two?

The first eight tracks are quite disparate, with a great deal of
experimentation in production and songwriting techniques.  Styles covered
include a distorted, lurching, fake-ass blues track ("Toothbrushead"),
trip-hop ("It's Important to be Trendy"), dance-hall reggae ("The Madness
of Lee Scratch Perry"), Kraftwerk ("Quark & Charm, the Robot Twins") and
Beck ("Withinity").  This first half of "Philosophy" is very experimental,
with Momus trying all kinds of new things.  I love it, but it's not as
listenable as the second half.

As for the second half of the album, it is much mellower, making me think of
Pet Shop Boys' Behaviour. The single "The Sadness of Things", co-written
with Ken Morioka, is gorgeously produced, with string swells like "Voyager"
and very emotional vocal delivery.  The cream of the crop, however, is
"Complicated," a lovely ballad a la Getz and Gilberto.  I have not been able
to get this song out of my head for a month.  Another great ballad is "I Had
a Girl," although its use of the drum loop from "Amongst Women Only" can't
help but make me think of female masturbation (which is what "Women Only"
was about).  The subject matter of "Slide Projector Lie Detector" is closer
to classic Momus than anything else here (except perhaps "The Loneliness of
Lift Music"), being the story of a retired spy with an embarassing collection
of naked polaroids from his past.

Criticisms:  Although the sequences are wonderfully produced, the guitars are
interestingly treated, and the vocal sounds are good, they don't seem to mix
together seamlessly.  On the first half of the album, this is understandable,
and seems deliberate.  But on the second half, this distracts from the smooth
musical production and emotional lyrical content.  Tracks which disappointed
me were "Yokohama Chinatown," in which the well-written poetry of the lyrics
is undermined by a confused and noisy arrangement.  The title track seemed a
little flat in its arrangement and delivery.

The graphic design (done by Momus) is unfortunately spotty.  I love the front
cover, but it seems somehow blurred, un-crisp.  The inset suffers, with its
fragmented lo-rez .GIF of Momus, a grainy uninforming black-and-white, and a
shot of Earth-rise as seen from the moon, covered with distracting moire
patterns. The text layout, as well, is uninspired.  Momus' graphic design
skills improved greatly over the course of 1995.

Overall, this is two great albums from Momus.  I like them both, but prefer
the second half.  However, I respect the first half more, because it's more
daring.  I recommend "The Philosophy of Momus" very highly.

Much more information about "The Philosophy of Momus" can be found at:
http://www.demon.co.uk/momus .  Momus maintains the site personally, and
it's well worth checking out.
 
	Songwriting:	9/10
	Production:	7/10
	Performance:	8/10
	Overall:	8/10



MONOMORPH - Subject to Electronic Control (Minus Habens/Disturbance)
Reviewed by coLeSLAw

From the first track, "New Life," I was in noise heaven. The disc begins with
a subtly dissonant yet melodic beat, shifting into a sort of hyper-trance
vibe, and finally dropping straight into a killer dance rhythm. Other cuts,
such as "High Generations" and "Chinese Flow" suggested some 808 State or
Orb-like influences. This entire disc has an underlying ambient feel,
occasionally delving into the gloomier realm of industrial techno on songs
such as "Sekuon Omo," "Moon" and "Therna Aeterna," as well as the glurpy
flanged out space-sounds of "Particlexia."

This album's sound would make me drool in a large club on loud speakers--
provided of course that the well-done yet sonically painful track "Loox"
was omitted. The sound that is ingrained into this tune sounds like a modem
logging on for nearly five minutes. Best to turn the volume down a bit for
this song (but then make damned sure you turn it right back up, because to 
miss the rest of this album would be blasphemy).

Although much of this album is fairly industrial in the pure gnashing grind
of the tones, its true beauty lies in its ambience, and it ends that way.
Not with a large climactic finish, but lulls you off to pleasant dreams with
fond memories of butt-bouncing and hallucinogenic fits.



NIGHTMARE LODGE - Luminescence (Minus Habens)
Reviewed by coLeSLAw

Comprised of the unique talents of Russolo and (yes) Ivan Iusco, Nightmare
Lodge fit their name well--almost too well. Like the dark church choirs of
Hell, these ten tracks are boiling over with a darkness that is only
surpassed by the sheer mystical elegance of its portrayal. Musically,
these songs reflect what it is in the human psyche that draws us longingly
towards all things evil and frightening. The use of synthesized string and
voice sounds brings the music into our own dimension, merging reality with
fantastical lands difficult to perceive as existent.

Perfectly described as "filmic" in the promo notes, all ten tracks could
easily belong to some avant-garde film noir of life in cyber-punk cathedrals.
Every note seems to be one of tension, keeping you in perpetual suspense for
the ultimate release from anxiety (which never does come). It is that feeling
which keeps the entire album listenable.  At all times you are kept inches
from relief, but the taste is bittersweet, and always seems reachable.

One of my favorite tracks, "False Light - Segment B", brings forth a vision
of what Dead Can Dance would be like in gloomier times. The final track,
"It Passed Like A Dream," sums up the entire experince of the disc--yet in a
somewhat more innocent, childlike way--finally fading away into an almost
busy-signal like tone placed there to remind you that your quest is not yet
over.



NIRVANA - Nevermind: Original Master Recording LP (Mobile Fidelity Sound Labs)
Reviewed by Cai Campbell

Mobile Fidelity continues to boggle my mind and earn my enduring respect when
it comes to their commitment to producing a high quality product offering
unparalleled reproduction of sound.  They have always selected classic,
exceptional recordings from all corners of the musical arena and delivered
them, via analog or digital formats, in a manner which allows the music to be
heard as it was meant to be: pure and unadulterated.

There is no exception with their treatment of Nirvana's 1991 classic,
Nevermind.  Yes, only five years old and this album is most certainly a
classic rock and roll record which I believe will stand the test of time.
Apparently, Mobile Fidelity agrees, or they would not have included this
landmark album with the very impressive and elite group which makes up the
entire Mobile Fidelity catalog.

Nirvana seemed to come out of nowhere in 1991, although they had been a very
popular underground band for years, especially after their 1988 Sub Pop
release, Bleach.  As the story goes, they recorded Nevermind as their next
full-length effort for Sub Pop.  Upon hearing the tapes for Nevermind, the
masterminds behind Sub Pop went nuts.  Their instincts told them they had a
huge hit on their hands, one which their medium-sized operation would not
allow them to handle.  So they made an unusual move and went shopping for a
major label which would release Nevermind.

Geffen Records was the record label wise enough to agree with Sub Pop, and a
deal was struck.  Sub Pop and Nirvana became household icons almost
immediately after the record's release.  Nevermind was a powerful, hook-laden
masterpiece, injected with a jagged yet melodic dose of raw angst.  Kurt
Cobain became the voice of a new generation searching for their own identity.
Nirvana became a mirror into the souls of many disaffected youths, not only
of this generation, but of generations past as well.

Nevermind spoke volumes about my own thoughts and the powerful music elevated
those thoughts to a new level.  Life goes on, and with the tragic death of
Kurt Cobain, Nirvana passed on as well.  I chose not to look back, and it was
only with this new release of Nevermind that I was reminded about the painful
yet exhilarating past, barely tangible in my fading memory.  The experience
of seeing Nevermind available as a Mobile Fidelity Original Master Recording
on vinyl could only be described as electric.  I couldn't wait to slap it on
the turntable and crank up the volume.

Before I listened to the new record, I dusted off a section of my record
collection and pulled out the first copy of this gem I purchased: a German
vinyl pressing.  I had been impressed with the sound of this record and
thought it would be interesting to compare the two.

I threw the German copy on the turntable and proceeded to crank up "Smells
Like Teen Spirit" until the windows began to shake.  Yes, even after being
flogged to death by MTV, the song still stood up and smacked me in the face.
I then put on the Mobile Fidelity copy and played the same song.  Not only
did it stand up and smack me in the face, it pushed me out the window!

Almost immediately the experience of sonic enrichment and the profound dynamic
depth of this new recording was apparent.  As I proceeded to switch back and
forth between the two records, the subtle differences began to permeate my
senses (yes, all five of them).  No longer subtle, the experience of the
Mobile Fidelity recording was pummeling my senses with Nirvana's angst-ridden
sonic beauty.

The power of "Territorial Pissings" drilled into my very psyche.  The subtle
acoustic aspects of "Drain You" really shone through.  The beautiful pop
sensibilities of "On A Plain" made themselves known in no uncertain terms.
Overall, the Mobile Fidelity recording offered cleaner highs, fuller and less
muddied lows, raised the haunting residual feedback to a new plane, offered
greater dynamic depth throughout, and succeeded in limiting distortion--
especially at high volume.  Also, the record offers cleaner stereo separation,
especially noticeable on "Breed." The record did, however, have more surface
noise than on past Mobile Fidelity releases, but there was certainly much
less surface noise than on the German pressing.

The packaging job done on the record is top-notch.  While the original LP was
not a gatefold design, the Mobile Fidelity release is, and they've taken
advantage of the extra space by publishing photos from some of the singles
released off of Nevermind.  One curious aspect of the record is that they
print the blurb "lyrics reprinted by permission," yet there are no printed
lyrics!

