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     '                                                                  '
    '   anada                  "J'accuse Xmas"                   13 jan  '
   '     259                     by Schoolboy                     2001    '
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        So Christmas (or Xmas as I like to write because I’m a rather sad,
 pedantic atheist) has been and gone and thank fuck for that.  Xmas is even
 less fun than New Year’s eve as this is forced “enjoyment” with your family.
 Forced enjoyment is excruciating enough, and there’s scarcely anything worse
 than when it falls when you’re in a bad mood, but when you have to pretend
 to have fun AND like all your family you just want to run away screaming.

        I hope your Xmas was great, by the way, and you got all you wished
 for from this occasion.

        It is a cliché that families row during Xmas and why is that?  It’s
 because it’s Xmas.  We find we put so much pressure on ourselves not only to
 have fun but to have a sense of togetherness, kinship within the family
 unit, as it’s forced down our red-raw propaganda slots, that we totally lose
 it at the slightest sign of discord.

        It’s the same feeling that Xmas has to be a perfect time, surrounded
 by loving relatives that drives The Alone to suicide.  Jesus, isn’t Xmas
 shit?

        I’m not a Scrooge.  I go significantly into debt to fund the present
 buying, just so I can justify getting presents.  I confess it puts a smile
 on my face to get a present right and create gasps of joy from an elderly
 relative.  I like eating chocolate and drinking rich alcoholic beverages but
 I don’t really like it in the context of Xmas.

        Think about it.  What happened 4 Xmases ago.  Can you remember?  Can
 you remember anything much about Xmas in 1992?  Nope, neither can I.

        And what’s all this crap about Festive Spirit and “a time to be kind
 to your fellow man”.  EVERDAY should be a time to be kind to your fellow
 man!  It should be everyday that your boss comes in and insists we start the
 working day with a glass of bucks fizz and at least every other day he sends
 you home an hour early.

        All right, I went a bit far then but I mean we should help people out
 and be understanding at all times.  It is typical of Man that we should
 attempt to come up with a festive “period”.  To ghettoise the community
 instinct to the depths of winter is poetically telling of our flaws.

        Still, I suppose without Xmas we wouldn’t get ANY presents or enjoy a
 short period in the year when bosses smile at you, every other colleague
 brings in mince pies and chocolates and your employer virtually pays for
 your food for about a week with Xmas parties.

        But then without Xmas we wouldn’t have to travel in the worst weather
 possible for hours visiting family and spending $100 in unleaded (it’s $1.16
 per litre in Britain!!) to do it which is just about paid for by the Xmas
 money you get.

        The only thing you can’t argue about it is it’s going to happen every
 year for the rest of your life.  Merry life.
                                                                            
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  '                                                                        ' 
 `   anada259   by Schoolboy                        (c) 2001 anada e'zine   `