Mobile Fidelity obviously realizes that quality music knows no boundaries.
I cannot say enough good things about this recording.  The music speaks for
itself.  If you have been avoiding Nevermind for any reason, now is the time
to find out what you've been missing, and if you REALLY want to experience
the music in all its sonic glory, buy Mobile Fidelity's Original Master
Recording, also available on 24 karat gold Ultradisc CD format.



THE PUSHSTARS - Meet Me At The Fair (Imago)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

I just reviewed Bluebeard a few minutes ago.  Very very heavy stuff.  I like
heavy stuff.  Then I put this one on.  Not heavy.  Not even sorta.  In fact,
it seems to be acoustic guitar, bass, and drums.  Lightweight?  Okay, but in
the same way that Paul Simon and Rickie Lee Jones are lightweight.  What I
love about The Pushstars is the stories they tell.  Chris Trapper (guitar and
vocals) is an excellent writer, and I suspect a lot of his songs would be
huge hits if they were recorded with some electric guitars going through amps
turned up to 7 or so.  His delivery is incredibly honest and personal, and
his lyrics are very visual.  "Lack Of Motion" deserves to be a hit.  The
hooks are solid, both melodic and lyrical.

"Well they'll never see you fall in a lack of motion.  Won't see anything at
all in a lack of motion."

It's a story of anxiety and fear of stagnation--of the desire to seize the
day.

"So my father said Son, you'd better live your dream.  I don't think he did
so himself, it seems, unless his dream was bringing up a brat like me..."

I like the way this guy writes.  Trapper is probably not going to become a
big star.  He's too good and way too honest.  Plus, MTV would be in a quandry
over whether or not to bleep whole passages like "So I pictured you all silky
and blue, all soft and strong and sensual and crazy, grabbed the lotion at my
side and took it for a ride it won't forget..." Perhaps if they'd just add a
reference to a drive-by shooting, MTV would play the hell out of it.  No such
luck, though.  I'm not sure where The Pushstars are from, but the songs feel
like small town tales, filled with introspection and longing.  I hope they
never move to LA.  I know it's selfish, but I'd hate to see them lose that
honesty.  



LOU REED -- Set the Twilight Reeling (Warner Brothers)
by Steve Marshall

The man once called "the poet laureate of New York City" has a new album out.
Set the Twilight Reeling is the newest release from Lou Reed, his first in
four years. Lou spans a wide range of "listenability" in his vast musical
career. He can be brilliant, and he can be just plain awful. On his new
album, he's very close to the brilliant end of the scale. A lot of this
probably has to do with the fact Lou's happy. Elated. His new relationship
with Laurie Anderson is the reason. "The Adventurer" is written about her
specifically.

The CD is much more guitar based than his previous album, "Magic & Loss."
Reed said in a recent interview that he used every guitar he owns on the new
CD. The liner notes say "Due to increased dynamic range, raise volume above
average. PLAY IT LOUD." Excellent advice, the album sounds great. It was
recorded digitally, direct to disc in Reed's NY studio, The Roof. From the
opening feedback into "Egg Cream," to the rocking finale of the title track,
this is an excellent album. It's full of superb guitar work (Lou plays all
the guitars on the CD), and intelligent lyrics of life and love as only Reed
can write them.

There are a lot of really great songs on here. "NYC Man" has a really cool
bass line running through it, courtesy of Fernando Saunders. "Riptide" is an
eight minute guitar assault. Lyrically, the song conjures up images of
dreams, dementia, and moonlit oceans. The brutally honest "Trade In" is
another highlight. You can always count on Lou Reed to have something to say.
He's never at a loss for words. The biting commentary for the right-wing
conservatives, "Sex With Your Parents (Motherfucker)," is a perfect example.
Reed captures several different moods with his guitar work on the CD,
sometimes within the same song. The title track starts out as an acoustic
tune, then rocks out at the end.

Those of us who were lucky enough to catch Lou Reed on his brief tour for the
album know the musical excitement he's capable of these days. Reed has
produced a fine new CD, his best in years.



777 / SYSTEM 7 -  Fire + Water, 1995,
Big Life / Butterfly / Astralwerks / Caroline
Reviewed by Keith Gillard

Another example of having to review one album that's really two.  Or, rather,
this time it's two albums that are really one.  Am I confusing you?  Fire +
Water is a two-CD set, consisting of disc one, Fire, and disc two, Water.
Both discs have nearly identical track listings, Fire having two unique
tracks, and Water having one track all its own.  However, the two discs are
far from being identical.

While the style on both discs could be called trance techno, the approaches
are very different.  Fire is much more aggressive and dancey, with Water
being more ambient.  However, elements of both spill over from one into the
other.

System 7 (or 777, as they are called on this release) are another in the
increasing number of intelligent trance techno duos, made up of Steve Hillage
and Miquette Giraudy.  What makes this different from all the other
Orbital-wannabees that have come along is that Steve Hillage is not just
another synth / sampler / sequencer jockey;  he is a very well respected
fusion guitarist.  I can honestly say that this is some of the most
innovative guitar work I've heard in some time, but it has more to do with
its role within the music than the actual parts.  At some points, it is
difficult to tell which parts are sequenced and which sounds are actually
being generated by a guitar (and I mean that as high praise).  Absolutely
wonderful, tasteful playing.

Not to distract from the incredible synth arrangements and sound design here
(which is exactly what the guitars don't do!) these sounds are gorgeously
programmed and layered into wonderful whirling masses of evolving energy. I
listened to both discs back-to-back (and they're each over 70 minutes) and
then went immediately back to disc one.  This is fine stuff, and will
probably stay in my "current play" CD stack as long as Orbital, FSOL, or 808
State have.

Percussion is uniformly excellent throughout the two discs.  I particularly
enjoyed the layered hi-hat work.  Most of the percussion is electronic, with
very few loops in sight.  Several sounds (as well as atmospheres) were sampled
on-location in Bali, which gives tracks such as "Batukau" or "Dr. Livingstone
I Presume" an exotic edge.

Highlights for me are "Coltrane (fire mix)", with its relentless kick (this
one drills right through your scull), exotic bullfrog textures, and flanging
metallic lead tone.  "Gliding on Duo-Tone Curves", with its hard edged driving
syncopations, can't help but make you dance.  The gorgeous layered strings
and guitars of "Sirenes (tranquillity mix)" are almost enough to make me cry.

I have a few criticisms, however:  "Mysterious Traveller" comes close to
losing my attention, but the marvellous muted guitar arpeggios raise their
heads just often enough to keep me there.  "Radiate" reminds me just a little
too much of Orbital's "Lush 3" (although, here again, it is the guitars which
keep me listening).  "Overview"  I could have done without altogether,
although it is not altogether unpleasant.

These are minor complaints, though.  I suppose if I had one big criticism, it
would be in the songwriting department.  Here we have a band who are doing
incredibly innovative things in terms of production and arrangement, with
fantastic programming and playing to back them up.  So why are they letting
the genre constrain them so much in their songwriting?  Minimalism has its
place, in production as well as songwriting, but I sense that 777 could go
somewhere completely new and unexplored if they applied the same level of
innovation to their songwriting as they have to their production.  Some songs,
such as "Jupiter!", hover on the border, but don't quite allow themselves to
explore the songs that seem to be trying to get out.  This is one area where
a band such as 808 State have a real edge.

That having been said, all that makes me think is that this band has some
room to grow.  I have heard that they have just released another album:  I
will be rushing out to buy it!  If it progresses from this one, well, I have
no idea of what to expect - and that's just the way I like it.

777's "Fire + Water" is one of the best trance albums I've heard.
Innovative, brilliant, tasteful.  Two discs, two moods, and some of the best
production I've heard in quite some time.

	Songwriting:	6/10
	Production:	9/10
	Performance:	9/10
	Overall:	8/10



Sonic Youth - Goo (Original Master Recording LP) (Mobile Fidelity Sound Labs)
Reviewed by Cai Campbell

CD's have all but replaced vinyl LP's.  Anybody can tell you that.  But vinyl
still has a very strong following, both in the collecting and audiophile
communities.  You don't see too many new releases available on vinyl these
days, but you can be guaranteed that the newest offering from Sonic Youth
will always be available on vinyl.

Sonic Youth is among a small group of bands who insist that their recordings
be made available on vinyl.  Perhaps they understand, better than anyone
else, that the very nature of their music demands - nay, SCREAMS - that it
be heard with all the depth and sonic clarity which only an analog recording
can reproduce faithfully.  Mobile Fidelity steps in to carry the process of
delivering a Sonic Youth recording in all its reverb-drenched glory to the
extreme: by making Goo available as an Original Master Recording LP.

Goo is interesting in that it was the band's first release on a major label.
After the brilliant Daydream Nation, recorded in 1988 for Blast First, many
critics bemoaned the move to Geffen as a sell-out; that their music would
somehow lose its raw edge under the dictates of corporate control.  Sonic
Youth proved their critics wrong and delighted their fans by releasing Goo
in 1990.  Goo is a stunning collection of classic Sonic Youth over-the-top
anthems.  Not only had they not lost their edge, they had refined it to such
a degree that it now cut both ways, leaving the listener trembling in its
wake.

I must plead guilty to the fact that I did not purchase Goo on vinyl when it
first came out, so I have only the CD to compare the Original Master
Recording LP to.  Not a fair match by any estimation, but as it turned out,
it was extremely entertaining and enlightening.

I queued up both the CD and the LP so that they played in synch.  I then
switched back and forth between them to get a real time feel for their
differences.  Right off the bat, it was very obvious that the Mobile Fidelity
LP was much richer and sonically warmer than the CD.  It seems almost a
cliche to say that the CD was cold and antiseptic by comparison, but those
words ring truer than any others I could have chosen.  Sonic Youth's barrage
of feedback and controlled distortion was crippled under the digital format,
whereas the analog representation placed me in the center of the maelstrom,
inundating me with sonic bliss.  This breakdown on the CD's part became even
more obvious at high volume.  It seemed as if the middle portion of the sound
spectrum was ripped out and thrown away from the CD, although it did manage
to maintain a brilliant high end.

It was not long before I gave up even referring back to the CD for comparison,
as the Mobile Fidelity LP sucked me into the experience in a manner which
only a truly astounding recording can do.  Surface noise on the LP was
virtually absent, and the sound spectrum maintained its strength throughout,
from the highest highs to the lowest lows.

As with all the Original Master Recording releases, Mobile Fidelity did an
exceptional job with the package.  Although the "fold-out poster" concept of
the CD booklet gets lost, the gatefold LP cover opens to reveal a rich
assortment of colorful pictures of the band.

No other listening experience has shown me how much more vinyl has to offer.
Vinyl is far from being dead, and thanks to Mobile Fidelity, it looks like we
can continue to experience the luxury of a fine listening experience for many
years to come.



STING -- Mercury Falling (A&M)
by Steve Marshall

One of the most anticipated releases this year is the new CD from Sting--
Mercury Falling. Unfortunately, it's also one of the most disappointing.
The songs are dull and boring. Sting should have called this one "Falling
Asleep," or maybe "My Ability to Write Good Songs is Falling," etc. He
covers a wide spectrum of musical genres on the disc, from country to gospel
to rhythm & blues to jazz. The problem is that the songs have nothing to
hold the listener's interest. Unless, of course, you like songs with no
melody, or you need a quick cure for insomnia.

Mercury Falling starts off with the first song written for the album (and
the disc's only good track), "The Hounds of Winter." From there, it goes
downhill fast. "I Hung My Head" sounds like Reverend Sting is just waiting
for the gospel choir to arrive. By the next song, they arrive in full force
to perform on the first single, "Let Your Soul Be Your Pilot." One of the
other tracks getting airplay is "All Four Seasons." This song features just
about every cliched lyric ever written. By the time you get to tracks like
"La Belle Dame Sans Regrets" (which bears a strong resemblance to "Sister
Moon") or "Valparaiso," you're fighting to stay awake.

The problem Sting seems to be having lately is a lack of cohesive melody in
his compositions. This started as far back as his second solo effort,
...Nothing But the Sun. He also seems firmly planted in the middle of the
road musically, as well. According to the bio sheet, Sting asks himself
three questions before starting any project. One of which is "Will anyone
find what I have to say remotely useful or interesting?" At this point in
his career, it looks like the answer is no.



PETE TOWNSHEND --
Coolwalkingsmoothtalkingstraightsmokingfirestoking: The Best of Pete
Townshend (Atlantic)
by Steve Marshall

Atlantic has just released a new Pete Townshend compilation called (from
this point on) "Coolwalking."  As the principal songwriter for The Who,
and also as a solo artist, Townshend has written more than his share of
great music. Though the band hasn't produced any new material (besides the
track recorded for the Two Rooms tribute CD) in over a decade, Townshend
continues to write vital and compelling music on his own. Coolwalking covers
Pete's entire solo career from his 1972 album, Who Came First, through 1993's
excellent (and highly underrated) Psychoderelict.

Rather than running in chronological order, Coolwalking starts off with
what is probably Pete's most popular solo tune, "Rough Boys." As far as
songs to start off a CD, you can't do much better than this. The original
version of "Let My Love Open the Door" follows, with the Ronnie Lane
collaboration, "Misunderstood" (the song featuring the CD's title in the
lyrics), right behind. From there, you go into one of the best tracks from
the White City album, "Give Blood." With its horn arrangement and David
Gilmour's guitar work, this song was a highlight on the live Deep End shows
from the mid-80's.

Also included on Coolwalking are two tracks from 1982's introspective All
the Best Cowboys Have Chinese Eyes album - "The Sea Refuses No River," and
a new version of "Slit Skirts," with a different ending. The CD also
features a Psychoderelict outtake called "Uneasy Street" (which sounds a
lot like "Don't Try to Make Me Real"), plus a great new version of "Let My
Love Open the Door." The new arrangement has an atmospheric, almost ambient
feel to it. It's an interesting change to what was originally just a pop song.

While it's great having album tracks like "Sheraton Gibson" and Townshend's
solo version of "Pure and Easy" included on the CD, any Pete fan is sure to
find some glaring omissions. Where are tracks like "Second Hand Love," or
Pete's killer version of "After the Fire" (a song originally given to Roger
Daltrey for his Under a Raging Moon album), or any of the other live Deep
End tracks? Instead we get "Face the Face" and "Street in the City." If
they wanted to include more from the Rough Mix album, why not use "My Baby
Gives it Away" or "Heart to Hang On To?" Both of these are better songs than
"Street in the City." The MTV hit, "Face Dances - Part Two" is missing too.
Not to mention the exquisite "Now and Then," or any of the other great tracks
from Psychoderelict.

It's true, there's a lot of material that didn't make it to the CD. However,
considering the fact that this is only one CD and not two, Coolwalking is an
excellent representation of Townshend's solo work.



THE UPSETTERS: Upsetters A Go Go (Heartbeat)
Reviewed By DJ Johnson

The Upsetters were to reggae what Booker T. and the MG's were to soul.
They provided the music for many great front men, including Lee "Scratch"
Perry and Bob Marley.  Carlton Barrett (drums), Aston Barrett (bass),
Glen Adams (keyboards) and Alva "Reggie" Lewis (guitar) are as important
to reggae history as Marley or Sonia Pottinger.  This CD is a must-have for
people who care to trace that history, because none of the 16 tracks have
been released previously, having spent the past 30-some years in Adams'
private vault.

The performances are tight and cool, as you would expect.  The brothers
Barrett, who later anchored Bob Marley and the Wailers, layed down some
of reggae's coolest grooves.  Check out the flow of "What About Africa."
It's a crime that this recording wasn't heard when it was new.  Some of
these tracks are either alternate takes or updates of songs that DID see
the light of day.  Probably the most interesting is "Soul Constitution,"
which seems much closer to psychedelia or self-contained Dub than the
original.  But then The Upsetters always did make trippy music, often from
simple melodies.  "X-Ray Vision" shuffles right along with Adams' five-note
distorted melody.  Hell, it's ONE note for a good portion of the song!

Complaints?  Yeah, but it's just nitpicking.  On "Cypriano," it sounds like
it might have been mastered from warped vinyl.  Either that, or Adams was
doing some very strange stuff with the Hammond.  It's annoying, but even
if you ignore that track, you've got 15 others to work with, and not a slouch
in the bunch.  Can't wait to hear the next one.  C'mon, do you really think
Glen Adams only had 16 lost tracks in his vault?!



VARIOUS ARTISTS - Estrus Cocktail Companion (Estrus)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Ultra-cool collection of instro-surf and garage punk tunes by some of the
best of both worlds.  On the surf side, there are killer tracks by The
Apemen, Man Or Astro-Man, Satan's Pilgrims, The Del Lagunas, Girl Trouble,
and Jackie and the Cedrics.  "Vampiro," by Satan's Pilgrims, is one of the
coolest spy tracks of the year, a murky and smoldering Peter Gunn.

All of the surf tracks are A1, but the garage contingent would not be outdone.
The Makers' "The Jerome Tree" and The Mortals' "Atomic Cocktail" are both
ass-kickers that belong on any decent garage party tape.  "Trouble Man," by
Jack O' Fire, is like the guy in the tux at the toga party--you can't help
but stare.  What is this smooth blues song doing here?  I love the track,
but . . .it sounds kinda silly sandwiched between Jackie and the Cedrics and
The Makers.  Ah well, variety is the spice of life.

Southern Culture On The Skids even has a track on this baby.  "Moonshine
Martini" is a smokin' little garage-a-billy number, and it's not alone,
because The Cowslingers' excellent "Strip Bars, Liquor & Fireworks" is
sitting in the 2nd slot waiting to jump ya.  This is a short CD, considering
the fact that there are 12 bands.  29:06.  That's alright, though.  It feels
fairly complete.  I think it was a pretty hip move to close it out with a
lo-fi bomber, "Let's Take Another Booze" by Teengenerate.  It's like a tip
of the hat to the spirit of balls-out rock and roll that begat all the other
music on the Estrus Cocktail Companion.  I only have one question--why the
hell isn't there a Mono Men track on here?  It's Dave Crider's label, right?



VARIOUS ARTISTS - Spawn Of Skarmageddon (Moon Ska)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

There are 43 tracks by 43 ska bands on these two CDs, and the best part is the
fact that it doesn't ever start to feel redundant.  That's because so many
styles of ska are presented.  Traditional ska, with roots in American soul,
is represented by bands like Stubborn All Stars, The Insteps, and Engine 54.
Among the best of the trad tracks is The Blue Beats' "Don't Get Crazy," a
tune done in the tradition of Laurel Aitken. (Try though they may, however,
they can't quite match his soulful voice.)  The Dynamics' "How Do You Do?"
is distinguished by harmony vocals that remind me of the old High Note bands.

The modern school of R&B and big band influenced ska is very well represented
by bands like Buck-O-Nine, Crawdaddy, The Mixers and The Suspects.  Mock
Turtle Soup's bass player makes "Skankin' On My Lungs" the hottest track of
all.  I was also knocked out by the steel drum and trumpet solos in Mobtown's
"Cup o' Joe," as well as the groove.  The Hi Hats' cover of "Summertime" is
a lot of fun, too.  (Though I'm still declaring The Zombies' recording of
that song as the best.)

Then there's the punk-influenced ska of NY Citizens, Slapstick, SMA, The
Instigators, Ska Humbug, Less Than Jake, and a handful of others.  The punk
level is heavy in some, hinted at in others, but it's never over the top,
which is almost too bad.  I think I'd like to hear Iggy Pop screaming "Spider
In My Bed," but it ain't gonna happen soon.  Meanwhile, these are great
tracks and this is a great introduction for someone who wants to get a broad
overview of what's going on in the ska genre.  And at 16 bucks for two CDs,
it's fairly painless as well.



VARIOUS ARTISTS -- Supper's Ready... Another Serving From The Musical Box
(Magna Carta)
Reviewed by Steve Marshall

When Genesis first got together back in the late 60's, the band couldn't
have had any idea of the success they were to achieve. With Peter Gabriel,
and later Phil Collins, on lead vocals, the band became one of the top
drawing concert acts of the rock era. Gabriel left the band in 1975 to
pursue a solo career, and, to many, took the creative spark with him. Once
Collins and company started writing more hit-oriented material, the band
started shying away from the longer tracks it had become known for. The
songs got shorter and more radio-friendly. Whether you prefer the newer
(more commercial) stuff, or the older (and better) material, the fact
remains - Genesis is (or was, depending on your preference) one of the most
influential progressive rock bands around.

Ranging from early cuts like Richard Sinclair's cover of "For Absent
Friends" to Magellan's version of "Mama", the artists on this tribute CD
perform a wide assortment of the Genesis's material with mixed results.
There're a few that are really great (such as Over the Garden Wall's take
on the classic "Firth of Fifth"), and a few that are "interesting" (like
Kevin Gilbert's "Back in N.Y.C." and Annie Haslam's version of "Ripples")
but for the most part, Supper's Ready is a disappointment. Michael Zentner's
vocals on "Carpet Crawlers" sound like a cross between Barry Gibb and Roy
Orbison. Not exactly what you want to hear in a prog-rock song. Shadow
Gallery does a good job on "Entangled," as does Cairo with "Squonk".

Most of the songs on the CD are fairly true to the originals, with the
exception of Crack the Sky's almost industrial version of "I Know What I
Like." The biggest problem with most of the tracks here is the vocals. It
makes you realize just how unique the voices of Peter Gabriel and Phil
Collins really are. The music is good on most of the songs, but the vocals
just don't cut it. Several of the bands here are on the Yes tribute disc,
Tales From Yesterday (where they sound much better). Supper's Ready might be
a good disc if you don't already know the material. If you are familiar with
the songs, though, you'll probably be disappointed.



VARIOUS ARTISTS - Hands On Yello (Urban/Motor Music GmbH/Polygram)
Reviewed by Keith Gillard

Continuing in the tradition of "YMO: Hi-Tech No Crime" and "Art of Noise:
The FON Mixes" is "Hands on Yello": Some of today's highest-profile techno
artists paying homage to the origins of their species.  Yello is certainly
one of these few bands who really deserve to be honoured as true innovators.

One reason I compare Hands on Yello to the YMO and AoN compilations is that
here, as in those tributes, the remixers still remained true to the spirit of
the songs, generally speaking.  I appreciate this.  This package still
sounds like Yello, overall, though there are a couple of items I would take
issue with.  The vocals are still present, and those famous Yello sounds are
still used.  This may be due to the fact that Boris Blank was personally
involved in this project.  However, many of these mixes are closer to the
originals than some of the mixes done by Boris himself!

Most of the material is early Yello, with One Second being the latest album
represented.  That is when Yello was at their most inventive, and when most
of these remixers, as DJs or clubgoers, became familiar with our Swiss heroes.
Generally, great selection of works (Baby is still my favourite Yello album,
though) and well handled.  I have a few highs and lows to point out, though:
I love Cosmic Baby's "Dr Van Steiner," which includes some of Deiter's vocal
which was left off the original.  I was very happy to see "Live at the Roxy"
represented here, but I could have done without Ilsa Gold's introduction.
Hardsequencer's "I Love You" keeps all the original sounds, and still takes
the piece somewhere new.  "La Habanera" is still the glorious "La Habanera,"
although Carl Craig does belabour the chorus horn riff a bit much.  The Orb's
remix of "Excess" bears about as much resemblance to the original track as
their remix of YMO's "Tong Poo" did... a wonderful trancy experience
nonetheless.

The last track on the disc is my all-time favourite Yello track:  "Lost
Again," remixed by Moby.  Oddly enough, he is the only one of the artists
involved in this to claim that Yello has had no particular influence on his
work.  His work on "Lost Again" is surprising and excellent.  He presents it
as a ballad, with the emphasis on the song and the lyric.  What a wonderful
way to end this disc!

Some of the mixes really fall down, though.  None more so than Plutone's "Oh
Yeah" - how can you mess up a remix when you have source material as
incredible and simple as everybody's favourite '80's soundtrack song?
Plutone butchered one of my favourites here.  Jam & Spoon's "You Gotta Say
Yes to Another Excess - Great Mission" is mindless jungle - ho hum!  I'm not
sure of whether or not I approve of Carl Cox turning "L'Hotel" from a
cinematic soundscape into a hard trance number.

Overall, this is a mixed bag - some truly excellent work, and some incredibly
disappointing. But with such songs and sounds to work with, even a mediocre
remix can still sound wonderful.  The only real crime here is Plutone's "Oh
Yeah," which probably dropped my rating of this disc by a whole point.  But
that's what programmable CD players are for!

	Songwriting:	8/10
	Production:	6/10
	Performance:	7/10
	Overall:	7/10



VARIOUS ARTISTS -- Tales From Yesterday... A View From the South Side
of the Sky (Magna Carta)
Reviewed by Steve Marshall

For nearly 30 years now (and almost as many members), Yes has been a leader in
the realm of progressive music - both as a group, and in side projects
outside the band. In this age of tribute albums, it seemed inevitable that
someone would put something together to pay homage to the band. Magna Carta
Records has done just that on the recent release Tales From Yesterday. Peter
Morticelli and Mike Varney did an excellent job producing the CD, which
features covers of 13 classic tracks. Roger Dean, cover artist for several
Yes albums and a host of other progressive rock artists, did the artwork on
the booklet.

The best thing about Tales is that it includes performances by some of the
band members themselves. Steve Howe contributes the guitar credenza on
"Roundabout" and performs "Turn of the Century" with former Renaissance
vocalist Annie Haslam. Patrick Moraz's solo performance of "Soon" was a
highlight on his recent solo tour, and is included here on the CD as well.
Original Yes guitarist, Peter Banks, gives an instrumental version of "Astral
Traveler." Adam Wakeman, (Rick's son), shows off his keyboard prowess on
Jeronimo Road's version of "Starship Trooper." The song is a bit heavy handed
at times, but you can definitely tell Adam had a good teacher.

The majority of the other songs on Tales are excellent. There're a few
renditions that don't work, such as Magellan's take on "Don't Kill the Whale."
Aside from that, this is a great disc. Steve Morse turns in faithful
renditions of "Mood For a Day" and "Clap" (commonly mislabeled as 'The'
Clap). Stanley Snail dishes up an amazing version of "Siberian Khatru." I
heard this version of the song on the radio and swore it was Yes, until the
piano solo came in.  It's that good. Cairo does an excellent job on the epic
"South Side of the Sky" as well. If you're even remotely a Yes fan, you'll
love this CD.



STEVIE RAY VAUGHAN AND DOUBLE TROUBLE -- Greatest Hits (Epic)
Reviewed by Steve Marshall

When Stevie Ray Vaughan died in a tragic helicopter accident in 1990, the
blues world lost a great guitarist. Riding high on the success of his
latest album, "In Step," SRV was thought by many to be in his prime. After
winning a tough battle with drug & alcohol abuse, he was clearly at his
peak. Whether this CD is looked upon as just a contract album doesn't matter.
The fact remains that Stevie Ray Vaughan recorded some incredible music
over his brief, but highly influential career.

The material covered here includes tracks from his entire studio catalog.
All the hits are here - "Pride and Joy," "Crossfire," "Cold Shot," "Texas
Flood," his instrumental rendition of "Little Wing," plus a previously
unreleased cover of  The Beatles' "Taxman" (recorded during SRV's first
sober session in Austin, TX). As with any greatest hits CD, there are
always songs that should be included that don't make the final selection.
This one is no exception. Epic could have easily made this more than a
single CD. It's widely known to his fans that there is a ton of material
sitting in the CBS vaults. Boxed set, anyone?



WAR - Life (Is So Strange) (Rhino)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

Another War re-release from Rhino, this one being the last of their
"pre-comeback" albums.  By the time this was released in 1983, a few
things had changed.  Most notably, Lonnie Jordan had become a polished
keyboard player.  It's possible he always was, but on earlier War releases,
he had always played from more of a gut level.  Emotion over technique.
The good news is that his precision didn't dilute the chemistry.  War
was still War.

The CD consists of six tracks, two of which are medleys. "WW III (Medley)" is
tense and dramatic, but it doesn't release that tension in the classic War
tradition.  It builds for nearly eight minutes, then fades.  On the other
hand, "U-2 (Medley)," which closes the CD, kicks into a solid groove right
off the bat and has a great rhythmic instrumental second half.  Lee Oskar,
War's Dutch harmonica wizard, contributes "Summer Dreams," a song typical
of his contributions to their repertoire.  As always, the harmonica is
stunning and forlorn.  Oskar is one of the more often overlooked heroes of
the harp.  (Check out his long solo in "Gypsy Man" on Deliver The Word for
proof.)

The track that transforms this album from good to great is "Happiness,"
seven and a half minutes of reggae heaven with more than a hint of street.
It's just another example of War's uncanny ability to weave complex musical
parts so cleverly that the final result sounds simple and uncluttered.  Not
an easy trick.  War made better albums than Life (Is So Strange), but it's
still well worth the price.  The fact is that "Happiness" should be held in
the same regard as "Low Rider," "Gypsy Man," "Me And Baby Brother," and
"Cisco Kid," but I haven't seen it on any greatest hits packages yet.  For
that reason, this one is indispensible.



WAR - Youngblood: Original Motion Picture Soundtrack (Rhino)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

In the bad old 70s, War had a long string of hit songs which still sound hot
and fresh today, offering proof of my own theory that a great groove is
timeless.  War was all about great grooves.  Remember "Me And Baby Brother?"
Or "Low Rider?"  Try to hold still while those songs are playing.  You can't.
Youngblood is a soundtrack to a 1978 film that I never saw.  I've actually
looked for it, but it doesn't seem to exist anymore.  Judging by the year,
and by the subject matter of the songs, I'd say that it was a flick about
a drug dealer and street gangs in the ghetto.  Makes perfect sense, because
War was "street" before we knew what to call it.  Happily, Rhino Records
rescued this band from the "out of print" list some time back.  Good ol'
Rhino.  It's no surprise, knowing how hip Rhino is, that they even dug this
gem out of the vault.

Like most War albums, this one is filled with moody grooves, fantastic
percussion (provided by the late great Papa Dee Allen), and their vocal
harmony sound which, on its own, should put them in any music Hall Of Fame.
Their harmonies didn't sound precise so much as they sounded primal, but a
close listen in the headphones reveals as much precision as on any Crosby,
Stills and Nash performance.  The fact that they did that without distracting
from the overall sound is amazing enough.

Youngblood begins with the 10:42 title track, "Youngblood (Livin' In The
Streets)."  Like their 11 minute classic, "Gypsy Man," the groove is dark and
mysterious, and the song doesn't feel long at all.  "Sing A Happy Song" is a
very 70s uptempo soul tune that contrasts sharply with the darkness of the
opening track.  Much of this music is probably intended to be background
soundtrack, but it's War, you know--it all sounds fantastic.  "Junk Yard" is
one of those tracks, complete with street dialog over the funky percussion
and bass.  "Superdude" is another, but on this one War shows their skills as
trad jazz musicians.  "Flying Machine (The Chase)" is a seven and a half
minute jam with lots of free form solos by Charles Miller (flute) and Lonnie
Jordan (piano).  The one that had the most commercial potential was "This
Funky Music Makes You Feel Good," but it seems this album was totally
overlooked.  By 1978, War was being shuffled out to pasture.  Too bad, because
this album should have been heard.  



JAC ZINDER - Chairs I Have Known (Catasonic)
Reviewed by DJ Johnson

ALERT: Attention, those of you who are always on the lookout for something
out of the ordinary.  This is it.  This is a sound, a body of work and a
moving story all wrapped into one release.  This is the story of a unique
individual, Jac Zinder, who was tragically killed when the car in which he
was riding was hit by a speeding drunk driver on Sunset Blvd.  Jac was known
by many people for many different things, but he was probably best known as
"The Fuzzyland Impressario."  Fuzzyland was Jac's club, and there he held
court.  He wrote record reviews for several publications, including Spin
and The LA Weekly.  All of this is explained in the outstanding booklet that
comes with "Chairs I Have Known."  His story would be worth the price alone,
but the CD is a rare gem that makes this package priceless.

Jac was ahead of his time--or way behind it, depending on how you look at it.
Long before Exotica became a hot genre again, Jac was playing it and writing
it.  Most of these songs were recorded in various garages over the span of a
decade.  Jac had this cheesy old Lowrey home organ--the kind with the ultra
dorky sounding drum machine built in--and he wasn't afraid to use it.  In
fact, it was the only sound that would work with most of this material. On
later recordings, he worked up (down?) to cheesier Casios and the like.  The 
instrumentals presented here are the perfect soundtrack to your most surreal
dreams.  If Art Clokey had been an acid-head, this music would have graced
every Gumby clay-toon.  Listen to "Hawaiian Block Party" and you'll see what
I mean.

While most of the songs are of the Exotica persuasion, there are a few tracks
here and there that are pure punk, such as "Everybody Dance With Me" and
"Pussy Boy (Motherfucker)."  The latter was supposed to be an instrumental,
but during this live recording at Fuzzyland, Jac became annoyed at the lack
of interest from the crowd (and at technical snafus that had plagued the
band all evening) and he began verbally beating the shit out of everyone
present.  He went way over the top so recklessly that the crowd couldn't
help but love it.  It's like primal scream therapy with obscenities and
insults thrown in.  Most therapeutic.

One of the most unusual stories revolves around the song "Cool."  As legend
has it, Jac found the lyric on a bus, took it home and put it to exotic music
that is at least as odd.  Taken alone, this song would probably freak you out.
You'd be wondering what the hell was happening in the music industry.  Taken
in the context of this entire collection, it's a mind trip that makes perfect
sense.

Jac's last band, Bufadora, delved into even more areas of Exotica, reaching
psychedelic conclusions in songs like "Children's Wire" and "Birdhouse."  I
wonder what Jac would have done next.  Thanks to some drunken moron, we'll
never find out.  Luckily, Jac had a few friends.  Over 300 of them attended
his funeral.  Then they all got together and did a benefit to raise the money
needed to release his music on this CD.  It's an amazing and moving story
that comes with its own soundtrack.  Not everything on "Chairs I Have Known"
is perfect--these are garage tapes, after all--but there is a consistantly
dreamy atmosphere that is quite exquisite.  Jac was a very creative guy.

The booklet includes a clipping from one of Jac's record reviews for the LA
Weekly.  This little tidbit ended up on the cutting room floor, so to speak.
His editor felt he had gone too far over the top in describing his reaction
to The Mevlevi Ensemble's record.  Here is the cut passage:

  "I became acutely aware of my blood pumping through my body, of the Earth
   rotating on its axis, of atoms whizzing around other atoms..."

I think "Chairs I Have Known" will have that effect on some people.  Some will
not be able to get past the "cheap-n-cheesy" keyboard sound.  I'm blown away.
Until this week, I had only heard his name and not his music.  I didn't know
it until this CD came out, but I miss him.

(Catasonic Records - PO Box 2727, 1615 Wilcox Ave, Hollywood, CA 90078. Voice
phone 213-664-1404.  E-mail catasonic@interramp.com.  Website at
http://underground.net/Weba/catasonic.html)

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                   B E T W E E N   Z E R O   &   O N E

By Steven Leith

LET THE GAMES BEGIN

Are our leaders half-empty or half-full of bullshit?  I'm fairly optimistic
so I think they are half-full.  Half-empty or half-full, it still gives them
plenty of room to shovel it on during the next campaign cycle.  But lest we
blame the Politicos for the tidal wave of sound bites remember the New York
Times' motto: "All the News that's Fit to Print."

The media shapes the debate and the politicians just go along for the ride.
If you don't like our current crop of politicians don't look at your party
machinery, look at corporate media.  Where once the party machine selected
who would run for office, now millionaire media pundits decide who should
run and who should stay home.

The airwaves are awash in fake debate.  The Print media is drowning in an
inky sea of self interest.  This must mean the system is broken, right?
Wrong. 

The system is running like a well oiled machine.  The lubricant?  Money. The
system is not about democracy; it is about the distribution of your wealth.
Yeah, wealth is distributed; but not the way the media says.

Your life is not being made harder because of welfare moms.  Your pay check
is shrinking and your remaining income is flowing from your pockets into the
vaults of the corporations.

The system is working.  Concentration of wealth means concentration of power,
and if you don't think the media is part of the problem you just are not
paying attention.

The media encourages us to partake in politics as if it was a basketball
tournament.  The politicians move hot-air-filled ideas back and forth within
an artificial boundary.  Leaders dare not stray from the media created court
of public opinion or they will be hounded into oblivion.

Everyone is so busy shouting that the media has a liberal or conservative
bias that they fail to see that it has only one bias--the bias of wealth.
Wealth welcomes government liberalism when it comes to corporate welfare and
fiscal conservatism when it comes to avoiding taxes.

As long as the factory worker and the truck driver struggle with each other
for some illusionary ideology, the vested interests of corporate culture will
have an even easier job of sucking dry the body politic. Like quarrelsome
dogs, we are allowed our little tug of war over the table scraps.  We are
suffered to remain in the great hall because we may be needed to stop up the
fortress walls with our bodies.

A little harsh?  Consider this.  You are absolutely expendable to corporate
culture.  Why are they not worried about laid-off workers' staggering loss of
buying power?  The answer is to be found in the not too distant past. 

When the great depression idled countless workers they did not have the wages
to buy much of anything, but wealth remained and even became more
concentrated. There was great wealth before the emergence of the middle class
and there will be even greater wealth after the elimination of great chunks
of middle class people around the globe.

One overlooked but important aspect of wealth is that it exists in contrast.
What good is your million dollar salary if you are not several orders of
magnitude above the average worker?  You can get richer merely by making
others poorer.  It really really works.  Besides, peasants are easier to
exploit and much more fun to rule.

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                        I N   T H E   D R I V E

By Jim Andrews

Even if you live in a remote village in one of the Aleutian Islands, chances
are you haven't been able to walk out your front door at some point in the
last six months without being smacked in the face with a fish that has the
word "JAVA" printed on it.  Talk of Java has inundated otherwise civil
discussions across the Internet.  On the USENET, Java-related posts have
almost caught up with AOL'ers musing "Mac sux.  PC r00lz."  "No.  PC suks.
Mac r00lz." (Usually, cryptically posted in groups like "rec.crocheting".)
Programming languages, in general, don't tend to bring the word "excitement"
to mind.  But if C++ is a stuffy, classical musician, then Java is definitely
a rock star.

Why all the fuss?  Well, to whittle a long story to a point, it boils down to
the fact that you can make your web pages do nifty-keen things with it;
things that the web pages down the block can't do.  And if there's one thing
that people like to do with their web pages, it's nifty-keen things that the
web pages down the block can't do.  The language, mind you, is a full-fledged
programming language that can create stand-alone, system-portable
applications, but I feel that most people will probably come to know (and
love) it as a way to put little animations of Beavis and Butthead in the
corner of their web pages, along with the sound of them singing the "Iron
Man" riff.

For those of you who fit that description, OR those of you who are more
serious-minded and want to do your taxes on your web site for some reason
(while Beavis and Butthead sing the "Iron Man" riff, no doubt), then Symantec
Cafe is something you will definitely want to check out (read: buy).  Cafe
removes Java from the cold, hard "text-editor-command-line" environs and
brings it into the warm, friendly Windows era. (Those of you still using CP/M
and hating everything to do with Windows, please, send me mail about it at
jimndrws@serv.net...I'm easily amused.)  Now, while Cafe is more akin to
Visual Basic than anything else, look-and-feel wise, it is NOT an easy way
out of learning Java.  You'll still need to know how to code your way through
a project, Cafe just provides you with great project management tools to do
it with.

Probably my favorite tool in the package is the Resource Editor, which makes
creating the look of your applet a snap.  Visual Basic users will feel right
at home with this tool;  simply click on whatever interface element you wish
to insert into your applet, then drag it out to size on your form.  Changing
the attributes of the various elements will be equally intuitive to VB users.

Another handy addition for testing your applet (or application) is a
one-button replacement for the dreaded command-line javac compiler.  Just
click on the little running man, and the Applet Viewer pops up and runs your
current project with no muss, no fuss.  Very nice.

For those of you familiar with Sunsoft's JDK, you'll also appreciate the
extensive debugging features of Cafe.  If an error is found, just click on
it, and you'll end up in the editor, right at the offending line of code.  A
far cry, to say the least, from the cryptic rants that spew out of javac -d.

For online program support, you can't really beat the comp.lang.java.* USENET
groups.  There are not only plenty of Java gurus who lurk around in there,
but plenty of good people who can help with specific Cafe questions as
well.  Of course, Symantec isn't exactly slacking in the online support
department, either.  Once you're a paying customer, you can visit the
Subscription Center at the http://cafe.symantec.com/, where you'll find such
niceties as the latest version of Cafe, new additions, an informative FAQ,
tips for getting started, and lots of other nifty things to make you happy.

My recommendation is that if you are already programming Java, do yourself a
favor and go pick up this program.  It will save you a considerable amount of
time.  If you'd like to start programming Java, do yourself the favor of
learning it in this environment.  All in all, this is an extremely
well-thought-out package, and it does very well at what it's paid to do.

(Price:  Limited-time introductory price is $129.95, suggested retail of
$299.95; Symantec Cafe Home Page: http://cafe.symantec.com/)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

                        P H I L ' S   G A R A G E

By Phil Dirt

"Knowing which side of the shoe the Shinola goes on is not always a good
thing." - Dirt, 1996

Serendipity. ser.en.dip.i.ty -  n. 1) The faculty of
making fortunate discoveries by accident. [From the characters in the Persian
fairy tale "The Three Princes of Serendip," who made such discoveries, from
Persian Sarandhp, Sri Lanka, from Arabic Sarandhb.]  2) Stepping in it, and a
darn good thing too. -ser.en.dip.i.tous adj. -ser.en.dip.i.tous.ly adv.

HISTORY: 1) English author Horace Walpole, whose reputation is based
primarily on his 3,000 plus letters, coined the word serendipity in a letter
dated January 28, 1754, where he says that this discovery, indeed, is almost
of that kind which I call Serendipity, a very expressive word. The word
itself may have come to him serendipitously. Walpole mutated an old name for
Sri Lanka, Serendip. The name was part of the title of a silly fairy tale,
called The Three Princes of Serendip: as their highnesses traveled, they were
always making discoveries, by accidents and sagacity, of things which they
were not in quest of . . .

2) Surf guitarist and podiatrist Larry Vydell (imaginary guitar giant),
remarked upon tripping over an outboard reverb while reading an interview
with Susan Sarandon, "Hey, that sounds COOL!," and rightly dubbed the lucky
discovery Sarandon Dipity, due in part to his dippy behavior and reading
matter.

The continuum of mankind on Earth is full of amazing accidents that change
the course of history. The name for such unexpected finds is serendipity.
Such weighty and profound foundlings classifiable as serendipitous should
not be confused with the law of unintended outcomes i. e. governments and
bureaucracies.

One of those marvelous accidents is the reverb kick. It was inevitable that
it would occur, given the design of the device. The outboard has a transducer
at each end of a spring suspended in a metal can. A certain magnitude jostle
will result in a magnificent crash.

The designers originally intended spring reverbs to reside inboard in
keyboards, like the mighty Wurlitzer organs. They were unconcerned about the
possibility of the springs striking the metal box because that could only
happen when the device is being moved, and organs sat quite still while in
use. They saw such an event as unlikely, so they took no precautions against
it.

Musician/technicians are not unlike auto mechanic/hot rodders. Just cuz the
device was designed to be used in a keyboard doesn't mean it can't be used
somewhere else. Guitarist/technicians in search of sustain saw an application.
How they used it is an example of the law of unintended outcomes.

When Leo Fender put a set of springs in a wooden box to plug between the
guitar and the amp, he had no idea that he would cause the discovery of the
first self-contained sound effect generator. Not everyone who tripped over
their reverb or who heard the splashy sound it made while being moved
recognized it's potential. Indeed, its like the guy who poured the white
muck down the sink because it wasnt what he was looking for and thereby
missed discovering Latex. Serendipity ignored or denied is the norm. So,
when our hero said "Hey, that sounds COOL!," he demonstrated the real
difference between serendipity and accident: Recognition!

Imagine the first time in practice with his chums in the band when he
intentionally kicks the box on the floor at just the right moment. I have
to wonder if his band mates got it, or just put up with it.

While it's not real common in surf records, it does exist more there than
elsewhere, except in Iron Butterfly recordings. The reverb kick got it's
start in some really great sessions, like the Vydells Unknown, where it opens
the song and simply takes it over the top. So, why am I telling you this? Cuz
I get a lot of surf music to review, and I record a lot of surf bands, and I
love THAT sound! I wanna hear it MORE! Besides, it is a relatively unused
effect that is quite natural in a relatively un-effected genre.

So, how is it done? Well, first lets talk a bit of shop. When using an
outboard with a loud clean amp like a Fender Showman, it is imperative to
place the outboard with its axis radially with respect to the amp, and off
to the side if possible. Why? To avoid acoustic coupling between the springs
in the reverb and the amp, which can result in an unwanted unmusical howling.
Another side effect of the reverb is illustrated in a story Paul Johnson told
me once. Not long after he finally succumbed to the reverb toward the end of
his days with the Belairs, he was annoyed when he could hear his bandmates
stomping around on stage right through his amp. Their clomping was being
transmitted through the stage floor into the outboard and coming out in the
amp. Paul ended up hanging his outboard from the rafters to avoid the
coupling.

Ok, so that's a bit on where to put the outboard. As to the kick, you knock
it with your foot across the springs (kick at the wide front or back) with a
sharp strike. If you kick too softly, not much happens. If you kick too hard,
you can knock over the reverb, or even disconnect the springs. But wait,
there's more. You'll quickly discover that there is a timing difference -- a
delay from strike to sound. Why? Well, it's in the nature of the mechanical
design. The sound comes from the springs striking the sides of the can they
hang in. They have to be sufficiently moved, or more correctly, the tank has
to be sufficiently accelerated for the can to overtake the springs , thus
striking them. It's a physics thing. The delay comes from the time required
for the can to move and strike the springs. Once thats done, the can quickly
stops moving, but the now vibrating springs bounce from wall to wall for a
bit before settling into a slow decay of the resonant metallic joyous noise.

As you can well imagine, the longevity of your reverb can be compromised if
you abuse it, so be careful. Still, they are pretty tough. I've only once
caused the springs to pop off their hooks on my 62 Fender Outboard, and
re-hanging them was easy and solved the problem. The most likely damage is
mechanical shock to the tube filaments.

So, if you are a musician, try it. It'll get the attention of those louts
drinking at the bar who should be listening but aren't, and it'll add a smile
to my face when I hear your recording. If you are a listener and fan, now you
know all about that glorious splash!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

                     T H E   A U D I O   F I L E

By Cai Campbell

THIS MONTH'S TOPIC: The Beach Boys - Pet Sounds: 180+ Pure Virgin Vinyl
Analogue Pressing (DCC Compact Classics)

This most recent vinyl issue of Brian Wilson's opus is not notable for the
music.  This record has stood the test of time, and sounds as pure, fresh,
honest, and technically brilliant as it did when it was first released 30
years ago.  What IS notable about this release is that it is yet another
candidate for the "definitive" Pet Sounds record, of which there are many.

I've always had a special place in my heart for this record, and as an
audiophile and collector of fine recordings, I was genuinely excited when I
spotted this new quality pressing of an old classic.  Along with this DCC
release, I also have at my disposal a very clean original "duophonic"
pressing, the 1989 Japanese CD, and the 1990 deluxe "remastered" CD.

When I first began buying CD's, Pet Sounds was one of the first albums I
wanted, so that I could enjoy it in all its shining brilliance.  Then I found
that Capitol was not releasing it, for reasons unknown to me, so I had to
shell out the big bucks for the Japanese import.  I was not disappointed and
have been extremely satisfied with this pressing.  In my mind, it was the
definitive Pet Sounds.

Then, a year later, Capitol finally issued Pet Sounds on CD, and I found out
why they delayed: they were going all out in giving this fine recording the
treatment it deserved.  They tracked down the best masters they could find
and painstakingly transferred these 30-year-old analog tapes to digital tape
where they were then further processed using Sonic Solutions digital noise
reduction system.  Three bonus tracks were added to sweeten the pot, and an
extremely informative 24 page booklet was included, giving background
stories, track-by-track tidbits of information, and many pictures from the
original album cover photo shoot.  The CD sounded great, and it became, in my
mind, the new definitive Pet Sounds.

It wasn't long after that when the newness of the CD boom started to wear off
and the realization sank in that analog had digital beat when it came to
richness and fullness of sound, and that even though it was easier to make a
CD that sounded great, the real secret to great sound was a finely crafted
analog LP played on the right equipment.

I was convinced, record unheard, that this new audiophile pressing of Pet
Sounds was going to become my new definitive.  I decided I was going to do a
comparison of all four of my Pet Sounds releases and decide which, if any,
was the true definitive.

One thing which troubled me about the DCC release is that there was
absolutely no mention of the master source used to produce the record.  Most
audiophile releases go out of their way to claim that they used only the
original masters.  Instead, the DCC release touted their "all vacuum-tube"
cutting system and gave credit to the gentleman who performed the obscure
(although important) task of plating.  This seemed almost a smoke screen to
cover the fact that the original master recordings were NOT used to produce
this record.

When I began comparing the DCC LP jacket and insert with the Capitol
remastered CD booklet, I noticed many similarities, including the same photo
out-takes and the same statement written in 1990 by Brian Wilson for the
special CD release.  And then I listened to these two disks along with the
original duophonic pressing and the Japanese CD.  The differences between the
four of them were very noticeable, with the exception of the DCC LP and the
Capitol remastered CD: they sounded way too similar!

I then reached the conclusion that the DCC LP used the same DIGITAL master
tape used to produce the remastered CD!  It certainly would have been the
easiest thing to do, rather than go back and perform the painstaking process
of remastering the master tapes using analog methods.  At this point I felt
cheated.  Would they really take a digital master and go to all the trouble
to create an analog representation of it?  It seemed totally backwards!
Multiple attempts to contact DCC Compact Classics were unsuccessful, so I
cannot confirm that a digital master tape was used to produce this
"analogue" recording, but I have a sneaking suspicion that this is the case.

My fears did not subside as I listened to this record.  Although it does
sound very clean and "warmer" than the remastered CD, the low end of the
sound spectrum seems to come too much forward, sometimes overshadowing subtle
passages such as the orchestrated bits on "Don't Cry." The DCC LP seemed to
have a thin high end.  I attribute this and the too-full low end to the
digital master being pumped through all the analog equipment.  With an analog
source, this process would have helped retain the original warmth of the
sound.  In this case, it seems as if an almost artificial warmth and depth
were added.

The remastering effort done on the CD was brilliantly executed.  In most
cases, the remastered CD uncovers certain subtleties only hinted at on the
original pressing and Japanese CD.  This came at the price of sacrificing
some of the high end of the sound spectrum, however, but it is barely
noticeable and is only a minor complaint.

If the DCC LP was indeed mastered from the same digital tape used on the
remastered CD, it does succeed in amplifying this effort.  There is something
to be said for digital recordings being delivered in an analog format.  But
it boggles my mind how DCC can deliver such a product and claim it to be an
"Analogue Pressing."

My original duophonic release related the most warmth and fattest sound.
Some of that may be attributed to the duophonic process, which essentially
splits the sound spectrum into two channels and pumps them through the left
and right channels to achieve a stereo effect.  But I can't attribute much
of the warmth to this.  Tape hiss is evident on the Japanese CD, but it comes
closer to the sound of the original LP than the remastered CD.  The
remastered CD offers a greater level of clarity, which allows the listener a
chance to better appreciate the genius of Brian Wilson.  The DCC LP elevates
this experience a bit, but at the cost of overshadowing certain subtleties.

When all is said and done, I do not believe there is a definitive Pet Sounds.
The closest thing, I can imagine, would be a pristine copy of the original
mono release, something which I will always be on the lookout for (if anyone
out there has one they want to part with, please let me know!) I can point to
each of these releases and say some aspect of one is better than the other,
but it would be very hard for me to recommend one issue over another.  One
thing I CAN recommend is that you buy this record, in ANY format, and listen
to it in earnest.  Pet Sounds offers complex and moving compositions which
sound simple only on the surface.  It is a true pop masterpiece deserving a
prominent position in your musical collection.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

                        D J   R A N T S


 By DJ Johnson

 A CAUTIONARY TALE FOR THOSE WHO NEED ONE MORE REASON NOT TO GET A CAT

      This is a sad story about my good friend, Julie.  It's alright to see
 the humor in it, because there certainly is something funny about what 
 happened to her that night.  That was the night she was getting ready to
 move out of her apartment.  Her cat, Grizzabella, had been staring at her
 all night long, waiting for her to either feed her or drop dead, thereby
 accomplishing the same thing.  It wasn't a longshot, either, because Julie
 was dead tired from cleaning and scrubbing the apartment.  There was one
 other set of eyes trained on her at that moment.  Her boss had talked her
 into kitty-sitting while she was out of town, and the cute little thing was
 hiding and watching the action.  It was smart to hide.  Grizzabella had 
 been chasing the thing around the apartment ever since it arrived, swiping
 at it with her sharp claws as much to tenderize the thing as to hurt it.
      It's important to understand that Julie is a pushover for cats.  Me,
 I think they're great for sticking under your tire so it won't roll when
 you jack up the car, but Julie loves all furred things, even if they abuse 
 her, which Grizzabella surely does with alarming regularity.  If Grizz bites   
 Julie's hand, Julie hugs harder.  If Grizz sinks a claw into Julie's lip,
 Julie thinks she just needs a little lovin' and attention.  If Grizz bites
 MY hand, I'll just tell Julie that Grizz moved away to find her place in
 life and left no frickin' forwarding address, you know what I'm sayin'?
      On this particular night, Julie was getting very tired and whiney,
 which may have prompted what was to come.  As Julie made the final few 
 swipes of the sponge on the countertop, mini-cat let out a tiny roar and
 lunged out from under that couch at blazing speed and began to run around
 the apartment in circles.  That in itself would be reeeeeeally cute, if that
 damned animal from hell hadn't had...the problem.  See, it had diahrrea
 shooting out its ass like the rooster tail behind an unlimited hydroplane,
 and it was landing all over everything in the formerly spotless apartment.
 Round and round and round she goes, close yer eyes and plug yer nose.  It
 was the most horrific explosion since Mount St. Helens shot it's wad in  
 1980.  Faster and faster the cat ran, spraying brown death in a constant
 and efficient manner as Julie watched helplessly.
      Grizzabella's whereabouts during what has now become known as "The 
 Great KittyShitInciDint" are unknown, but knowing her insatiable appetite, 
 she was probably just watching and waiting like a vulture for the kitty 
 to drop dead.  This was Grizz's nature, and you can bet the kitty didn't
 think Grizz just needed a little lovin' and attention.  The kitty figured
 Grizz needed an appetite suppressor.  
      Actually, the kitty didn't think anything at the moment.  It was still
 in high gear, spraying the entire apartment a yellow-brown.  Nothing was
 spared.  Countertops, carpet, moving boxes, clothing, VCR, TV, walls...
 hell, even the tops of CUPBOARDS got the treatment!  And still, the hairy
 little bastard ran, screaming whatever cats scream when their insides 
 explode and generating more propulsive force than was needed to get the 
 Apollo 13 astronauts home.  
      Just as Julie was about to faint, the kitty stopped on a dime.  Seeing
 that the dime was still clean, the damned thing shat upon it, then let out
 a low moaning sound...and fell over sideways.  The silence was sudden and
 uncomfortable, and the smell was amplified for poor Julie because she had
 begun to hyperventilate.  Eventually, she sat down in the middle of the
 room (on the one square foot of floor that kitty had missed) and cried.  
      Much time has gone by since the KittyShitInciDint, but not every wound 
 has healed.  Smart investors noticed the sharp increase in sales by the
 Scott Towel company, and they went long, only to see the price come crashing
 back to earth the following day.  Nobody knows how many rolls of those
 towels Julie had to use, but we do know that it took eight hours to rid the
 apartment of the kitty crap.  It took another few days for the smell to
 fade.  The kitty lived, and seemed perfectly normal the next morning.
 Grizzabella lost interest in the thing as a food item, proving that even
 cats have some taste.  The long reaching effects of the experience can be
 seen in the fact that Grizz is the first cat on record to teach itself to 
 use a toilet.  Julie never kitty-sat for that woman again, and has a good 
 laugh every time she asks her to.  Me, I'm unchanged by the entire event.
 I wasn't there, but even if I had been, I doubt that I would have disliked
 cats more than I do now.  Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a tire to change.

 (Note: Since this column was written, Julie's cat, Grizzabella, has come
  down with a nasty case of death.  This column, therefore, is dedicated to
  that ornery feline.  We think good thoughts about her and realize that
  right at this moment she's probably ignoring God).


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                      ]]       ]]    ]]    ]]     ]]  ]]      !
    :                 ""      """"   """"  """""  """""     +        . 




We have now traced the history of women from Paradise to the nineteenth
century and have heard nothing through the long roll of the ages but the
clank of their fetters.
   - Lady Jane Wilde (1821-96), Irish author, poet, translator.


I have been a soreheaded occupant of a file drawer labeled "Science
Fiction" .  . . and I would like out, particularly since so many serious
critics regularly mistake the drawer for a urinal.

  - Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.


We would be a lot safer if the Government would take its money out of
science and put it into astrology and the reading of palms. . . . Only in
superstition is there hope. If you want to become a friend of civilization,
then become an enemy of the truth and a fanatic for harmless balderdash.

  - Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.


           Elemental Fury
           B.A. Punkert

I hear the sky crying outside the window
Pregnant raindrops shatter themselves against the glass
And the cold pavement.
Collecting in muddy rivers and stagnant ponds
They flow desperately away
Fleeing the onslaught of staring souls 
The ferociousness of the wind
The violation of the encroaching sun

A finger of light points down from the sky
Accusing, angry
Followed by the sharp sound of a slap
The air rushing back in to fill the void
(Nature abhors a vacuum)

I watch the clouds as they vacillate
Between gentle sobs of regret
And howls of unmitigated fury
The cheeks of the world
Dried by the stinging hands of the wind.

I pull on a sweater
And head out into the storm.
Logic tells me I should stay inside, warm and dry...
But all the logic in the world can't stop this need
So the door snicks behind me
And I turn my face to the wall of water.

"Laugh and the world laughs with you."
I stand
Kissed by the wind
Drenched to the skin
Pummelled by the tears of the gods.
Purified - 
Surrounded by agony and beauty
I open my soul to the elements
And let the devastating sobs of the torn, bleeding soul of the universe
Blend with mine....




Elvis transcends his talent to the point of dispensing with it altogether.

  - Greil Marcus, U.S. rock journalist.


You can't separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless
he has his freedom.

  - Malcolm X



You have to be a bastard to make it, and that's a fact. And the Beatles are
the biggest bastards on earth.

  - John Lennon


A composer is a guy who goes around forcing his will on unsuspecting air
molecules, often with the assistance of unsuspecting musicians.

  - Frank Zappa


I don't respond well to mellow, you know what I mean, I-I have a tendency
to . . . if I get too mellow, I-I ripen and then rot.

  - Woody Allen


There's a basic rule which runs through all kinds of music, kind of an
unwritten rule. I don't know what it is. But I've got it.

  - Ron Wood


FILMREVIEWFILMREVIEWFILMREVIEWFILMREVIEWFILMREVIEWFILMREVIEWFILMREVIEW

"The Kids In The Hall: Brain Candy"
(Dave Foley, Bruce McCullough, Kevin McDonald, Mark McKinney, Scott Thompson)

        Seeing this flick was a sad occasion in itself: knowing that
this will most likely be the last product of the original cast members is
heartbreaking. It was nice to see their writing mature since their
show (which, at various points in time, could be seen on CBS, HBO and Comedy
Central) first began six years ago. After closing their last episode in '95,
a movie was almost instantly in the works.
        The product: "Brain Candy." A fan cannot help having mixed reactions
after its first viewing. The film is CLEARLY not of the high quality seen in
their off-beat sit-com. Though the movie constantly straddles the line
between good humor and "bad taste"--nothing new--the writing does not
consistently hold up. The performances often lack the vitality that usually
leaves the "kids'" followers with a full stomach. A lot of the care-free
element seems to have been lost.
        However, "Brain Candy," by regular-folks' standards, is rather
amusing and worth the seven bucks. The plot involves a drug company
pressured to release a new, marketable product. One of the company's
scientists (McDonald) creates Gleemonex, a cure for deep depression, which
ends up surpassing penicillin in sales. Conflict arises because the drug
was not properly tested. The cast (the five of them playing over forty roles
in the movie) has assembled quite a few amusing characters: the irate,
foreign, homo-phobic taxi driver (McKinney), native to the sit-com; a man
who is convinced that he is not homosexual but who continues to watch gay
porn and have casual sex with men (Thompson); a female scientist romancing a
co-worker (McCullough); and Cancer-Boy, a wheel-chair bound child of no more
than 10, apparently undergoing radiation therapy--one might be scared to
laugh for fear of a surly man standing up and yelling, "Hey! My kid has
cancer!" Oh, well. Watching this movie is no time to be politically correct.

Overall rating: 7 (out of 10)


"It's a wordless state I'm in, as if outer space were walking through a room
outlined like a person."

   - John Frusciante (former guitarist of the Red Hot Chili Peppers)


-----------------------------------------------------------------------------



           E-MAIL ADDRESSES FOR CONTACTING COSMIK DEBRIS' WRITERS

                      
               DJ Johnson (Editor)......moonbaby@serv.net
               James Andrews............jimndrws@serv.net
               Cai Campbell.............vex@serv.net
               coLeSLAw.................coleslaw@greatgig.com
               Shaun Dale...............stdale@well.com
               Phil Dirt................Luft.F@diversey.geis.com
               Andrew Ian Feinberg......afeinber@panix.com
               David Fenigsohn..........a-davef@microsoft.com
               Alex Gedeon..............abraxas@primenet.com
               Lauren Giglio............MHND71B@prodigy.com
               Keith Gillard............liquid@uniserve.com
               Louise Johnson...........aquaria@serv.net
               Steven Leith.............leith@serv.net
               Steve Marshall...........MHND71F@prodigy.com
               The Platterpuss..........Plattrpuss@aol.com


   
           Cosmik Debris' WWW site..http://www.greatgig.com/cosmikdebris
           Subscription requests....moonbaby@serv.net
           Cai Campbell's BBS (Great Gig In The Sky)..206-935-8486
           Phil Dirt's Surf Site is at http://www.cygnus.com/kfjc/surf
           Keith Gillard's "Liquid Records WWW site is located
             at http://haven.uniserve.com/~liquid

           And a VERY special thanks to Gabe Martin for letting us use
           his cool cartoons in The Debris Field.  Gabe's outrageous WWW
           site is at http://www.cts.com/~borderln/todays.html and there
           are hundreds of his cartoons to check out there. (Cartoon ran
           in WWW version only, of course.)


